NYE 2020 Who: CJ and Steve What: New Year’s Eve Where: Bellagio, Las Vegas When: NYE, 2020 (well before midnight) Ratings/Warnings: Low. But a warning for Tooth Rotting Fluff
The New Year’s Eve party at the Bellagio was the talk of Clark County. It had been years since CJ had actually celebrated it, his New Year’s routine usually entailed staying at home watching the celebrations on his TV, starting from Sydney and working all the way to New York and finally Las Vegas. For once he thought that it’d be good to get out, plus the money raised from the night would go to charity, why not go out and enjoy the night for once?
A few nights beforehand he sent Steve a text message NYE party @ Bellagio. If you can get a sitter, want to be my +1? It would be nice to see in the New Year with a friend, his best friend. A smile spread across his face when the response came back, he hoped it would be a good night out for the two of them.
The dress code was semi formal, so CJ dressed in a suit with a tie that he thought would match, he didn’t get to wear a tie that often, they thought it too formal for working in the library, so a button up shirt and occasionally a coat was his usual attire. It felt nice to get dressed up for once.
CJ had purchased a small white rose - a boutonniere - for Steve, but it was up to Steve if he wanted to wear it or not. He parked at the guest area of the apartment building, walked up to the Grant family’s apartment and knocked on the door.
It took a while to formulate a response to that text.
Christmas had left him with a lot of mixed feelings; they weren’t new, his perspective about them had changed. It had been almost four years since he and Lily had lost - he hadn’t had time since to do anything but take care of the girl and he didn’t make time to take care of himself or his own needs. Then things with CJ changed.
I think I can find someone, I’ll get back to you.
Of course his mother was chomping at the bit to see her granddaughter and Lily was equally as excited to be staying with her Juju and Poppy. It assured him that she was somewhere safe on a hectic holiday and thus had him accepting the invitation.
Steve didn’t own a formal outfit. Thank goodness it was a semi formal event. He sucked air through his teeth thumbing through the assortment of clothes hanging on the rack. At the back of the closet he found a suit - a black two piece number that was already pressed. While he felt like he could do better, this would do.
Shower, trim his facial hair, put on suit. Fingers knotted the tie expertly. It was like riding a bike, tying a tie. The double Windsor knot brought the ensemble together. The way his stomach was flipping was not doing him any favors.
Was there still time to cancel? Why was he nervous?
As the knock came Steve cursed silently at himself for being so worried. He went for the door, easing it open. Then he began to smile seeing CJ in the doorway, “Hey.”
There were butterflies in his stomach too, Christmas too had stirred up some strange emotions inside of CJ, ones that he hadn’t felt in a while. He still didn’t know why he had done it, why he had actually kissed Steve on that night under the mistletoe, but it was something he couldn’t take back now and he wasn’t sure he wanted to take it back either.
On the drive over he had taken off his coat and it was sitting neatly folded on the back seat, no need to get it creased more than he needed to. The weather wasn’t exactly cold that night, and his body felt a bit warmer than it probably should as well.
When Steve opened the door, CJ’s smile was wide. “Hey. Almost ready?” He asked, eyes taking in his friend’s appearance, Steve looked really dashing in his suit.
Suddenly the suit felt too tight. Steve took a deep breath - was he having an anxiety attack? He motioned for CJ to come in and swept back from the door. The door eased shut behind his friend, securing them both inside. “Yeah, pretty much.”
Steve made to pick up a few stray toys which Lily had stashed behind the couch pillows, making room for CJ to sit if he wanted to.
“I haven’t worn a suit in...years,” he laughed, tossing the stuffed toy and action figure into a nearby cloth box. “But yours looks nice.” Nice? Was that too vanilla? “Um, hot. You...look hot.”
The smile still hadn’t left his face as he walked into the apartment. Of course he didn’t mind Steve cleaning up a bit before they left for the night, he had done a bit at his own place, it was a good way to start the new year, with a slightly cleaner house.
He chuckled at Steve’s statement of having not worn a suit in years, “I know what you mean, I think the last time I wore one was for an orchestra performance and that was at least eighteen months ago.” It was probably the same suit as well.
A slight blush came to his cheeks when Steve complimented him, he didn’t think that he looked that nice, or ‘hot’. “So do you, black is really your color!”
“Thanks.” He meant it, even if it didn’t seem like it. Then Steve cleared his throat and nodded, “Ready when you are.” When it came to anything football or sports he exuded confidence, when it came to anything to do with relationships he was utter shit. CJ was going to have to be patient with him.
This party was one he’d heard about a lot; someone was talking about it at the grocery store in the next register over. Lily had asked about it, too.
But this shift in focus sounded like a good way to start the next year off. Casey would have wanted him to move on and find someone else that could take care of him considering he didn’t always take care of himself.
If the conversation wasn’t about books or music then CJ was just as bad, he could talk the house down about those topics, and then some. However, it turned out Steve wasn’t the only one who was pretty useless when it came to things like relationships, if his last few were any indication. But right now, neither of them could guess in which direction their friendship would be heading, only time would tell. That seemingly harmless kiss had actually changed everything.
