No. And I don't mean that in a sentimental or lovesick sort of way, that's just not part of my mentality. I'm still trying to adjust the way I've learned to react to that kind of thing but I never thought that I shouldn't be with him, I just thought I had done something wrong and I didn't know what it was. I never thought that I shouldn't be with Henry in the middle of one of his rages, I just thought that I deserved whatever he was going to do to me. I know that's sad and awful, that's how men like that control women, he was very good at it. So good that I'm unlearning all of that even now.