“I’ve got to promise that I’ll finish all the things I said I’d do to begin with.”
It was a strange night. It had been an even stranger week. Derek stood outside Lucky’s Saloon, staring. The place looked deserted. Something had drawn him back there, as if maybe he could study the aftermath, piece together what exactly had happened. Except, there really was no evidence of what had transpired. Somehow, that was more discomforting.
He realized his feet were planted in place, as if he had grown in that spot on the concrete, like a tree. Derek sighed and took a seat on the ground, putting his arms around his knees and looked up at the night sky. Stars were visible in white dots. Derek could spot the red lights of a plane.
Part of him had liked it. The fight, and not feeling so alone. The only problem was, he had lost track of Shimmer after the fray, and it’s not like he had her phone number or any other info. So, back to square one.
Nesryn hadn’t bothered to text Brian.
She was in a mad scramble - her mustard Kia’s tires squealed against the dirt and tarmac as she careened toward the saloon. A cloud of dust as she pulled in and a door would be thrown open. A near panic and she nearly fell out of the car, scrambling to get to the bar.
After what happened at Terrible’s she had to make sure her friend was okay. If he wasn’t, she wouldn’t forgive herself even if it was out of her control.
And then she saw a familiar silhouette with sharp eyes. “Derek,” she breathed, relieved.
Derek jumped to his feet, recognizing the car before Nesryn even got out of it. He stepped forward, one of the parking lot’s lamps illuminating him. His voice was surprised as he said, “Nesryn. Hey.” Then he saw the frantic look on her face, her nervous movements.
“Are you okay?” His eyes zeroed in on a cut across her face, and his demeanor instantly changed. Part of him, and he was slightly ashamed of this, looked for accompanying blood. The other part felt a flare of anger that someone might have hurt her. The internal conflict was uncomfortable.
She didn’t have a good answer for Derek as her gaze turned to meet his. Her brow furrowed. Eyes watered. She was emotional, more than usual as the full moon was close. “I did something bad,” she murmured. Her eyes watered. “I have to check on Brian.” She made herself be strong. This was no time for weakness.
“I hurt someone. I didn’t know. I didn’t mean it.” But she was beating herself up about it. And the rest that followed.
A few steps took her to the doors of the bar and they were grabbed. Pulled. But nothing happened.
Derek was momentarily distracted, his brow furrowed. “Wait, Brian? The dude that works in there?” He watched her pull on the doors, to no effect. “I think they’re closed,” he offered.
The vampire hadn’t missed the tell-tale shining in Nesryn’s eyes, the pain in her voice. Something had happened, something bad. But he knew she hadn’t been at Lucky’s during the big brawl. He approached her slowly, and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. “They’re probably cleaning up.”
Tears would well up in those brown eyes. She’d messed up but she didn’t remember anything. “I don’t know what to do,” she murmured, turning to look at Derek with defeat. “Is Brian okay?” She had to know and Derek seemed to know him.
The comfort was welcomed. She felt panicked but less because of that hand on her shoulder. “I don’t know what to do.”
He nodded. “Yeah. I mean, the last I saw of him, he was wiping off this black ink from a tentacle monster, but I don’t think he was hurt.” Derek frowned, and brought his other hand up to wipe away a tear that was starting to slide down her cheek. Then, because she had done it for him, he pulled Nesryn into a sweeping hug.
“It’s okay,” the vampire told her, though it obviously wasn’t. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
A tentacle monster.
Nesryn took a breath and nodded. Brian was okay. She was okay. Those brown eyes would turn to Derek and she sniffled. “Are you okay?” That hand felt good on her skin, albeit cold. Unknowingly she leaned into it. People didn’t touch her like that often.
“I hurt someone. A customer. There was an incident at Terrible’s, where I work. I think I hurt a few people.” She couldn’t remember. And then his arms went around her and her own would lift around him. A sob broke out. She wasn’t this weak normally, not in appearance. But this time she couldn’t help it.
He pulled back from the hug, but his arms still rested lightly around her shoulders. “Look, I know I just met you. But you don’t seem like the type that would hurt someone, at least, not on purpose.” Derek tried hard to get the words that were in his head out, and have it make sense.
“I’ve done things I’m not proud of. I think a lot of people in this town have. But you came here to check on someone else, so that kind of tells me a lot about who you really are.”
Large, sloppy tears would course down her cheeks. She sniffled, peering around Derek at the still closed doors. He was safe. That was what mattered. Her attention would go back to her friend.
“I don’t want anyone hurt,” she said. The idea made her sick. “I don’t want to hurt anyone.” The last part was a murmur coupled with a blank stare. “Can I tell you something? A secret.”
