Guilian was surprised to hear the understanding in his voice. From the way he spoke, it sounded like he had gone through a similar struggle. Yet now... He saw before him a man who looked like he slept at night, and had found the right balance between who he was, and the call of the dark.
"Does it call to you?" he whispered. "Will I be able to sleep at night?" He was willing to do anything right now just to be able to get that peace with himself.
But even as he spoke, he could hear the darkness whispering in his thoughts. He can show you... you can still have us Guilian, but you can have power too. You're better than your brother, and he can help you prove that... we can... He took a deep breath. He couldn't forget the glimpses of power that he'd felt as he'd let dark magic spill forth from his wand, and fill him completely. Lestrange was offering to help him with this.
"I don't think I have any alternative," he said honestly. If he tried to grapple with this on his own, he was most likely going to fail. Licking his lips, he sat for a moment longer, thinking. He tried to make the decision for himself. The darkess within was filled with anticipation. He didn't know if it simply was because Lestrange was there, and it could sense his own innate darkness, or if it was simply excited because he wasn't trying to push it away.
He gave Rabastan an honest look. "I mean, yes, yes I do want that. I mean, I think if I tried to push it away, it would always be there, and always want me to use it. I don't want to give in." For the first time in days, he felt a confidence he'd been lacking.
"I want to control it. You're willing to guide me?" He asked the question on top of Rabastan asking if he wanted it. He couldn't believe this. If he said no, then who else would offer? Certainly not his brother, and certainly not his father. His father had not been pleased when the reports from Durmstrang said that he had dark potential, and they'd never spoken about it again. Merlin knew what he thought now after Cass bloody well told him he was working as a Death Eater.
"Yes," he finally said, trying to drown out the sound of the dark siren song cheering within.