veronica mars. (sardonicspy) wrote in brightlightlogs, @ 2010-06-11 12:01:00 |
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Entry tags: | logan echolls, veronica mars |
Who: Logan Echolls and Veronica Mars
Where: A karaoke bar
When: Friday, June 11th; Evening
What: There's an epic karaoke fight, followed by a public angst-fest, followed by kissing, followed by free drinks.
Rating: PG-13 for language and some seriously effed up behavior.
Status: Complete
Veronica had to admit, she was a little apprehensive as she followed Logan into the bar. It wasn't that he was acting a little off, even though he was. It was more like they were skirting the edges of dangerous territory. She knew it started with their surfing lesson back in Tijuana. She could still remember, all too clearly, how it felt to be close to him out in the water. How ready she had been to throw away everything she had with Piz for a fleeting moment of impulsiveness. Then they'd come home and they suffered through another round of drunken texts that had left her curled up on the floor of her closet trying to muffle her cries. And then, oh, and then, the grand finale. Their conversation on the network wherein Veronica as good as told him she still had feelings for him.
And after all of that, here she was, out with Logan. Alone. On a Friday night. In a bar. Very dangerous territory. She sighed, and ignored the cigarette smoke permeating the air as they made their way toward a table. Their number should have been three tonight. Logan had initially invited both Veronica and Piz out to the bar with him. But at the last minute, Piz had opted out. Veronica had been two seconds away from canceling as well when an image popped into her mind. Logan, annoyed and angry at being ditched in favor of Piz would start shooting his mouth of about Tijuana. Nothing had technically happened, but Veronica knew Logan, and she knew he'd still find a way to dig into Piz and make it excruciating. No, she wasn't going to risk it. So she had kissed her boyfriend goodbye and promised to be home early before departing with Logan.
They sat down at one of the tables, and a cocktail waitress appeared. Veronica ordered a bottle of water. She knew she had to be one of the worst college girls on the planet. If you were looking at her party girl stats, that is. But when your mom is an alcoholic, and you've been roofied and raped, the loss of control that alcohol brings never seemed too appealing. She rarely drank, if ever. Her mind was one of her best assets, and she didn't like dulling it by getting drunk. Although, she might be willing to give it a shot if she couldn't manage to loosen up anytime soon. Her conversation so far that evening had been stiff and unnatural. She didn't like feeling this way around Logan. He was one of the few people around she could really be herself with. She took a deep breath, vowing to snap herself out of it if it was the last thing she did. They could get past this, and they were going to have fun. Or else, damnit.
"Classy joint you've found us, Echolls." She said, giving him her best sardonic smile. "I'm particularly impressed by the mounted moose head. It gives the place a little je ne sais quoi."
Logan was on edge. This was nothing new, because he was always on the edge in one way or another, but this was the dangerous kind. The mood that permeated around him promised that one step in the wrong direction and someone was going to end up in tears. This was the worst possible time to be around Veronica, but he had been in a sunny mood when he invited her and Piz out for a drink. He'd gotten to know his rival in Tijuana and while Piz wasn't about to be getting drunk and singing songs with him any time soon, they got along as politely as possible. After their near kiss and the drunken fiasco, Logan was trying to accept yet again that he'd just have to wait it out with Veronica until she figured out what she wanted. He knew he'd wait as long as it took, but that didn't mean he had to be happy about it. In fact, he had plenty of seething furious feelings about the entire situation that had to be regularly medicated by getting trashed and making trouble. If he did that, it kept her safe from the more vicious side of his tongue, and he wouldn't fuck up his chance with her.
That was until he went to the pool and saw them together. Being cute and affectionate and looking like any other couple. He'd seen the adoration on Piz's face and known he was once in that exact same position, thinking that the sun rose and set on Veronica's behest. And she was telling Logan to wait, she was implying she still loved him, but then she'd go up there with Piz and act like a young freaking couple in love. Then he was the jackass trying to steal her away, not the guy who loved her to start with, not the one who had been through everything and saved her and loved her and hated her more than Piz or anyone else could ever understand. It set him in a mood, one that Lilly couldn't even break, although he usually softened with her. Lilly was the girl Logan dreamed of, the first woman he'd ever loved, and being around her was intoxicating. But he saw his father, and Weevil, and everyone else, and that was how he could also understand Veronica still hating him over Madison. Everything was a mess. Just one awful mess.
