past and future, 7
title: past and future, part VII author: callisto24 characters: Jack, Tony, Chase, Kim category: drama, m/m slash theme: pre and past Season4 rating: NC-17 disclaimer: nothing belongs to me, no money made .... * * * * *
“You ‘ re okay, Chase?” “I ‘ m fine.” “We should call Kim first, she ‘ s worried.” “I ‘ ll do.” “You can go into the bedroom, if you ‘ d like to.” When Chase had left the room, Jack locked the door and remained standing there. Tony stepped up behind him, laid his hands on the other mans shoulders, began to softly massage his neck, moving his strong fingers slowly down the arms. Jack closed his eyes and leant into the comforting touch. “My apartment isn ‘ t set up for so many guests,” Jack mumbled and sighed, when these hands worked on his strained muscles. “That shouldn ‘ t be a problem,” Tony mentioned. “We ‘ ve all had it worse.” “True enough.” He laid his head back and moaned quietly, while he relaxed with the taller mans attentions. “So Kim wants some explanations tomorrow. I could calm her down for the moment.” Chase stared at the pair, before he gulped audibly and turned round to put the phone down. Jack stepped aside, threw his keys next to the phone. “Well, we won ‘ t tell her everything, that ‘ s for sure.” “No problem,” Chase added angrily. “I still don ‘ t know, what ‘ s going on. Besides, how shall I explain this to her?” He raised his arm, showing the tattoo. Jack and Tony changed a glance. “Oh please,” Chase stared at them in contempt. “Talk or I ‘ ll find out on my own.” He glanced at Tony. “Had no idea that you would be in Washington. Don ‘ t hold back! If you want to threaten me, do so. The night isn ‘ t over yet.” “What do you say?” “Nothing, Jack. I won ‘ t pretend to understand anything going on here, especially what you two... .” He shook his head. “Looks like a bad moment. I ‘ ll deal with Sharon tomorrow and then return to L.A immediately, like you will do too, probably. Sooner or later you will see your wife. I don ‘ t expect you to leave her, am I right?” He looked at Jack questioning. “I ‘ m more and more wondering about you, but maybe I shouldn ‘ t. Not my business, not my life, besides I ‘ ve had enough trouble for today!” “Chase, you always knew.” “No problem. To read other peoples thoughts is only one of my skills and to see the wonderful and honest relationship you have with Tony shows me how lucky you must be until he will leave again for Michelle.” His words cut the silence, expressing his desperate effort to hurt back, like he felt hurt. “Chase, you don ‘ t know.” “I don ‘ t wanna know anymore. Just tell me who these people had been and I ‘ m heading to Sharon.” “You shouldn ‘ t show up in the middle of the night and in your shape!” “Shut up, Tony!” He took an angry step into the taller mans direction. “How about telling her the jealous lover of my ex messed me up. She won ‘ t be interested in which ex I ‘ m talking about.” “Stop it,” Jack finally interfered. “You should tell me, what this is about between both of you, but not tonight. We all need a rest before we ‘ ll make any decisions. And apart from that, we should be able to act like civilized adults, who we are. Let ‘ s have a drink and go to sleep. Chase needs the bedroom, Tony gets the couch and I ‘ ll stay on the floor. There is no discussion about it.” He took a deep breath. “I ‘ m really glad, Chase, that you ‘ re okay, and it definitely should remain that way.” Roughly he placed the bottle from the past night on the table, added the glasses with a harsh sound. “And I have nothing against smoking,” he mentioned throwing a package of cigarettes next. “Anything to soothe our nerves.” Chase hesitated a second, looked at Tony, clearly laying all his fury and annoyance in his eyes, a sight Tony reciprocated with similar power, before he sat down, carefully touching his right arm. Tony filled the glasses and settled next to the young man, while Jack lightened a cigarette, and leant back against the wall, watching the two men. “What will you do with it?” He nodded to the tattoo. Chase shrugged. “Don ‘ t know! I hate this stupid bullshit!” His look fell upon the inside of Jacks arm, where the sign of his belonging to the Salazar family stayed clearly visible. He shook his head. “Have no idea.” He took a big gulp from his glass. “Did you get some pain medication?” Tony asked suddenly. Chase raised an eyebrow. “And? You wanna tell me something?” “Certainly not,” Tony smiled shortly and for the first time at him and took his own glass. “We should use all the help we can get to bear our company.”
* * * * *
“Dad, it ‘ s good to see you.” “Happy birthday, Kim! How are you, darling?” He hugged her tightly. “Thinking about how much time and energy I needed to convince you to come here... ? More than exhausted!” “Kim! You know, I ‘ ll be here with Heller in a few weeks!” “And then you ‘ ll have so much work to do, that we probably won ‘ t catch a glimpse. Don ‘ t forget, I know you, Dad.” Jack blushed slightly, feeling guilty, same time noticing Chase arriving from the parking lot. “Hi Chase!” “Jack!” Both shook hands kind of nervous, sensing Kim observing them attentively, before she spoke. “Yeah, dad, you should be embarrassed, not being able to prevent Chase from getting such an ugly tattoo. I won ‘ t mention the state in which he returned from D.C.. Nice Christmas present it was, learning my man was letting off steam in a bar fight.” She rolled her eyes. “You ‘ re lucky, that Tony had brought him home in one piece. At least there is one of you a woman can rely on. As far as I know, Tony is sensible enough to stay away from piercings, tattoos, shit like that.” In one swift moment she clung to Chase, looking up to him requesting. “Makes more sense to buy some jewellery for the woman in your life, right?” She giggled. “Don ‘ worry, I ‘ m just kidding, but honestly, I won ‘ t tolerate more of this body painting. Bad enough, that Dad believes in the necessity of this nonsense.” She blinked at Jack, who smiled back dutifully. “Let ‘ s go home, boys, time for my presents!” They remained silent on their way, as they did during the evening. Guests arrived and left and Jack tried to enjoy being with Kim again and to avoid memories of the day Chase and Tony had left Washington.
