Cole Evans {Ichabod Crane} (blackcatsrbad) wrote in bellumlogs, @ 2010-06-30 13:46:00 |
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Entry tags: | ichabod crane, vasilissa |
Who: Cole and Ileana
What: Illy wakes up :D {completed log}
Where: Orange County Hospital
When: Early morning on the 19th
Warnings: None
Ileana's recollection from the ballroom to the hospital were hazy beneath clouds of pain before they were masked with anesthetics. She was almost sure she was dreaming the whole thing, that she would wake and be in bed next to Cole. Then the nightmare would end and be behind her in a lockbox of her mind, rather than this hazy reality that she faded in and out of.
She wouldn't remember the ICU or what the doctors said, rather it sounded muffled like she was twelve feet underwater and drowning. She remembered bright lights above her before something went over her mouth and nose, then she was gone again. When she regained consciousness in the post-operative room, she struggled to keep her eyes open under harsh lighting and see through the dull ache. A soothing, older nurse came by and patted her arm, "You're fine," she was assured, "We're going to wheel you up to your room soon." Then an adjustment to a morphine drip and the edges of her vision go fuzzy again.
They rolled her through a quiet hall in to another quiet elevator up to her room, but Ileana was wishing she knew where anyone was. She had to know if everyone was all right, she hadn't seen Esme. Barely remembered seeing Stefan. Her immobilized left arm and shoulder throbbed beneath bandages still, a dull ache beneath a cloud of medication to remind her of what she had gone through was real, not the dream she wished it had been. The machines, the oxygen she was attached to, and the needles of the IV and blood in to her arm were all real. Ileana shut her eyes to the world again, hearing the nurse talk to someone in the hallway and desperately wished she wasn't alone.
Cole had no idea of how long he sat out in the waiting room, fighting off sleep in every way he could think of. He kept expecting a doctor to appear and give him the bad news, but no one approached him and he began to wonder if knowing nothing was really any better. Was she alive? Was she conscious? How serious was the gunshot wound? How long would she be in the hospital for? There were too many answered questions, and all he wanted after agonizingly long hours was for someone to tell him something. Anything was better than being caught in this hellish limbo.
Then the kind-faced nurse returned, telling him that 'the girl' had been brought to a room and she was ready to have visitors. He followed her like a willing puppy, torn between overwhelming relief that she was alive and guilt for letting her get shot in the first place. Before she let him in, the nurse pulled him aside quietly and told him that he had to make sure she kept calm. Getting upset or overdoing it would only make things worse, and once Cole agreed he was allowed inside.
He pushed the door open quietly, taking in the sight of numerous beeping machines and IVs Ileana was hooked up to through plastic tubes. Taking a deep, shaky breath, he closed the door behind himself and made his way over to the chair someone had pushed next to her hospital bed. For a few seconds he just sat there, staring down at a girl who looked like a shadow of the one he knew. Slowly, one of his hands slid across the bed and curled around her right one, giving it a gentle squeeze. Her eyes were closed, but he didn't know if she was actually sleeping or not, so his "Hey" was nothing more than a whisper.
Fighting against the cotton feeling inside her head, Ileana opened her eyes slowly and turned her head a little to look at Cole. He looked exhausted, stretched thin with worry and she gently gave his hand a squeeze back. "Hey you," she murmured quietly back, her voice sounding thick with sleep and morphine. She couldn't hide the little grimace of pain as she shifted, looking as if she was attempting to actually sit up.
"You look like shit," she managed, giving Cole a lazy grin. Beneath all the bandages and tubes, behind the haze to her blue eyes was still the spark that made her the girl Cole knew. She felt worn down and whoozy, but ridiculously thankful to be laying in an uncomfortable bed on itchy sheets rather than in the downstairs morgue. Gently she tugged at Cole's hand, trying to beckon him closer, "Closer," she was pretty demanding for a girl they thought was at death's door a few hours ago.
Once her eyes opened, he smiled without realizing it and tried to swallow past the tightness in his throat. "You're awake." She sounded like she was being heavily medicated, and the numerous tubes and machines were proof of that. As much as he hated the damn building, he had to be grateful that at least it brought them back on time. Hospitals in the 1920s probably weren't the best or the most capable, but he blocked out 'what if' and tried to focus on the present: she was fine, and that was what mattered.