He was trying to keep a good mood for her when she showed up without Piz. In fact he preferred it that way, but then Veronica started being in that snarky funk of hers. She probably missed her precious boyfriend. The one who had no idea what he was in for if Logan Echolls threw off the good boy shackles and really tried to cause trouble. He ordered a beer instead of a heavier mixed drink he much preferred, because he'd promised to keep it sober that night for Veronica. It was one of the conditions of them going out in the first place. It was karaoke night at the bar, he had no idea about that, and his eyes flickered to the stage since they were starting to set up. Everyone else in the bar seemed like they were in high spirits. Perhaps that would rub off on them.
"Only the best for you, Mars. This is a country club compared to the Fitzpatricks dive bar you brought me to once." The one where he pulled out a gun and she almost got into serious trouble. Great thing to bring up, Logan. Still, considering what had passed between them, the fact he wasn't hounding her over it was a surprise. "Karaoke too. You should go up there and sing some Marilyn Monroe. A little Britney. Teeny bopper it up."
Veronica dug at the edge of the scarred wooden table with her fingernail. She looked up when Logan mentioned the Fitzpatricks' bar. Her stomach turned slightly as she remembered the fear, pain, and all around awfulness of the time the two of them had been inside. Wow. They were both batting a thousand tonight, weren't they? She gave him a raised eyebrow, and tilted her head slightly, but said nothing.
She did give him a small smile at his karaoke comment. "Please." She said, adopting a snotty teenage voice. "You know that I am like totally an Avril girl. She is like so hardcore."
The waitress returned with her water and his beer, and Veronica was grateful to have something to keep her hands busy. She twisted the cap off and took a long drink before setting it back down on the counter. "I'm am the worst drinking buddy ever." She smiled. "Bet you're missing Dick right about now, aren't ya?"
"Avril is so last season," Logan said in a matching falsetto. They really were off, but it actually was easier knowing neither one of them was in a good mood. Her good mood probably would've just annoyed him more at this point. As if she had anything to be in a bad mood about. She had everything she wanted, didn't she? Her father, her boyfriend, both best friends, and an ex to kick around when she got bored. Sounded pretty amazing, really.
He took the beer and sucked down a deep swallow from the get go, setting it down with a heavy clang. "Yeah, a little. Not just because of that. Puck is basically the same kind of company to get into trouble with, so I find myself actually missing Dick." Logan winced as someone got up to start the night off with a classic 'I Will Survive.' Such a typical choice. It seemed that he and Dick had a shallow friendship on the surface, but they had been close for years. "Not as much as I miss his step-mother," he joked and leaned his cheek into a waiting fist. "There's a woman identical to her and Trina here. It's so weird."
It was true, Veronica did have a lot more here than he did. She had asked him the question about Dick in jest, finding it funny that anyone could actually miss his presence, but she could see in Logan's face that he actually did. She felt a little guilty about bringing it up. Until he brought up Kendall. That sent any burgeoning feelings of compassion scurrying off pretty quickly.
Veronica echoed Logan's wince when she heard the opening lines of "I Will Survive." Seriously? Must people continue to be complete clichés of themselves? She rolled her eyes and took another sip from her bottle of water.
"Another Kendall." She deadpanned. "Fantastic. I did see the girl who looks like Trina, though. She seemed ... very un-Trina-like." That is to say, intelligent and actually nice. But she kept that to herself. "There's a girl who looks exactly like Meg, too." Thoughts of Meg spiraled into thoughts of Duncan, which wasn't exactly helping her black mood. Way to go, Veronica.
Veronica had a lot more than him in general, at least when it came to outside support. Logan's support group literally consisted of Dick and occasionally Veronica herself. His parents were dead, he barely tolerated Trina, and while he made a lot of friends easily, none of them were close. For some reason things had felt ... easier here. Lilly was there, and he couldn't stop from being drawn to her, but he also got to know John Connor and his robot companion, and Puck was easy company. Plus after their Star Wars night there were plenty of others that they knew better just around the halls, and it was nice, actually. He didn't mind being kidnapped, so much. What exactly did he have to go back to?