The Bellagio was one of the best known casinos on the Strip, the party was bound to be packed, but at least they’d have each other’s company and not that of hundreds of other strangers.
He had only sat for a moment but he was back on his feet and his hand diving into his pocket to get his keys. “Got everything?” For the purpose of the evening CJ had a smaller, thinner wallet that just held his license, a few notes and his ATM card and his keys fitted snugly in his other pocket. His phone had stayed home, for once he didn’t want to get distracted by other means.
A pat down would be the response to the inquiry. Hands slipped down the front of his own coat, across hips of his slacks, checking diligently. Like CJ, Steve was not toting much. His phone would be taken in case of an emergency but otherwise he was good to go with that and his wallet. Living in Vegas taught you to pack light when you were going on.
Then he nodded briefly, offering a smile. “Yeah, I think I’m good.”
He knew if they didn’t get out of there quickly they were liable to not make it at all on account of nerves, or at least that was how Steve looked at it.
It only took a moment to get to the door and he held it open for CJ, locking up behind both of them when they were free from the apartment.
“How’d you hear about this thing anyway?”
Clearly it was the buzz of town but he was curious regardless.
There was a small nod when Steve mentioned he had everything, and he led the way out of the apartment and down towards his car.
"I heard people talking about it at my local coffee place." Came the answer, even out at Boulder City the party was still getting talked about, CJ knew that he might see people he knew but really it didn't matter if he did or not, Steve was all the company he'd need.
Once at his car CJ unlocked it and held the passenger side door open for his friend, such the gentleman.
He then closed it, walked around and got in the driver's side. At that moment he saw the rose standing out stark against his coat. "I almost forgot…" Reaching back he grabbed the rose and sat back in his seat, holding the flower out to Steve.
“Thanks,” Steve murmured. He slid into the passenger side seat and settled. It was odd being a rider and not a driver, but he supposed it made sense in the context since he was the plus one and all.
The flower surprised him. “It’s pretty,” he nodded, taking the flower out of the little clamshell container. Steve held it up and out to CJ. “Mind helping out? I’m no good at these things.” The boutineer from his wedding had been a disaster.
Nobody had ever been so thoughtful before besides Casey. It was oddly delightful.
CJ would have insisted on driving anyway as he didn't drink alcohol, not that he didn't trust Steve, he trusted his friend with his life. If Steve felt like having a beer or two he could without worrying about going over the limit.
There was a soft chuckle as he took the flower, nimble fingers sliding the stem of the rose through the hole in the lapel of Steve's coat like he had done this a thousand times before.
"There… hopefully it'll stay there for the rest of the night."
With the rose secured properly, Steve began to feel a bit more confident. He didn’t know why and the correlation felt strange but it was what it was regardless.
He had lived in this area for a long time and had never set foot in the Bellagio until that night. Lily loved the fountains, who didn’t? They watched frequently. Now he understood the appeal from the inner decor and the liveliness inside why it was so popular.
Blue eyes took in everything.
“This place is...big,” Steve commented absently, taken aback by the wonder of it all.
CJ had never stepped foot inside the Bellagio either, he loved the fountains too but that was about as far as he had ever gone. He wasn't a gambler and the annual library conventions were usually held in other locations.
The area that was holding the party was away from the main gambling floors and there was no real noise filtering through, it just looked like a regular ballroom.
"Huge." CJ agreed, it was bigger than he imagined, pictures really didn't do it any justice. He looked across at Steve. "Feel like something to eat, or just want to sit down for a while?" There was a buffet with lots of food as well as the silent auction and dance floor.
The question was a good one. Honestly he had no idea what he wanted to do. He wasn’t the fancy party type; he didn’t hate being there it would just take a little bit to get his bearings and settle. Steve had chaperoned enough school dances, too, to understand the dynamics. But then, this wasn’t a prom or a winter festival dance.
“Wow.” A deep exhale as he looked around. A hand would lift, cup CJ’s arm so they didn’t get separated, and he floated along through the swarm of equally nice dressed people.
“I have no idea where to start.” Steve laughed, seeming a bit helpless with all of it. Then he sighed. “How about we start at the buffet, do some browsing. If there’s anything good we sit and eat, later we can work it off dancing. Yeah?”
He turned to look at CJ for approval.
It sounded like a great idea, walk around for a moment to get their bearings before sitting down and eating. CJ felt just as lost as Steve did, conversation halls weren't as beautifully decorated and it was all in streamers and 2021 signs hanging up.
When Steve's arm cupped his, CJ returned the touch with a pat of the hand, the last thing either of them needed was to lose the other in amongst the crowd, especially as CJ's phone was at home.
"Sounds like a great idea to me. After we eat I'd like to have a look at the auction items, though I think most will definitely be out of my price range." He said with a chuckle, wouldn't hurt to make a bid on a few things though he knew he'd never win anything.
