{She feels hypocritical, for it's his hesitance to be open with her, this front that he puts up for everyone, even her sometimes, that upsets her. Yet she's guilty of the same. He had no idea of the maelstrom of emotions brewing in her as she never showed it, just calmly smiled and soothed and assured him everything was fine. She feels his weariness; it seems to slip through under her door and through the small spaces in the house. His last thought cuts through her haze of hurt and she does know, she does, but his demand for her choice threw her off guard and she hadn't meant to tell him like that.}
I know.
{As quickly as it comes, it goes, a sprinkler appearing out of thin air and drenching her and her anger with water, but not him. It's her mental fire that's been doused. Even here she knows to take the high road but it's not borne with a smile, just a mirrored sense of weariness. She wishes she could feel entitled enough to be angry when she felt it.}
There are many things. {The water is draining away, taking with it the remnants of her questions from the walls. As they drip to the floor they reform to new ones. What has she always wanted to ask him? They are all very broad, not limited to one particular topic. They run the gamut of Would you whisk me away from all of this? to Do you hog the blankets?
A series of questions trickles down and away, far far away into the back. Someone didn't trust her to ask them yet, or didn't trust the answers he'd give, and was pulling them away. There is a moment of gratitude emanating from Helena before it's gone, disappeared as surely as the questions now hidden away from her.}
Let's start with... I... I don't even know where to start. When I leave him, when, {She's moving forward, trying to close the gap, trying to reassure.} would you like me to stay in my apartment? There's a chance that he won't leave. He can be quite stubborn, mean in his own way when he wants to be. Although it is yours technically. You're paying for it. If you ask me though, it's a bit much to sweep a woman off her feet and kick out her husband of the house. I'm not sure if I even could stay there. I would like a fresh start with you. I would say that I could move in with you, but I know how men can get. It's a big step, especially you, I think. And you have to deal with me in here all the time. I've tried my best to give you all the space you need, and I can give you the physical distance if that's what you want too. If I move to the lower floors, would you slum it and visit me all the time? I can try to go as high as I can but I only have so much savings left.
{She lets herself ramble. She's moving back toward comfortable again. She stops short of touching him. If he was still wary of her and her apparently hair trigger emotions then he didn't have to close the last bit of distance left.}