"She's not like Kendall either. Well. Maybe a little like Kendall. I think somewhat smarter, which isn't saying a great deal." Logan's attraction to Kendall was completely shallow, so he didn't have any real affection toward the older woman. She amused him if nothing else. "She isn't like Trina at all. We talked for a few minutes and no insults were slung around. It was eerie." He was just glad so far there were no doubles of him or Veronica. Things were confusing enough. "I saw her. I thought it was Meg at first, what with the dead people rising, but I guess not. That must be strange for you. No one wants to think of another love triangle when they've already got one on their hands." It was a mild comment but the first that pointed at their situation instead of ignoring it.
Veronica wasn't surprised when Logan finally made some mention of their situation. She'd been waiting for it, truth be told. With both their moods as they were, it was bound to come up sooner or later. What did surprise her, however, was how low-key the comment was. Maybe she'd just spend too much time preparing to do battle with Logan over the years, but she was always waiting for him to go for the kill. She knew it was ugly, and she hated that her mind still went there, even after all the effort he'd been making to behave himself.
She sighed and toyed with the label on her water bottle. The girl singing "I Will Survive" had finished her song, and the DJ was up on stage attempting to entice others to get up and publicly embarrass themselves.
"More like love square," she mumbled, thinking of Lilly and Logan together. God. When had her life become such a soap opera? Kidnapping. Twins. Obscenely complicated love entanglements. She might as well be on Days of Our freaking Lives. Her head hurt. Maybe she should have a drink.
Low-key for the time being. Logan was just working up to it, and that was part of why he felt wary. He knew it was a bad idea to crop up things, and honestly if Piz had come along it would've been easy to make this another night and not worry so much about it. He hated seeing them together, but Piz was almost like a safety net for them in public places. When they were alone, that's when the danger came along. Either it was because he wanted to kiss her, confess his love and beg her to forgive him, or because he wanted to punish her for how much he was hurting. He sighed and drank his beer again, hoping the others in the bar or the karaoke might distract him from what he really wanted to say. That was, until he picked up on her mumble.
Dark eyes snapped back to her and narrowed. "It's unfair to hold her over my head as if it is the same thing. It's not, and you know it. The only one in this that has all the power, holds all the cards, is you. That must be why you like it." Veronica enjoyed being in control, and he knew that. It was something they fought over regularly, mostly because to him it was also a sign of distrust. She could never let him have the upper hand, not even for a second, and if he did, she'd fight him tooth and nail for it.
Veronica bristled at his words. Is that what he thought? That she liked this situation? That she liked feeling guilty and angry, and jealous, and confused every second of the day? Well that was just perfect. Her eyes flashed with anger and she leaned forward, intending to correct his very flawed ideas of what this was, and what they were. But two things stopped her. The first, was remembering that they were in a public place. She'd had enough public fights with Logan to last a life-time. And she certainly wasn't going to be the evening entertainment for a bunch of drunks in a karaoke bar. No matter how angry she was at him. The second, was the realization that she was playing right into Logan's hands. She could see on his face that he wanted to get a rise out of her. He would love nothing more than knowing he could still affect her this way. That was what cinched it.
"Sure." She said, nonchalantly, leaning back in her chair and propping her feet up on one of the table's unoccupied chairs. She unscrewed the lid from her water bottle and took another sip. "That must be it." She took a long sip of water and looked at the DJ still up on the stage.
Logan leaned forward when she did, ready to take whatever she had coming at him and giving it back, but then she stopped herself. Which only served to piss him off much, much, much more. So she was going to just brush it off, right? Brush it off like she did everything else and put it into a box where she didn't have to deal with it, or him, ever again. "Really?" He asked her, that dark look in his eyes that meant there was about to be a reckoning. Then abruptly he got to his feet. "You know, this place is boring. We should really liven it up, don't you think?" Logan was feeling reckless, and that never equaled good, so when he tore away from the table and went to the DJ, Veronica would have a limited amount of time to prepare herself.
He jumped up onto the karaoke stage with a confident swagger, smiling widely to the slightly tipsy audience. "Hello everybody, let's make some freaking noise already, yeah?" They responded with enthusiasm. Crowds liked getting riled up. "Now I'm going to need your help at some point in this song, but I'll warn you when, okay?" Logan flashed Veronica the peace sign. Ironically of course, since this was more like a declaration of war. The music started and the few people who recognized the song started to cheer, while Logan picked up the mic.