A glance would be cast in the direction of the long tables of auctioned items. It was for charity, why not at least bid a little even if you didn’t win? But then, wasn’t that the catch of Vegas? Steve studied the crowd in the distance, nodded, and turned back to CJ. “Okay, yeah. That sounds like a way better idea.”
With a destination in mind, Steve took charge and led the way. Gently, he kept hold of CJ. Like a captain of a ship he navigated through the sea of warm bodies to the stretched expanse of buffet style food.
He got in line behind a young lady who didn’t even look old enough to be in a casino in the first place, and then he looked down at his shoes for a moment.
CJ let himself get guided from where they were standing towards the line for the buffet, from this distance he could see some of the food as well as smell it, typical casino buffet food but it'd fill them up, couldn't expect 5 star gourmet food for $25 a ticket.
"Thanks for coming out with me tonight, I don't know if I could handle this by myself." He'd probably have a panic attack and end up in the corner with the amount of people around them.
The line moved slowly, but it did allow them to talk to each other before they actually got to the food.
“I wanted to,” he began, lifting his head up. He had. Honestly he had wanted to confirm right away but then Lily needed looking after. He was glad that it all worked out though. “I don’t really do stuff like this but it’s kind of nice, you know? Like in a different way.”
Another look around. He couldn’t help but be suspicious that everyone else knew he didn’t belong there. An imposter. Would they figure it out?
He moved his hand from CJ’s forearm and reached for the man’s hand instead, taking it gently.
"I know exactly what you mean, I would've stayed home and fallen asleep in front of the TV before it even got near midnight." That was his usual routine, maybe a quick phone call to his parents. "We're actually adulting." He chuckled.
They were both imposters in a place like this, although everyone else seemed to be wrapped up in their own little world, the young lady in front of them taking a selfie.
When Steve's hand slid into his, there was a small smile and he gave a little squeeze, they'd have to let the other go when they got to the head of the line but they could enjoy it for this moment at least.
“Me too,” he admitted, grinning. He would’ve passed out even before Lily, though any sleep was good sleep when you could get it. “This isn’t adulting, there aren’t responsibilities or obnoxious obstacles,” he added, teasing lightly.
His fingers gripped lightly, squeezed, and he held on until it was their turn.
Steve slipped a plate from around selfie-girl, handing it to CJ. “You first. I’m afraid to get caught in one of those little pictures on that girl's phone,” he whispered, ducking behind his friend.
"You're right, but we have gotten all dressed up and will be staying up past our usual bedtime." He would've stayed in his pyjamas otherwise, probably with a tub of Ben and Jerry's. "We're like a pair of rebellious teens."
CJ took the lead. "She should stop in a moment, you can't get food from a buffet with one hand." He gave Steve a wink over his shoulder, amused that he was shielding his friend from selfie-girl.
Sure enough she stopped moments after he spoke and she piled her plate high with the salads, CJ put a bit of everything on his plate, that was the great thing about buffets, could always come back for more.
Dangerous. That was dangerous and Steve only laughed. Rebellious teenagers. CJ wasn’t wrong in that statement, this absolutely went against everything but he found that he enjoyed it more than he thought he would.
Taking a plate for himself, he did the trendy thing and put a bit of everything onto the once pristine dish. A bit of flat wear for them both and Steve looked for a table.
“There’s one,” he said aloud, mostly to himself, gesturing with his plate at a couple of vacant chairs at a semi-empty cloth covered table.
The centerpieces matched the decor yet they were obviously catering to the holiday event.
Steve pulled a chair out for CJ, and then sat down next to him.
Not that CJ was ever the rebellious teen, the most outrageous thing he had ever done was ‘running away from home’ when he was thirteen, that had lasted a while 13 hours before he got hungry and was covered in mosquito bites.
Although some of the centrepieces were obviously left over from Christmas, the new helium filled balloons and Happy New Year glitter stated the event that they were there for. The tabletop sized tree at CJ’s place had already gone back into its box, ready for the next Christmas.
He sat down and waited for Steve to sit down before he started on sampling his meal.
Bite after small bite would be taken. He could put away food if he wanted to. Being athletic meant he needed more than most others to sustain but he managed to not gobble everything on the plate. The food wasn’t half bad for a cheap, casino meal.
Waitresses wandered around with trays of drinks, took orders, picked up discarded and abandoned utensils or dishes.
“Oh, just water is fine,” Steve said to one waitress. He looked at CJ.
He’d have to agree, for a mass produced casino meal it wasn’t too bad, he had eaten worse meals at fancier restaurants over the years. The Chinese style chicken was a bit dry, but it was probably deep fried so he wasn’t exactly shocked about that, the slightly spicy beef dish that he had picked up was quite nice, he’d definitely go back for some more of that.
“Water for me too, please.” CJ added when the waitress asked them about drinks, another small smile given to Steve as she left the table.
“Have you tried this beef thing?” He asked, indicating one of the piles of food on his plate. “Got a bit of a bite to it.”