Cole laughed instinctively, even though it was weak and bordering on exhausted. Now that she was awake and talking, she no longer looked as small and fragile as she had when her eyes were closed. "Thanks. Now I know why people have been giving me looks like I escaped from the psych ward or something." He'd never been very good at denying Ileana anything, and now was no exception. He would've run up and down the hallway screaming at the top of his voice if she asked for it. He pulled the chair forward, leaning over the bed as far as he could. "How are you feeling? Did the doctors tell you anything yet?"
"Kind of awake," she said, slowly blinking her eyes as if she could clear away the fog in her head. There was a part of her that just wanted to close her eyes again, letting her sleep away the ache as if she could wake up healed. The part, though, that was currently winning was her demand to make sure this was all real and Cole was there for her. That she wasn't alone in a hospital in case the building had decided to spin them off in to another time.
She let go of his hand when he moved closer, reaching up to gently touch his face. Tracing her fingers along his jawline and she murmured, "We're really home, right?" She wasn't even sure anymore. Shaking her head a little, Ileana told Cole, "Feel numbed. Can't feel my arm." It was hesitant, trying to clear the jumble of terrifying memories. "I can't remember if they told me...It's all..my head's a mess."
The feel of her fingers along his jaw reassured him that this was real, that it wasn't a dream fabricated to taunt him with false hope. His breath caught in his throat as he leaned into her touch, trying to maintain a smile. "Yeah, we're really home. Whatever happened is over." Cole was pretty sure everyone had gotten back okay, but his attention had been focused entirely on Ileana, so he couldn't be positive. The last thing he wanted to do was go over what happened again, but she would find out sooner or later and he'd rather she heard it from him. "You... do you remember what happened? How we were--" He cut himself off, glancing towards the door before lowering his voice. "We were in the 1920s. I don't even know what happened - there was the Valentine's Day party, and the police just showed up and started shooting." He couldn't even remember the exact moment it happened; all he remembered was turning around amidst the chaos and seeing the blood. "You're going to be okay, though... but it's going to take a while to heal." He hoped she would take it easy and do as the doctors said, but when he opened his mouth to tell her so the words changed halfway through to become something else.
"I'm sorry."
"Good, good.." The relief was evident in her voice. She needed the reassurance that they were safe for the moment. Though she dreaded to think of even being considered safe, since there was a part in the back of her head that was still convinced that they would end up spinning off in to a different time before she could know what was going on. She didn't say anything while Cole went over the attack in the ballroom, her hand stilled on his cheek. The knot of memories unfurled -- the way she had pushed Cole towards the exit, her body was a shield between him and the police force behind them, the sound of the hammers of guns being cocked back before firing. She hadn't expected the shot either, just felt it tear through muscle and bone with the splatter of blood. When she focused back, she saw her hand shaking against Cole's cheek. "Don't apologize," she told him. "Just don't. You didn't shoot me."
While he'd been in the waiting room, the idea of moving out had occurred to him, and now he was beginning to think that maybe it would be best for both of them. They had no idea when the building would strike next or what it would do, and because of it Ileana was lying in a hospital bed with a gunshot wound - who knew what could happen next time? How much more of this were they supposed to put up with? Cole watched her face carefully as she absorbed what he said, hoping it didn't upset her too much.
"I know I didn't, but you shouldn't have been behind me. It should have been--" He cut himself off before he could finish his sentence, swallowing heavily. He felt her hand shaking and covered it with his, shaking his head lightly. "It doesn't matter now. All that matters is you're okay, and once you get out of here I'm going to make sure you stay that way."
"It wasn't your fault," she wasn't in the mood to fight with him over this, but she wasn't having him wallow in his guilt. "Wrong place, wrong time." The thought of him switched places with her wasn't one she wanted to keep dwelling on. He, at least, was able to try to get her to safety. She wouldn't have been able to, she was certain she probably would've stayed at his side and let the police gun them both down than to leave him behind.
Her hand looked so pale compared to his skin, her skin the sickly pallor of blood loss. She gently pulled her hand back, taking hold of his and kissed the back of his hand with a little sleepy smile. "I know you will," she said, conceding rather than protesting him having to protect her. "My Batman, right?"
He didn't want to argue either, but he knew getting rid of the guilt he felt wouldn't be easy. Cole knew she didn't blame him, and he was grateful for that, but not even her words were enough to get him to believe that it was just 'wrong place, wrong time'. He should have protected her, but his track record with that wasn't very good. How many people, after all, had been hurt because of him? It was like he was cursed, but he swore that now things would be different. Nothing else was going to happen to Ileana, and he'd do whatever necessary to make sure of that. "You can say that again. We should have just gone back up to the room."