"I wake up every evening, with a big smile on my face, and it never feels out of place. And you're probably still working at a 9 to 5 pace, I wonder how bad that tastes." Logan wasn't a talented singer but he didn't hurt ears at least. It was his presence that gave the illusion he was good, as if just because he believed it everyone had to as well. Plus the song, Gives You Hell, required more attitude than talent. And attitude? He had in abundance. "When you see my face hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell. When you walk my way hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell. Now where's your picket fence, love? And where's that shiny car? And did it ever get you far? You never seemed so sense, love, I've never seen you fall so hard, do you know where you are?" There was no mistaking that he was making a point, considering his eyes never left where Veronica was sitting, and even in song his words apparently could drip with sarcasm.
Veronica knew she had gotten to him. She didn't even have to look at him to know it. She was still staring straight ahead at the stage, but she could practically feel his anger. She savored her victory for a brief moment, before she heard the danger in his tone. Really? She turned her head and saw that look in his eye. Her stomach plummeted to somewhere around the floor when he stood up and made his way toward the stage.
Feeling sick, Veronica pulled her legs off the chair, and they landed on the floor with a heavy thud. She knew she should leave, but her limbs didn't want to move. Besides, she wouldn't give Logan the satisfaction of seeing her leave. She watched him carefully as he jumped up on the stage and started addressing the audience. They responded. Of course they did. Logan could charm a rampaging bull if he wanted too. He looked back in her direction, holding up a peace sign, and she gripped her water bottle tighter. Whatever was about to happen was not going to be pretty.
The music started up. A song Veronica wasn't familiar with. She waited, listening to see just what it was that Logan was going to say. By the time he got to the chorus, his point was coming across loud and clear. His eyes never left her, and he had that infuriating smirk plastered across his face. Some of the bar's less drunken patrons were picking up on Logan's not so subtle undertones. She could see them glance back to where she sat. Her heart rate increased, she felt queasy. She wanted to scream, burst into tears, and kick his ass all at once. Logan Echolls had humiliated her a lot over the years, a lot, but this took the cake. Veronica swallowed with some difficulty, and forced herself to breathe normally. She would not let him get to her. She would not let him get to her. God damnit, he was getting to her.
But he certainly had her attention now, didn't he? "And truth be told I miss you ...." There was a moment then. A real flicker in Logan's face and eyes that showed he might understand this was a bad move and that he probably would regret it. It wasn't the first or the last time he'd let his impulses get away from him, but he was standing up there and she was watching, and his expression hardened all over again. "And truth be told I'm lying." The last word was practically bit out at her.
"When you see my face hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell. When you walk my way hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell. If you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well." He thought of Piz and smirked. "Then he's a fool, you're just as well, hope it gives you hell. I hope it gives you hell." As the music played a little part, Logan strutted on the stage although it looked more like a lion pacing in its cage, and the crowd applauded. "Tomorrow you'll be thinking to yourself, yeah, where did it all go wrong? But the list goes on and on. And truth be told I miss you. And truth be told I'm lying."
The chorus came again and it really didn't help that people were laughing and dancing. Sure some of them realized that he was singing in to someone in particular, but most people just liked the song and/or had been through a few break ups of their own. Very few people missed his pointed look during the upcoming part though. Considering he may have been pointing. "Now you'll never see, what you've done to me, you can take back your memories, they're no good to me." The Fab Four, the first time we kissed. "And here's all your lies, you can look me in the eyes, with that sad, sad look that you wear so well." He pointed to her eyes and then to him at that particular line. "Alright, everybody sing the chorus with me!"
Logan clapped his hands and the bar actually listened to him. In time with the music almost everyone went along with it and started singing the chorus. There was clapping along with him, swaying, and a whole lot of camaraderie. It was just unfortunately pointed at Veronica, whether the innocents in the bar knew it or not. His smile was wicked as he joined in at the end. "When you hear this song and you sing along, well you'll never tell. And you're the fool, I'm just as well, hope it gives you hell. When you hear this song I hope that it will give you hell. You can sing along, I hope that it puts you through hell!" With a flourish, Logan put the mic away and bowed low to loud, bawdy applause. He blew kisses at everyone and came off the stage, getting high fives as he passed. His smile to her clearly said well? Ignore that.
