She didn't want any potion, didn't want do be addicted once more, but even as she tried to refuse, the healer had the flask in her mouth and the easy way seemed so much...well easier. She didn't even taste the foul smell, only sensed the relief when the potion claimed her mind and body calming her, relaxing the worst aches.
'No,' she said softly to Romy, even as the healer nodded. 'I don't want him to see me like this.' Perhaps silly seeing how he'd probably seen her like this for weeks, but drugged up was still different. Besides, she'd put herself at risk, she'd put their child at risk. Truth was, she didn't dare to look at him because she couldn't imagine him looking at her with anything but blame in his eyes. She couldn't take him looking at her like that one more time.
She felt a pang of pain in her chest at the thought and let out a groan, somewhere behind the fog in her mind hearing the healer ask her if she was in pain. She nodded without thinking, taking the relief of the potion before the pain of knowing she'd put her child at risk.