Steve thanked the waitress and then looked at the pile of beef entree. He shook his head. “I don’t think I got any of that.” A back and forth between CJ’s plate and his own before he reached over with his fork, pronging a bite.
“Not bad,” he agreed, chewing.
Their waters arrived. He felt like a total idiot drinking water but just then he didn’t care.
“I might have to get some of that next go around.”
“Better than this attempt at Honey Chicken.” CJ said, nose screwing up a bit, pushing it to the edge of his plate. He still had a bit to try before he’d go back for seconds.
While Steve might feel like an idiot drinking just water while out, it was normal for him, often he’d get a Coke or lemonade, but he didn't think that either of them would go well with what he was eating, so water it would be.
It didn’t take too much longer to clear most of his plate, which was cleared away promptly by a waitress; they weren’t in any rush so he could sit there for a while, letting what he had just eaten settle before adding more. “Is Lily still on that Christmas rush?” He asked.
“You know that she is,” he confirmed.
Steve finished what was on his own plate, letting it get whisked away by a waitress. He would go back for more but letting things settle seemed like a good idea.
He turned to look at CJ. “She loves that animal you got her. She always does.” An animal, a book, whatever it was CJ brought was always a hit with the girl.
The noise around wasn’t so bad; he found he could concentrate and focus while he spoke. Thank goodness it wasn’t as loud as a club in here.
Watching Lily growing up had given him a new appreciation for Christmas, one that he hadn’t had since he was child himself, seeing the smiles and looks of surprise as each present was opened. CJ had called his mother to let her know that the toy Quoll that she had sent in the last care package was a hit, as was the new picture book.
“Teddy bears get so boring, and Australia is just full of crazy animals.” A sip of his water, they made more toys now than they had as a kid, although sometimes the quality wasn’t as high as back then, but Lily seemed to love them nonetheless.
“Ready to go back to work on Monday?” Although the break was welcomed, CJ was looking forward to getting back to work.
Surprisingly, he found his answer to be in the positive. Playing football and getting paid? Dream job. “Yeah. I’m ready. I like being on a break but I start to go crazy after a while.” He couldn’t be the type of parent who stayed at home, it just wasn’t in him.
He looked over a shoulder at the auction tables, then back at CJ. “Want to see what’s up over there? Work off some of the food?” They could always come back for more.
His knee wasn’t bothering him too badly, and being active sounded better than sitting around watching everyone else.
CJ was also glad to be getting back to work, he missed the books and the routine more than anything. There was only so much that could be done around the house before things got a bit boring, a new book at Christmas had held his attention for a few days but it was now on the shelf with the rest of them. Even his pet Russian tortoise - Dimitri - was in hibernation and not much company.
He looked behind him at the tables. “Yes, and yes. Maybe there won’t be as much of a line when we get hungry again.”
Standing up he offered Steve his hand and a smile. “Lead the way.”
He took that hand, standing up. A moment to push in the chairs and then he guided his friend through the crowd. It was easy enough to navigate, he had mapped the way from the table where they’d eaten.
His pace began to slow, taking it a step at a time. “Oh look, a helicopter ride.” Not that he minded being in the air but he preferred the ground if he had to pick a direction.
Browsing, Steve took his time. All the while he kept hold of CJ’s hand.
“See anything good?”
A lot of the items that were up for auction CJ already knew would be way out of his price range, or they were just too snobby for a lonely librarian. There were a few things that caught his attention though.
“The hot air balloon ride sounds interesting, can’t say I’ve ever seen this place from above.” The only time he had ever flown into or out of the local airport it was night time and not exactly the most interesting of sights. “Though honestly, if they had one for dawn over the Grand Canyon, now that would be worth the money!”
CJ chuckled softly “I remember taking a mule down into the canyon when I first moved over, but that was over fifteen years ago. I should head up there again one day.” It was beautiful and vast and really a sight to behold.
“Never say never,” Steve replied.
The Grand Canyon was lovely. He hadn’t gone in quite a while, since before Lily was born. Maybe it was time to visit again, see the natural landscape. It was something to think about at least, for the future ahead.
He looked at the items on display. Like CJ, there wasn’t much he could afford or was really interested in but he browsed all the same.
“I prefer to keep my feet on the ground if I can.”
“We’re still young, plenty of time left to see the world.” He gave Steve a grin, not that he had any plans on seeing other parts of the world at the moment, not even heading back to Australia to see his family, there were too many skeletons in that closet he didn’t want to even think about opening. “Maybe even one day I’ll make it back to see my parents.”
CJ would continue to think about putting a bid on the balloon flight, they still had plenty of time before bids closed. “Anything else you want to look at? They’re not opening the dance floor til 9. We could have a look in the casino.”
Steve made a face. He didn’t want to wander in to the casino, while it sounded harmless who knew what trouble lurked around those loud machines. He didn’t trust himself. “No casino. Not today.” Nor did he want to start the new year off like that.