Veronica was still doing her best to hold it together, but it was getting exceedingly more difficult. Her heart skittered to a stop when she first heard him sing the lyric, "truth be told, I miss you." The look on his face, she thought she could see remorse there for just a second. It made her think that maybe they could come out of this relatively unscathed. But then that look was gone, replaced with the hardened, cynical grin that had served him so well over the years. "And truth be told, I'm lying." Her chest ached so much, she started to panic, before she realized it was because she was no longer breathing. She sucked in a lungful of air, but the pain didn't go away. Just shifted to the dull ache of of heartbreak that frequently accompanied loving Logan Echolls.
She sat there, refusing to move, refusing to look away from him as he continued. She thought maybe she was going to make it. Until the audience started singing along. Angry tears filled her eyes, and she clenched her teeth to try and hold back the sob that was growing in the back of her throat. How could he do this to her? She knew he had a dark side, but this was so beyond the pale of anything he'd done to her before. She'd been right to end things with him. Whatever he said, he couldn't really love her if he could do this to her. Could he? No. That strengthened her resolve. She swallowed the lump, and took a shaky breath, still feeling the tears swimming in her eyes.
She stood up as he made his way down from the stage. A few of the audience members who had realized there was more going on between them were watching closely. Veronica glowered at him as he neared her, still smiling and high fiving the other patrons. "Quite the crowd pleaser, aren't you?" She snapped. "Tough act to follow." She blinked back the last of her tears. "But someone's got to do it." She purposely brushed past him on her way up to the stage.
She leaned forward to say something to the DJ before stepping up to the mic that Logan had just vacated. She quashed the urge to pull it from the stand and hurl it in the general direction of his head. "Let's give it up for Logan, guys!" She said, her voice might have sounded enthusiastic to anyone who didn't know her, but those familiar with Veronica would he able to hear the bite in her words, and see the hard edge to her smile. "Who wouldn't want to hit that, am I right?" She held up her fingers in an OK symbol while a few of the girls in the audience called out their appreciation. "It's a good thing he loves sleeping around so much." She turned and gave him a pointed look.
She let her gaze linger on him for a moment, before turning it back to the audience. "To breakups." She said, as the music began playing. "Here's the thing. We started out friends, it was cool, but it was all pretend. Yeah, yeah. Since you been gone. You're dedicated, you took your time. It wasn't long before I called you mine." Just as he had done to her, Veronica wouldn't take her eyes off him while she sang. Her voice was much better than his, and there was a serious amount of anger fueling the lyrics in that moment. She could see the audience members looking back at him now.
"But since you been gone, I can breathe for the first time! I'm so moving on, yeah, yeah." She moved her body in time with the music, emotion clearly evident on her face. "Thanks to you, now I get what I want. Since you been gone."
She adjusted her grip on the microphone and licked her lips as she watched him. The spotlight on the stage warming her already flushed skin. She pulled of the light jacket she had been wearing, revealing the tank top she had on underneath. She tossed it to the side of the stage, one of the more drunken men in the audience whistled. Veronica didn't alter her gaze for a second. "How can I put it, you put me on. I even fell for that stupid love song." She raised an eyebrow at him. "Yeah, yeah. Since you been gone. How come I never hear you say, I just wanna be with you? Guess you never felt that way."
She burst into another round of the chorus. Her blond hair swinging around her shoulders as she sang. Venting every painful memory she had of their time together. She wanted to hurt him as much as he hurt her. An eye for an eye. He had started it.
Logan knew that he was playing with fire and there were only a few ways that this could go. It was all destructive, of course, but he'd really been hoping that Veronica would fight back. And obviously his girl wasn't going to let him down. He passed by her and saw that look in her eyes, and he also saw the shimmer of unshed tears that he had caused. It gave him pause and once again that look crossed his face, uncertain and remorseful and ready to apologize, but by then it was far too late. And he was tired of apologizing and bending and acting like he was the only person to make mistakes in their entire relationship.
"By all means, sugar plum, teach me a lesson." Logan gestured grandly for her to take the stage, almost as if it was with his permission, like she needed that. He was aware that this was going to hurt, and that he had no one to blame but himself. When he got back to their table he pretty much chugged the rest of the beer, and grabbed a waitress quickly by the arm. "Scotch. Now. Fast. I'll pay double." The empty glass was given to her thoughtlessly, and he didn't bother to take a seat. He stood in full sight of her and everyone else, a sign that he wasn't cowed by her or their very public lover's spat going on.