Trying not to dwell on how pale she was - along with the image of blood spraying and soaking her dress in scarlet - he nodded. "Right. I'll take care of you - and don't bother arguing, because i'm not changing my mind." He smiled, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "You have to promise me you'll be careful, though. Okay?"
"Not like we knew the cops were going to go crazy," she said tiredly, "Can go on and say what we should've done all day long, but we didn't know." Blame would get them both nowhere but deep into a dark hole. Ileana knew Cole well enough that he would dwell there if she let him. If she had to, she'd drag him out of it kicking and screaming. He could find things to blame himself for any other time, but not this. This was squarely on the building.
"What'm I gonna do?" she laughed a little, "Not like I can do much with one arm." Ileana tilted her head towards his hand, letting him push back her hair. "Guess I have to let you take care of me."
She did have a point - none of them could have known that the cops would not only raid the party but start shooting at anything that moved. For a moment he wished he could still hear Ichabod, but he'd just have to work through his issues on his own. Instead of trying to convince her otherwise, Cole just nodded, hoping she'd believe that he accepted the fact that it was an accident. "You're right." There were still a million 'buts' in his head, but he refused to let them out.
He gave her a look, raising his eyebrows in an attempt at teasing that was rendered useless by how exhausted he looked. "I think you can do a lot with just one arm, actually. You're pretty wily when you want to be." He hoped that Ileana would take it easy and keep herself out of trouble, but he had a feeling that was a little more optimistic than realistic. "Good." He fell silent once she agreed to let him take care of her, content to just be as close as he possibly could. It was like he needed to reassure himself that she was here, that she and all of this was real and for now they weren't going to be thrown back into any other time periods.
"I won't be getting in to any fights for awhile, at least," Ileana said with a little grin. The thought, though, went to Bellum and being weak within it's walls, which scared her more than she'd vocalize. She nodded a little and gently squeezed his hand when she saw how exhausted he looked. "You look more tired than I feel," she tried to joke, but her eyes showed her concern. She wanted him to stay with her, not wanting to be alone after everything. Yet, she didn't want Cole to collapse on her.
She hesitated for a moment before asking quietly, "Will you stay with me while I sleep? Promise?"
"Don't worry. I still know you could take me on, even with only one hand." Now that he knew she was okay, it was a little easier to relax - but the knot of worry in the pit of his stomach wasn't going to be unraveling anytime soon. What he was really worried about was the next full moon, and whether or not the injury would carry over to Vasilissa. Even if it didn't, crazy things happened every other day of the month and some people were dangerous all the time. He resolved right then and there to keep a close eye on her, and he'd have to talk to Stefan about that too - even though the man probably hated him at the moment.
Cole didn't hesitate before replying. "I promise. I'm not going to leave you."
She gave his hand a squeeze again, trying to sound light as she said, "Just wait til I get better, new and improved me will really knock you out." There were hundreds of other thoughts now in her head that were being engulfed by a need to sleep away and heal. For once, she wished to just be still. No rushing, no being up and go, rather just stillness and letting her mind slip in to an easy sleep. She asked for one thing, trying to keep awake for a few more moments with Cole. "Kiss me?" she asked him, not even sure if she was making sense when she continued. "Let me know this is really real. That you'll be here when I wake up."
He could tell the exhaustion was starting to become too much for her, and he hated seeing her like this; even though she was alive and eventually would be back to normal. Having no idea what time it was, he didn't know how long visiting hours lasted or even if they had visiting hours. The only times he'd ever been to a hospital were for minor things, nothing like this. Her request made him smile, but his throat tightened even as he lowered his head to press his lips against hers. The kiss was gentle but firm enough to confirm that yes, this was real, and he'd be right there when she woke up. "This is really real, I swear. Now get some sleep, and I'll be here when you wake up."
Ileana sighed softly and closed her eyes when Cole's lips touched her own. Her own worry about the monstrous building playing tricks on her reality again seemed to ebb away to accepting this grave reality. It was better, however, knowing that he was right there. That she would be able to see Esme soon and that Stefan was all right. As long as she knew they were okay, Ileana let herself slip back in to a dreamless, exhausted sleep.