“I’m sure you’ll get back to see them eventually.” His own lived right here, it was easy to see them whenever he wanted so he tried to sympathize with CJ. It must have been hard being so far away but his friend never seemed to mind much.
Shaking his head, Steve squeezed CJ’s fingers lightly. “Besides you, no.”
Then they’d avoid the casino, he wasn’t about to push Steve into a situation that was uncomfortable for his friend and honestly, the thought of all those chimes and voices gave him a headache.
“One day I will, maybe during one of our summer holidays, but for now I’m happy here.” There was nothing back in Hervey Bay for him and he had made his life here. “The beaches are nothing like here, I’ll tell you that much.”
CJ glanced down at their hands, giving them a squeeze before looking back up at Steve. “You’re not bad to look at either.” He winked.
His travel was minimal. While he had aspirations to go places he never quite made it too far from home. Working had dominated the parts of his life not taken over by family. And then it had shifted into a small battle of time that wrestled each other to claim the title as most important.
“Thanks,” Steve laughed. The idea that someone thought he looked good brought a bit of color into his cheeks but he wanted to look good for CJ.
They found a few things to do until the dance floor opened. That was when the mood began to shift as the ambiance became a bit looser.
Steve kept hold of CJ, dodging a young woman who was dancing on her own who clearly had too much to drink.
CJ would openly admit that he wasn’t the best dancer in the world, he wasn’t the worst either but he still hoped he wouldn’t actually step on Steve’s toes out on the dance floor. He hadn’t looked around at other people during the evening so far, why would he when he had all the company that he wanted.
After dodging the rather tipsy lady and finding an empty place he gave Steve’s hand a little tug to stop him. “I think here will do us.” He said, his free hand flipping his hair back a bit, not that it was long enough to get into his eyes but still he wanted to make sure he was looking respectable.
“You lead, I’ll follow.”
Finding the music, he did just that.
They moved slowly together in time to the tunes. He kept one hand curled around CJ’s, the other politely settled as he led.
“I thought you weren’t good at dancing,” Steve chuckled. He could already hear the response, amused, as he turned those blues on CJ.
He wasn’t a great dancer either, but he’d learned enough with Lily to not trip over his own feet.
It took only moments to settle into the rhythm of the dance, one hand in Steve’s and the other resting on his friend’s shoulder as they moved to the music. Despite the crowd and noise around them CJ was focussed entirely on this moment.
“I’m not going to win any awards, but as long as I don’t step on your feet I call that a win.” His gaze turned to Steve’s and he smiled as he saw those eyes focusing on him, he felt like it was only the two of them.
“I think Lily’s lessons are paying off.” He joked, otherwise he might do something silly, like kiss Steve again.
“These shoes are old,” he assured his friend, smiling a bit. He had worn them years ago at his wedding, and a few times after on special occasions but they sat on the floor of the closet gathering dust most of the time. He wasn’t concerned for their well-being as much. Steve also wasn’t a wasteful person, but whatever the outcome he would roll with it.
Nodding in agreement, Steve brightened visibly. “Yeah, she really loves going to dance, and her instructor is really good with her.” They had a good connection, too, and Steve could trust the woman with Lily’s care. Lily would stay with her for a couple of years for more tuitledge.
“I swear that kid is teaching me things, these days.”
Old shoes or not, CJ didn't really want to step on Steve's feet, and so far there had been a few close calls, mainly because there were moments where he forgot that Steve was leading.
"She's a smart kid. They seem to suck in information like a sponge at that age." There was always a smile on his friend's face when Lily was mentioned, the way any doting father should be.
As the music continued to play CJ tilted his head forward, resting it on Steve's shoulder with a content little sigh as they continued to dance, oblivious to the rest of the room.
“No kidding,” he agreed. Lily was smarter than he was at times, she picked up on a lot of stuff faster than he realized which was another reason he had been avoiding relationships. He didn’t want the girl to feel like he was trying to replace her mother even though Lily didn’t really know Casey the way he had.
Steve continued to guide CJ around. The music changed, slowing into something easier to work with. The tune before had been slower but it had a bit of upbeat tone to it, this melody was designed for actual slow dancing and Steve obliged.
His own head tilted slightly, coming to rest gently against CJ’s.
Whatever the year ahead held, he hoped they had more moments like this and less worry, less unknown and monotony. The choices that loomed with the ticking of the minute hand were known, registered, and considered. And he found himself looking forward to them.
When the tempo changed and their dance slowed to match it CJ gave their joined hands a gentle squeeze as he felt Steve's head resting against his. Eyes closed and a small smile spread across his face.
He had never thought they would have moments like this, well not serious ones at least. They had danced before but that was in jest, all a bit of a joke and lighthearted fun at the time. This felt so much different than anything they had done before, they hadn't talked about Christmas but CJ was sure that Steve could feel that silent weight as much as he could.
They still had a few hours until midnight, maybe they could find somewhere away from the crowds to just sit and enjoy each other's company. When the song ended he lifted his head from Steve's shoulder. "Want to go for a walk outside?"