He gave a capricious smile when she spoke to their audience, the waitress hurrying over with his drink and he snatched it out of her hand, giving her a fifty without even looking. The sleeping around comment had him shrugging 'bashfully,' and the men snorted with laughter. And when she said 'to break ups,' Logan was the first to toast it with his scotch. The crowd could feel it. Whatever was going on, this was going to be better than a reality TV show for them. Even the staff working there seemed to be paying attention now, wondering just how eventful this Friday night was going to be.
He knew the song. Oh angry teeny boppers. Logan grimaced and met her eyes squarely while she sang. As angry as he was, he could still appreciate how she looked up there. Angry, flushed, determined, and completely hot. The more she sang the less cold he was, warming because of his rising temper and enjoying the feel of it. It'd been weeks that Logan kept a short leash on himself, that he didn't allow anything to actually be felt just in case it bothered her or her precious pointless boyfriend. It felt good to give up on that now. He was done holding back, and apparently now so was she.
The whistle from the audience caused his focus on her to wane briefly, his head whipping around in that direction, but he couldn't catch who it was. Even now, when hate was pouring at one another, Logan wouldn't stand for that toward Veronica. Not if the man wanted to be able to walk. Downing his drink with one easy tip back of his head, Logan set it down and let it be for now. When she looked at him, Logan spread out his arms, smirking, and gestured with his hands from her to him. Come on. Is that all you got? he was saying. He wanted more. He wanted to drown in it.
Veronica's chest rose and fell heavily. She could feel her blood pumping through her veins. Anger, adrenaline, both most likely. She supposed there was some rational part of her brain that was telling her she was being stupid. That she was giving into his mind games, and doing exactly what he wanted. But if there was? She wasn't listening. All she cared about was getting that stupid superior smirk off his face, and making him feel as awful as he had made her feel.
Pushing her hair out of her eyes, she sucked in a deep breath and fit the microphone back into its stand. "You had your chance, you blew it." She hurled the lyrics at him. Her own personal jabs. Madison Sinclair her eyes accused him. She was practically snarling now. "Out of sight, out of mind. Shut your mouth I just can't take it, again and again and again!" Her arms above her head, hands tangling in her hair. At the last words, she threw her arms out, and then let them drop back down to her sides. She looked at him, waves of blond hair falling around her face.
She hadn't been paying much attention to the other audience members. Her focus was too intently zeroed in on the subject of her song. But as the music played for just a moment, she looked around at them. Almost everyone had figured out there was something else going on here. Even the bar's drunkest members couldn't miss their display. She and Logan never really were the subtle types. Veronica smiled at them. She could be charming too when she wanted. Logan wasn't the only one who could have them eating out of his hand. As the music revved back up and she burst into another round of the chorus, most of the women in the audience joined in with her. Veronica grabbed a hold of the mic stand and swung her hips in time with the music.
"Thanks to you!" The girls in the audience sang, and Veronica echoed them, just a moment later. "Thanks to you." She pointed at Logan.
"Now I get!" They continued.
"Now I get."
"I get what I want." All their voices joined together, filling the room. She looked at Logan and gave him another angry glare. And it's not you. She ran her fingers down the skin that her v-necked tank top revealed, doing her best to taunt him with what he couldn't have.
"You should know, that I get what I want. Since you been gone. Since you been gone. Since you been gone."
The music trailed off and the song ended, Veronica still standing behind the mic as the girls clapped and the guys looked at her flushed skin and tousled hair appreciatively.The DJ looked slightly uncomfortable as he handed Veronica her jacket back. Veronica tried to give him a look to tell him she was sorry, but she was still too riled up to think clearly. She took the jacket and made her way off the stage. There were no blown kisses or high fives, but there were a lot of staring eyes. Veronica walked past Logan and up to the bar.
It hurt, of course it hurt, but it always hurt. And if the wonderful feeling of rage wasn't cushioning most of the blow, he'd probably be drinking into a black out tonight. Who knows. The night was young. Logan still could do that. Public humiliation didn't bother him like it bothered Veronica. He had that natural charisma of a leader, the type that knew that reacting to their looks with anything other than indifference would spur them on. But he didn't look shaken, and any of the singing women that looked bitterly his way was met with a charming, suggestive smile. Yeah, on the outside, he was untouched and the jackass she wanted to be. On the inside, he was starting to realize what kind of ugly thoughts could drive his mother to jump off a bridge.