Derek tried not to let the alarm and discomfort of watching her cry show up on his face. He didn’t want to seem like an ass, but it was something he had never quite gotten used to. Instead, he nodded, looking into her eyes to let her know that he was listening intently. “You can tell me a secret,” the vampire confirmed. “You can tell me all the secrets, in fact.”
He smiled, and added, “I’m pretty good at keeping them.”
That came with a measure of relief. She sniffled again. Sighing hard, not knowing why she trusted him, she gave up her secret. “I — I’m a werewolf.” A swallow. She felt bad for dropping that on him but he needed to understand how dangerous she was. How dangerous she could be and maybe he would get smart and run for the hills. Or the sand dunes.
“I don’t know if that had anything to do with what happened,” she explained, voice small, “but I don’t think it helped.”
A werewolf. Derek had heard of them, of course, but only in passing from his useless maker. She had spoken of the creatures with unconcealed distaste, but Derek wasn’t exactly sure why. Still, he had thought that he would recognize if and when he ever met one. But here Nesryn was, and he had no idea.
No one besides other vampires knew what he was, or so he thought. Maybe some patrons of the saloon would suspect, after witnessing him drain a human of their blood. That audience had included Brian and Shimmer. But it seemed like a good time for quid pro quo, and maybe it would help cheer Nesryn up.
“I’m a vampire,” he admitted. “We all have our things, right?”
She didn’t know vampires but now that the admission was there, she realized that was familiar. More than Derek. Nesryn wracked her brain but she couldn’t remember where she had smelled that outside of the storage units, outside of here.
Her arms were still around him. She was blushing. “We all have our things,” she confirmed. Her tears had stopped but she wouldn’t forgive herself anytime soon. She wasn’t a bad person but the guilt was heavy.
“Thanks Derek.” He was so kind to be there for her, to support her.
“You’re welcome, but I didn’t really do anything.” He wished he had a tissue or anything to offer her. “I’m pretty useless. I don’t even really make a good vampire. I suck at the one thing that should come naturally. I get all in my head…”
Shit. He was making the situation all about himself. He had been broken up with over this very problem, back when he was a human. “How long have you been a werewolf?”
“But you did,” she offered, pulling back a bit. “You’re being a great friend.” He was strong and lending that strength. She could appreciate that. “I’m sure you’re a badass vampire.” A soft laugh would come.
“I was born this way. My family are all wolves, back in Portland, where I’m from. They won’t come here.” She’d burned enough bridges leaving them behind.
His face lit up, an idea coming to him from her words. “Don’t you see, then? You’ve been dealing with this all your life. It couldn’t have been the wolf. Why would it suddenly happen now, where you go out of control? It had to have been something else.”
Derek gestured around them with his hand. “Look around. Things haven’t been exactly normal lately. Whatever happened to you, that made you hurt someone, I doubt it was your fault at all.”
She would turn to look as he gestured. He was right, it couldn’t have been the wolf. Her guilt began to recede but she wouldn’t let herself forget how dangerous she could be. “You’re right.” Those eyes would turn back to look up at him. Finally she smiled.
“I don’t like to hurt anyone, but the woman I hurt, she was strong. She reminds me of you.” A moment was taken to sniff. She didn’t hide it. Fingers wrapped into his shirt as she drew it to her nose and then let it go. “Yup. I think she was the same.”
He smiled as he watched her sniff his shirt. “If she was a vampire, then I’m sure she’s fine. We’re pretty tough.” Derek pulled down the neckline of his t-shirt to show a half-healed claw mark across his upper chest. “I got this last night, and it’s not even an issue.”
Then, an eyebrow raised. “Wait. You fought a vampire and all you got was a scratch? Who’s the badass, again?” Derek knew she was feeling guilty, but he couldn’t help it. He was impressed.
Her moisture slick eyes would widen. Hands lifted to touch at the place those slashed were. “Oh...but you’re okay?” Always concerned about someone else, never herself. But she was glad it wasn’t hurting. Her hands would retreat, falling back to her sides. Boundaries.
And then she laughed, “I’m sure she was the badass.” Sheepish, she bit at her lip and then laughed again. “I don’t like to fight.” And then she broke into her best Arnold voice, “Come with me if you want to live.”
Derek laughed at the impression, but his face soon fell. Now that she knew what he was, something began to weigh on him. “Nesryn, I…” He closed his eyes briefly, trying to figure out what he was going to say. “I’ve killed people. Recently. I have to drink blood, and it doesn’t mean I have to kill the person, but...I sometimes still do.”