That pull back had Steve lifting his head. He looked at CJ, silent question hanging between them, finding relief in the next part. He let go of the other man. “Sure, that sounds nice.” While he was enjoying himself here, fresh air seemed like a dream.
Collecting CJ’s hand, Steve waited and let the other man lead. He followed easily along, staying close.
He had been avoiding Christmas. It wasn’t for any particular reason, though he felt as if the magic would lessen if they discussed it openly, like a birthday wish or something personal sought in a prayer to the man upstairs.
Although the pools would be closed by this hour, it was still somewhere outside that they could get some air and escape the noises of the ballroom and the people within.
Leading the way he walked Steve out of the ballroom, down a corridor or two until they came to a door that led out to the open area. They opened automatically and although it was cooler outside it wasn't exactly unpleasant.
A short stroll already had CJ feeling relaxed, the stresses of being in a crowd disappearing into the night air. His hand stayed in Steve's as they walked, eventually finding a bench where the two of them could sit and relax for a while.
Sitting down CJ smiled at his friend, bringing their hands up and pressing a kiss to the back of Steve's hand.
A deep breath would be taken once the cool evening air greeted them. He had always liked nature and being outside; while he wasn’t a hiker or camper, it was the simplistic ambiance of the world itself stripped bare that he looked for. His plan a few years ago was to move his family somewhere else, get an RV and travel the country.
He moved to sit down next to CJ.
The bench was cool beneath his clothes, he didn’t mind and found it interesting that the ballroom had been nearly scorching from the temperature of the place and the people inside.
As CJ’s mouth pressed on his skin, Steve turned and smiled. Blue eyes soaked in the neon, the stars, and held the light like a private galaxy bordered only by iris and pupil.
CJ was a hiker and camper, although he worked in Vegas he preferred the relative quietness of Boulder City, and the commute wasn't all that bad. The only time he lived in the city was when he was studying at UNLV, even then he had tried to get away as much as he could.
He held Steve's hand between both of his own, his body turned inwards just enough so he didn't have to keep turning his head.
This evening was much better than sitting at home, he was thankful that Steve had agreed to go with him.
"Not too tight?" He asked softly, glancing down at their hands before looking back up into Steve's eyes and holding their gaze.
“Not at all.” He shook his head at CJ, brushing the back of his friend’s hand with the pad of a thumb. The pressure was nice. It made him forget all of the tragedy and offered a small bit of hope for the future ahead.
Taking a chance, he leaned forward to connect their mouths. It felt good, nearly as good as the first time yet the first time was too brief. This was also brief, but not in the same context.
When the connection broke he leaned back with a bit of satisfaction. Steve could taste CJ on his lips. That would stay with him for the duration of their stay at the hotel.
He was worrying too much at that moment. Was his grip too tight? Not tight enough? Were his hands sweaty? Did Steve mind that? He couldn't help it, he had a habit of overthinking things.
But all of those worries disappeared when their lips met, nothing else in the world mattered except for the two of them.
CJ's tongue flicked over his own lips when the kiss had ended, as much as he wanted to pull Steve closer and kiss until they were both breathless it wasn't really the time or the place for it, maybe later.
They had a shared thought but Steve didn’t feel as if this were the place and time for intensity. It was public, first of all, which made him a bit uncomfortable with the idea of doing anything which could be perceived as too much. And second, he wanted to be able to set rules which needed a conversation not appropriate for here and now.
His smile grew. Those blue eyes flashed and he squeezed CJ’s hand.
“The night is only going to get better,” he murmured.
In the back of his mind CJ would've happily left the party now and gone back to Steve's apartment, but that might be a step too far, too quickly. For now they'd stay here in a quieter part of the Bellagio and just be together.
"I think it's pretty good right now," a small smirk and his hand on the top left to tuck an imaginary hair behind Steve's ear.
"But what have you got in mind?" Though he'd follow Steve anywhere.
“I didn’t think that far ahead,” Steve replied. He offered a bit of a laugh. “But I think as long as this really attractive guy keeps looking at me, I’ll be okay.”
Maybe it was mushy, Lily would’ve made noises of disgust and faces at him for being sappy.
The idea of leaving the party had been considered more than once since they’d arrived; he had almost chickened out to begin with. But he didn’t want to spoil the evening or take the special out of the party.
“Well I’m sure that he’s quite happy to keep looking at you.” Came the quip back, it wasn’t like looking at Steve for the rest of the evening would be the worst thing in the world, he’d happily map every feature on his friend’s face for the rest of the night, well until they left at least.
Mushy or not, CJ didn’t care. While they weren’t in the most private of places it wasn’t like they were doing anything illegal or immoral, they were just sitting there holding hands and sharing little touches.
Even if they left before the clock struck midnight it wouldn’t bother CJ, though he wouldn’t admit it, the thought of seeing if there were any hotel rooms available had also passed through his mind.
“Oh good,” he laughed.