There was a classic men versus women fight apparently going on, since the men had been hooting for him and the women were singing with Veronica. It would've been hilarious if he found anything funny now. He gave a sarcastic golf clap after her song and then watched her walk by him, swallowing hard and closing his eyes momentarily. Trying to gather the strength from somewhere to not make it worse, but honestly? What was worse at this point? Everyone was watching them, and he got what he wanted. Her undivided attention.
Logan turned and followed her to the bar, watching as one of the admiring male audience started to talk to her, and he slammed a hand down on the bar between them. "Sorry man, she's already taken. By a very sweet small town music lover who will be dedicating love songs to her from his garage in ten years or so." Dark eyes narrowed at the other guy and there was no mistaking the warning in them. He backed down without a word and left them be, Logan turning to face Veronica.
"You know that little song of yours, it really wasn't suiting. Because I'm fairly certain the only person in our relationship that ever said I just want to be with you would be me. Over and over again. Oh, and what was the other thing ...." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully and then snapped fingers. "That's right, I love you. Yeah you weren't fond of saying that. Me? I said it all the time, just hoping that once, once you'd say it back and mean it." Logan laughed bitterly. "Tell me, do you say it to him? Does he know what you say to me? I'm guessing not."
Veronica gripped the edge of the bar tightly. The bartender had made a move toward her when she first approached, but he stopped after Logan's alpha-male show of dominance toward the other guy. She took a deep breath and did her best to swallow the rage that was building. She turned to face him, her face defiant as she tilted her chin up and met his gaze.
"What do you want, Logan? An entire bar staring at us while we have the same argument we always have?" She gestured to the people who were sitting around watching them. "Congratulations. Here we are. That's me. That cold hearted bitch, Veronica Mars. Couldn't love Logan Echolls the way he wanted me too." She folded her arms across her chest, searching for any sort of barrier between the two of them. "I didn't matter that I let you in more than anyone." She clenched her teeth together, her words bitter and angry. "Because I couldn't say "I love you" enough." She could feel the tears building again, and blinked furiously to try and clear them.
"Look around us, Logan." She said, quieter this time. Calmer. She leaned toward him. "Look at what you just did to me, and ask me why I don't come running back. And don't you dare give me that 'Love is never easy' bullshit line of yours. There is a difference between that, and just being cruel. Which side of the line do you think you fall on tonight?"
"You couldn't say I love you at all. I had to practically drag it out of you." As far as Logan was concerned, there was no one else around but the two of them. He didn't care if they were talking in public or in private, because it was the same thing to him. As long as they were talking. Even if she hated him, she was saying something and not just pretending that it didn't exist. "I'm cruel? I'm cruel." Logan rolled his eyes and pressed his back up against the bar. "That's hilarious."
Dark eyes were focused one hundred percent on her. "Remember when we first got here. You told me you needed me. You said of everyone you'd want to be trapped with, it would be me." There was emotion in his voice now, leaning closer to her. "Then the second he shows up, I'm nothing more than a pebble in your shoe. It's Duncan all over again. Maybe I'm tired of being second best. Maybe I'm tired of you putting me on the side lines, waiting for just a scrap of your attention, while you play happy little homemaker for one of them." Logan sniffed and moved around to the other side of her, always in motion, needing that distraction. "Duncan hurt you too. He lied to you. But if he showed up here, I wouldn't just be second choice, I'd be third. Do you have any idea how that feels?"
"Maybe I couldn't say I love you as much as you needed me to," she spat at him. "But that doesn't mean that I didn't feel it. God, Logan!" She'd given up on any pretense of keeping this argument even the slightest bit dignified. They were going to be lucky if the owner didn't get security to escort them out. She pressed her lips together, and turned her face away as she struggled not to cry. "You don't get it, do you? He's the second choice. Not you." She shoved him away angrily. She couldn't stand the vulnerability that was creeping into her voice, not with him that close. She needed him away from her.
"I could never love him the way I loved you!" She was crying now. There was no hiding it, so she didn't attempt too. The tears actually helped. It was a release. She'd been holding everything in for so long. Trying to be smart. Trying to be strong. The tears made her braver. They made her more willing to be honest. Even if being honest meant yelling at Logan in front of a bar full of spectators. "I can't love anyone like that anymore. Because it hurts too much."
Now the spectators were getting uncomfortable with how real the conversation was getting. It was one thing to see a karaoke battle between exes and a whole different thing to hear the pain and desolation the two of them were feeling. Who hadn't been there? They were given a little more privacy because of that, although in a crowded bar that wasn't saying much. When she shoved him he went back a step, and then was back close to her a moment later, putting his hands on her arms.