“I don’t want to hurt you. I wouldn’t hurt you. But you need to know who you’re talking to. I don’t deserve half of how nice you are to me. You’re so sweet, and…”
His voice faltered, eyes dropped. “And I like you, and that kind of sucks for you. Because you don’t deserve me. I’m not good.”
“Hey,” she said, shaking her head at Derek. “You do what you have to do to survive.” Her face fell. “Did you ask for this?” She hadn’t. As a wolf she had control but she had killed. Brian had nearly killed another wolf over her.
She reached out and took Derek’s tattooed fingers. “We can be friends.” It was a promise she would keep. “You’ve been so nice to me, I’m not afraid of you. And you deserve more than you think you do. Anyone who has told you different can go to hell.”
He wanted so badly to believe her. He took Nesryn’s warm hands in his, fingers twining together. For the moment, he pushed the guilt away and enjoyed her touch. “I’m glad you’re okay. I don’t think I’ve said that yet.”
Derek looked at the closed doors. “Maybe he’s nearby. Brian. You could try calling him.”
She wanted to believe he was good, that there was always hope. Her knowledge of vampires was nil - her parents had warned her but Derek wasn’t like what she’d been told about. He wouldn’t hurt her and she doubted he could do much harm even if he wanted to. She wasn’t afraid.
Fingers would fall between his. “Thanks.” She meant it.
And then her gaze would turn again to the door. It was odd for them to be closed at this hour but maybe if something happened then that would make sense.
A nod and she pulled back, sliding her phone from a pocket, dialing. It went to her ear as it rang.
He instantly missed the feeling of her hands in his, but he gave her a thumbs up as she began calling. Derek could hear the dial tone. The vampire leaned against the doors of Lucky’s.
Nesryn was sweet, but she was wrong. He didn’t need to kill to survive. Derek could just as easily subsist on animal blood. It was a choice. Maybe he hadn’t chosen to become a vampire, but there were always other options. He could burn himself. End it all. Then no one else would have to die by his hand. Or teeth.
Brian picked up and she felt relieved. They chatted for a bit - she explained about what she could remember of the evening before and promised to catch up with him soon. When the call was completed, she turned to her friend and breathed a bit easier. “He’s okay.” As if she were confirming it again, aloud, to herself more than anything.
She didn’t want to keep Derek or cause anymore drama. Now that she was sure that Brian was fine, she supposed it was time to go home and try to rest. Terrible’s had closed for the night, too, for cleaning and resetting the restaurant.
“I told you.”
Derek smiled at her. He could see the relief wash over her face as she had spoken on the phone. “Everything’s good.” That was said with a lot less conviction, but he knew he’d have to deal with his issues on his own. Maybe he’d go back home, see what Wren was up to.
“You did,” she laughed softly, smiling at him. Even with the promise that Brian was okay, she needed to hear it for herself. Thankfully whatever occurred had passed, for now. “I appreciate you, Derek. You’re a good friend. I don’t want to keep you if you need to finish your night.”
She didn’t want to be burdensome, or dramatically drain anyone who may be recovering from the previous endeavors.
He laughed, not at her, but at the idea that she was impeding on any kind of busy schedule. His nights weren’t exactly jam-packed. “You’re not keeping me from anything. I could talk to you all night. But you need to sleep.” Derek pulled Nesryn into another brief hug, his chin brushing against the top of her head.
“Get some rest. Go see Brian. Ask him about the tentacles. It was really...something.”
“We should get together some night,” she nodded. There was no problem staying up all night as long as it didn’t interfere with the full moon. At that point all she could do was listen and not respond. “Soon. After the full moon.” It was in a couple of days - she could already feel the pull.
“Do you have my number?” She held up her phone and wiggled it in the air as if to offer.
Derek broke into a grin as he pulled out his own phone. “You know, I don’t. We should change that.” He unlocked the screen and handed it to her so Nesryn could key it into his contacts.
“Totally!”
Her own phone was unlocked with a swipe, offered to Derek to enter his information. It only took a few seconds and a pause for a selfie, and then she was offering the mobile device back to its owner.
He glanced at the picture of Nesryn, smiling. The phone went back to its home in his pocket. “Thanks.” For the phone number, for not running away when he revealed that he was a vampire. For being her. But those words remained unsaid. Derek had a feeling she knew, anyway. She was very perceptive.
“Okay, now you should really go home and rest.”
“You’re welcome,” she replied. “Thank you, too.” For listening, for not judging, for being there. Derek was a kind soul even if he was a vampire, which had its own bag of tricks. But then, so did being a werecreature.
“I’ll see you around, don’t be a stranger,” she nodded. Her shoulders felt heavy, her whole body felt heavy as she turned and made her way back to the mustard Kia. Once inside she started up the car, offered a wave and was heading back toward her apartment.