This was easier than he thought it was going to be. He and CJ had been friends for years, they knew each other in ways not many others did about their own families. His level of comfort was high, though the awkwardness in this new level remained. He knew it would for a while.
It was nice just sitting under the stars. His knee had begun to throb a bit from the work of dancing but sitting always seemed to help alleviate any ache. Thankfully it wouldn’t be swollen tomorrow.
“If you don’t mind looking at him for that same amount of time.” CJ didn’t think of himself as handsome as Steve, but that was typical self esteem - others were prettier than everyone saw themselves.
There would be no pressure, they’d take this new direction of their friendship one small step at a a time, afterall it had taken him long enough to build up the courage for that first kiss a week before. If Steve was content to spend weeks with chased kisses and small touches, he’d be more than happy with that.
Only the brightest of the stars could be seen through the bright lights that lit up the casino, but it was still a better sight than the inside of the ballroom with the younger adults taking selfies and drinking too much.
A rush of color flooded into cheeks and he found himself worried about the reaction. “I definitely don’t mind.” It was the honest truth. Especially now that he was seeing CJ in a different light.
It wasn’t warm out there, but he didn’t mind the bit of a chill. He did shiver a bit though. A suit jacket did not suffice for staving off the winter weather. Thankfully it wasn’t snowing the way it had on Christmas.
Above them the lights of the hotel and casino shimmered. It was so fitting for the party yet he couldn't help but still feel out of place. Being there with CJ made that easier to deal with. He wondered what Lily would think of this crazy place.
CJ did see that flush of colour and his thumb moved to brush over a cheekbone, he thought that it was cute, though he knew his own blushing was probably just as cute to Steve as Steve’s was to him.
The cold never really bothered him, but it was part of his element after all and he wore less warm clothes than most others, even in the middle of winter. But he did notice that shiver from Steve.
“Did you want to find somewhere a bit warmer inside?” He asked, not wanting his friend to catch a chill.
Steve found himself automatically leaning in against that gentle swipe of CJ’s fingers on his cheek. He would find comfort in small touch, but his friend seemed to know exactly what he needed. For so long he’d gone without and up until now he didn’t realize he missed it.
Emitting a breath, Steve nodded. “If you don’t mind. It’s kind of cold,” he replied, trying to keep the shiver out of his tone. He wished he had more resilience or resistance to the cooler temperatures. The snow had left an impact on him, too.
He wanted to stay there like that for as long as possible but that time was coming to an end. There would be opportunity in the party to get close as they approached the top of the hour that would declare a new year.
As with all new relationships, even with a friendship that was as long as Steve and CJ’s, it was still all a matter of trial and error, either Steve would accept these small touches, or he would reject them. It was a matter of remembering what was what.
He smiled at Steve and moved his hand from his friend’s cheek. “I don’t mind at all, don’t want your knee seizing up on you.” CJ had noticed that Steve had a bit more of a limp when the weather was cooler than during the warmer months.
Standing up he still held onto Steve’s hand. “Let’s find somewhere to sit that’s not the ballroom.” Taking the lead he walked back inside but away from the main ballroom but still at the back of the building, in one of the wide corridors they found a comfortable looking lounge against one of the walls. “How about here?”
That was a good idea, avoiding seizing. “Good idea.” CJ tended to think of things he either overlooked or bypassed on purpose. But it was practical and with that he knew the time outside in the air was done.
He rose, keeping hold of CJ’s hand. A moment to shake the leg with the bad knee as if to wake it up a little, and then he nodded to signal he was good to go. The journey into the Bellagio was brief, too brief.
“Sure, that will work. Are you avoiding the selfies?”
Steve moved to sit himself down on the lounge finding it plush but otherwise comfortable.
He didn’t want Steve to get uncomfortable, especially if it was avoidable and moving inside was something easy that he knew could help. He’d also hate himself knowing it was his fault if Steve was limping.
He chuckled as he sat down next to his friend, turning a bit and tucking a knee under himself. “How did you know? At least that ‘duck lip’ craze has disappeared, just wish the rest of it would.” CJ definitely wasn’t a selfie fan, they never looked that flattering. “Unless you’d prefer to photobomb someone, or get a memento of the night.”
His free hand reached up to rest gently against Steve’s neck.
“Well, you have to take one with me,” he remarked. Phone would slide out of his pocket and he held it up. “Memento, right?” This was probably the last time this would ever happen, the adventure to the Bellagio, and he wanted to remember it.
The app opened, camera pivoting around.
“Ready?”
Steve leaned over against CJ and snapped a few pictures.
CJ chuckled as Steve got his phone out of his pocket. “Photos, or it didn’t happen.” Even though he knew he wouldn’t need pictures to remember the night.
New Year’s with Steve.
He moved a little bit so that the Bellagio logo could be seen over his shoulder as Steve leaned against him, arms looping around the other man’s waist as his chin rested on a broad shoulder. For a few of them he gave a closed mouth smile, then the next few he gave his best toothy grin, and the last one he kissed Steve’s cheek.