"Then stop pushing me away. Jesus, Veronica, we always end back up here, don't you think it's for a reason?" Logan hated when she cried, especially when he was the reason she was crying, but it wasn't the first time. He knew he hurt her. She hurt him. He'd cried because of her, which she knew, although he tried just as hard to pretend otherwise. "You hurt me and I hurt you and it's a vicious cycle, but we also can't get over it either. I can't get over you. I don't want to, okay?" It was a really good thing Logan didn't care about anyone else, because he was getting to the desperation place, and what could be really pathetic to the outside. "I'll do anything, anything, if you'll just give it another shot with me. I'll quit drinking, I'll tear up the credit card and live as a pauper." He was so dramatic. "I don't care, just tell me what it'll take!"
Veronica tried to shrug off Logan's hands, tried to get away from him, because she could feel her resolve slipping away. But despite her struggle, he wouldn't let her get away from him, and she stopped. Which, she knew meant that she didn't really want to get away from him. There were few things that stopped Veronica Mars when she really wanted something. Her body drooped. She was tired. Tired of pitting her emotions against her brain. It didn't matter how many sound arguments she had about why Logan was bad for her, and how she'd only end up hurting more. Her heart, her soul still ached for him. He was right. They would never get over it. And she wasn't sure if she could pretend otherwise anymore.
She curled up against his chest, crying. Don't hurt me anymore. She wanted to tell him. I won't survive it again. She could be dramatic too. But she was less prone to public declarations than he was. Her face was still pressed against his shirt, she tried to get herself under control before speaking again. She'd forgotten how safe she could feel in his arms. She missed it. Veronica took a long moment and a few deep breaths before taking a step back, wiping her tears away with her fingertips. "I know you can be a good guy, Logan." She said quietly. "I've seen it. That's the guy that I'm in love with. Just please listen to him a little more often so we don't keep ending up in this ridiculous situations."
A lot of people might have thought that for Logan the chase was half the fun, but it wasn't. He hated the chase. For all his swagger and his attitude, in his heart Logan liked settling down with one girl. The lack of love his whole life made him starved for it now, and one night stands didn't love him. Well. Maybe they did. But he wasn't about the chase and then he got bored once he won. Being with Veronica was what he endured the chase for. And he'd been running after her for years.
When she curled up close to him he released her arms and moved hands around her, holding her while she cried. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry...." he chanted quietly to her, rubbing soothing circles against her back. Logan was sorry that about a great many of things, but he wasn't sorry that they were talking instead of dancing around their issues. They'd been doing it long enough. When she stepped away his heart leaped, thinking despite all of this she may still refuse to acknowledge the truth about them. He felt cold, wondering how he could possibly rebound. Any chance at them trying to be friends was probably killed by his words, so it was all or nothing at this point.
At her words he couldn't help but huff a half-laugh. "If I listened to him all the time, I never would get anywhere with you. He's a softie." Logan lifted a hand to cup her cheek, leaning in close to her so their noses barely touched. "Is that you saying okay? That we can try again?"
Veronica sniffed and looked down at the ground, the edges of her mouth turned up in a small, but wary, smile. There's no going back now, Veronica. She told herself. You're here. No second guessing. Just tell him how you feel.
His hand was on her cheek, and she let him lift her face back up so that they were eye to eye. She pressed her forehead against his, and closed her eyes, taking one last moment before giving in. "Yes." She said quietly, nodding. "Yes."
Logan knew there was more to work out and say between them, a lot more, and maybe they'd finally be able to actually do it. But despite all that he really couldn't resist taking this moment to swoop down and kiss her. He thought once that waiting an hour to kiss Veronica Mars was excruciatingly long, but this had been months. Both hands cradled her face as he kissed her deeply, savoring the familiar taste and feel of the woman he'd loved and lost ... and loved again.
Like in some bad romantic comedy, the crowd that was still paying attention at the bar started to applaud, because damn those two put on some kind of a show. Between the karaoke battle, the tearful screaming, and now that kiss, it was like being at the theater. Logan broke away from her only because he was laughing, turning his head around to look at the others. With a grin at her he lifted that special unlimited credit card. "Drinks for everyone in this fine establishment. On me!"