Professor Remus J. Lupin (galarusblaidd) wrote in breaking_point, @ 2010-02-01 08:15:00 |
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Entry tags: | *complete, 2025 02, character: regulus black, character: remus lupin |
RP: Remus/Regulus
Who: Remus Lupin and Regulus Black
Where: Hogwarts, Remus' Quarters
When: Monday, 1 February, 2025, morning
Rating/Warnings:
Summary: Remus gets a break-through.
The sun wasn't quite up yet, cold winter's dawn only just filtering in through the windows in the sitting room as Remus closed the bedroom door quietly behind him. It had been several days since he'd been up for his usual pre-dawn training, instead giving in to sleepy protests for another couple hours in bed. Not that he minded, although he might have to re-evaluate his schedule soon.
For now, he watched the sunrise for a moment or two through the window then cast a second layer of silencing charms around the sitting room. He already kept silencing and scent-blocking spells around each individual room -- walls, floor, ceiling -- as well as charms to keep rodents away in addition to the wards he kept on the door to his quarters. He might be trying to re-establish friendship with Peter on some level, but he couldn't risk trusting him yet and Remus of all people in the castle knew exactly how many places he could get in his animagus form.
The Marauders' Map was proof enough of that!
But, now he cast secondary silencing spells in the sitting room so as not to disturb the still-sleeping man in the bedroom. He'd have to fit his hand-to-hand practice in later in the day. Spellwork would have less chance of waking anyone. Pushing the table in the middle of the room out of the way, he knelt in the centre of the room, knees slightly splayed for balance.
Closing his eyes, Remus' breathing slowed, growing deep and even as he let the stillness of the room drop him into a meditative trance. Though his meditations hadn't been as focused as the one that had changed his perspective on his own magic so greatly, Remus had made it a practice to try and just brush that inner well of power each morning. He wondered if it had been that he'd truly been seeking in Eastern Europe, not the Dark Arts, but how to use the web of light and dark he already possessed.
It was becoming easier to accept the hunger and bloodlust on the surface, blocking access to that web, though he often still recoiled from it as he did that morning. Memories of Saturday morning's attack and a subtle sense of self-revulsion that came with it were too close.
Taking a deep breath, he came up a level, releasing the brief touch on his inner beast and focusing more on his surroundings. Keeping his eyes closed, his mind replayed the last week, skipping the horrors and lingering on the moments of peace and contentment that had been sprinkled throughout. It was those moments of calm, snapshots of happiness, he sought now.
Steady progress had been made in weeks since he'd begun working on the Patronus charm. While he'd given up on trying to recapture the man he'd been at thirty-eight, he still wished to push his limits on that spell. It was too useful, would be too necessary in the current conflicts, for him to continue at the level his was currently at. He knew he had the power to cast it. What he needed was to find the right memory to fuel it.
The moment when he'd realised he and Regulus were truly going to be together was a likely start and he brought that moment to mind, visualising it as it happened in that very room. It wasn't difficult to remember even the tiny details -- grey eyes meeting his, that soft smile, the warmth that had seemed to overflow inside Remus and spill over to bathe everything in a new brightened outlook. Holding that feeling in his mind and heart, he opened his eyes and cast.
Expecto Patronum
The usual misty light shot from his wand tip, swirling hypnotically for a moment before coalescing into a more solid form. Though still not quite recognisable, there was something distinctly familiar in the form, something less quadruped-amorphous and more evolved. Remus held the spell a moment longer before dismissing it and trying again.
With the same memory and same results.
A third time yielded the same.
Biting his lower lip absently, Remus closed his eyes and returned to the memory, feeling it again as though the first time, knowing he'd never been happier than in that moment.
But what of after? Casting his mind forward in time, his thoughts settled on the morning after the Full Moon, not the direct aftermath of the battle. No, the quiet moments after returning to the school, the feeling of being able to trust and let himself be vulnerable, knowing he was safe with Regulus there. It was a softer memory, a deeper contentment than the rush of happiness. Yet, he'd been more profoundly affected by that quiet moment than the dizzying rush.
Barely opening his eyes first, he cast the spell again and this time he felt the difference, felt the warmth flow from inside him through his wand to burst into form.
Of course, he promptly lost that form when his concentration slipped because of his own laughter. While he'd done it, finally, the corporeal shape his Patronus had taken surprised him. And, it shouldn't have.
It was what he was, after all!