He was no professional. Not even at selfie’s - especially not with selfies - but this felt easier than most other times. There were pictures with Lily, silly selfies with the Snapchat filters, but these with CJ were different.
That kiss on the cheek made him warm on the inside.
Steve saved the flurry of photos to his phone, sending a few of them to CJ’s phone for later.
Being a terrible judge of what looked good, he felt satisfied with the way he had been captured and of course his friend always looked good.
It’d be nice when he got home to find the photos waiting for him in a few messages that he could save to his own phone and probably the cloud, to look back on and laugh one day in the future.
“I think we looked pretty good.” He said with a chuckle, arms loosening their grip from around Steve now that the photos were taken. “Better than Miss Duckface.”
He much preferred sitting out here, it was warmer than by the pool but not as stuffy as the ballroom. “Midnight can’t come quick enough.” He mused softly.
“I never understood the duck face thing,” he said, sliding the phone back into his pocket after double checking for messages from his parents. Nothing was there, and he was okay with that.
Then he turned to look at CJ. “And how do you always look so good? It’s magic, isn’t it?” A playful, mock accusatory glance would be offered then was followed by a small laugh.
Being out there was preferable. He didn’t like that he had to compete with the volume or anyone else beyond the large ballroom doors.
“I don’t think anyone understands the duck face, or any of these other… fads. Maybe I’m just turning into an old man.” Although he was a few years older than Steve, he still felt old compared to most of the younger people at this party.
“Could be magic. Or maybe it’s just my good Aussie genes.” One day he’d tell Steve about the gift he had been born with, but he had never found an appropriate time or reason to tell his best friend.
Although they weren’t exactly alone out here, people were still walking past and they were probably under the scrutiny of security cameras, it felt a bit more private.
“You and me both.” He felt older than he knew he was. Between his knee and not recognizing the modern day music, at times he felt like an ancient man. Lily chattered about stuff relevant now that was beyond him.
Then Steve laughed. “Definitely the second one. It’s not even fair.”
Anyone else didn’t matter. He didn’t look at anyone passing by, didn't let anything take his focus away.
Although they were only two men aged in their mid thirties, there were many things in the modern world that confused him. But spending time with Steve made him forget all about that, it made him forget about what he had run from and all that he had left behind in Australia.
“One day maybe I’ll take you both down there, I promise you won’t get attacked by any drop bears.” He joked, at least about the drop bears. The only thing he hoped, if he ever took anyone back to Australia, was that they wouldn’t find out why he had left.
With the smile still on his face he kissed the back of Steve’s hand again, just comfortable in their moment together.
The idea of traveling was exciting. Going to Australia was even more exciting. He wanted to go somewhere new but preparation would need to be done. Passports, itinerary. CJ would know the places to go but he didn’t want to burden his companion either.
“I think Lily would like that. I would, too. It sounds like fun.”
He smiled at the kiss, moving his leg to wake his knee up again. It was hurting. He was used to standing up and being active for hours, games had made that plausible and necessary, but for some reason the joint was protesting.
Iit was much better seeing a country with someone who knew what they were talking about and knew all the best places that the tours seemed to miss. He was also sure that his mother and sister at least would love to meet Steve and Lily, if only from all the talking CJ had done about his best friend.
When Steve moved his leg again, CJ gave a little frown. “If it’s hurting we don’t have to stay… might be for the best to take some painkillers before it gets too bad.” As much as he would like to stay there until midnight, he’d cut the night short for Steve’s sake.
“Are you sure… ?”
Steve frowned. He didn’t want to regret not staying or cut the event short for his friend. “I’m fine, really. It’s just a little tight.” CJ wasn’t wrong about the painkillers. And worst case, he could Uber back to his own place if his friend wanted to stay.
He felt bad regardless.
“Yeah, I’m sure.”
He knew that he could stay, but it wouldn’t be as much fun without Steve there. They had eaten their fill, put a bid on a few items and danced, they had definitely got their money’s worth, even if they didn’t see midnight.
“I don’t want you starting the new year limping around in pain.” A gentle hand squeeze. “I know what your leg gets like, let’s get you home.”
“Okay. As long as you’re sure.”
He leaned over to press a quick kiss against CJ’s cheek and then pulled back to stand up. His knee threatened to lock up. Steve winced and sighed. He’d been neglecting the care necessary to keep his joint mobile and pain free.
Steve shook his leg a bit to give it a boost of energy and alleviate some of the stiffness.
When Steve stood up CJ could see the look of pain on the other man’s face, it was definitely the right decision to leave now, who knew what a couple more hours would do to the already aggravated limb.
He moved to put an arm around Steve’s back, half to keep the touch between them and half to offer support for their walk back to the parking area.
“Let’s get you back home, to drugs and a heat pack.”
He nodded. An arm wound around CJ for support and to be close, and he walked slowly alongside his friend. It would be a long time before they were back here but he had those selfies to reflect back on.