He had been relieved to be able to work over Christmas, glad he had had something to concentrate on, during these days, something different from his empty apartment, from the images in his mind, images of Tony visiting church, celebrating catholic traditions dictated by ancient rules, or of Chase following family habits, like he had done for years. The day before Chase and Tony had left him, they all had drunken too much. Probably it hadn ‘ t been him alone, whose aim obviously had been to fall into complete oblivion. He had woken up, fully clothed, entangled in Tonys arms and legs, mouth desert dry, throat hurting and a headache he hadn ‘ t suffered from like this for years. On top of it, Chase had been standing in the door frame, pale and clearly hurt, obviously pissed off by the sight.
Trying not to meet his green eyes, he concentrated on Kim and left as soon as possible for his hotel. Kim put up resistance half-hearted, made sure she stayed on Chases side until Jack started to believe she might have become suspicious. Finally he was alone, thinking a moment about calling Tony, but resisted. Being in the same town doesn ‘ t have to mean, that he might want to see him.
* * * * *
Unable to sleep, he watched the darkness from the balcony for hours, until it faded away slowly, making room for dawn. A beautiful sunrise threw its colours over the town. Jack smoked his last cigarette and decided to go for enough coffee to survive another day playing father and grandfather before he could return to D.C.. He left his room, jumped, when he nearly stumbled over Tony, who cowered on the floor. “What the hell are you doing here?” Tony smiled out of sleepy eyes. “Waited... thought... .” “Well, that ‘ s a place for this.” Jack sighed and sat down next to him. “Wanted to go for coffee.” Good idea.” Tony mumbled. “Just give me a moment.” “You ‘ re okay?” “As healthy as I can be with the virus running through my blood.” “Medication?” “Agrees with me. Could live for still fourty years, when I ‘ m lucky... that ‘ s what the doctors say. The progress in research is amazing and in this part of the world we ‘ re provided with everything possible... .” “Yeah, things can change pretty fast.” They silenced. “Michelle?” Tony let out a deep breath. “She tries her best.” “And?” He shook his head. “Don ‘ t know what ‘ s wrong. It ‘ s like I would drive her away without having a reason.” “Try to punish yourself by withdrawing?” Tony glanced at him. “I ‘ m not like you, Jack. Michelle is wonderful, but sometimes I can ‘ t bear her. Should be grateful for her care, but instead... .” He shook his head. What sense would lie in complaining? “She controls you.” “She tries to. It ‘ s..., I guess, don ‘ t wanna talk about it.” “Jack stood up. “So, breakfast?” “Breakfast! Junkfood, Jack, fried eggs and bacon! No fruit, no vegetable!” “Okay by me! Nothing as important as some hot coffee.” He leant Tony a hand to get up. “You look tired, Jack.” “Couldn ‘ t sleep.” “Me neither. You leave tonight?” “Yeah. Promised to see Angela, should work as an excuse, when I won ‘ t see her next month.” “So working for Heller is... acceptable?” Jack shrugged. “Besides he ‘ s a reactionary asshole, I can deal with him. Isn ‘ t worse than Driscoll.” “She ‘ s a little too ambitious, tries her best, though.” “Good for her... we ‘ ll see what future will bring.” “See what this morning will bring at first.” They smiled at each other, content with being together again, knowing that nothing in this world could stay forever.
* * * * *
“Why Chicago?” Jack asked, when they met two weeks later. “ It ‘ s a good place to hide. And I needed some space. Besides nobody would expect you to visit Chicago in spring time.” Jack put his glass down. “You weren ‘ t clear in your mail. You ‘ re thinking about separation?” Tony emptied his glass in one gulp. “Not thinking anymore, I did it.” Jack stared at him. “But you always... .” He looked down on the blank table. “Are you sure about this?” Tony hesitated. “No, I ‘ m not. I ‘ m... .” He stroke his hair back. “Her presence sqeezes me, somehow sucks what is left of my strength out of me gradually until I ‘ m feeling like a hollow shell.” He scratched his chin. “But when I ‘ m without her... I miss her. To be with her means such an effort, to be without her leaves me without a perspective.” Jack leant forward, laid his hand on Tonys and opened his formally closed eyes to meet the black shining ones. “Move in with me!” He felt the blood rising into his face, doubting that he had spoken it out loud. Nevertheless he held Tonys gaze, sensing the heat burning on his skin. His hand turned cold as ice but remained on its place, covering Tonys long fingers, while he waited for an answer. “Jack!” Tonys voice sounded soft and low, a vanishing whisper. Hastily Jack went on talking. “You know, I wouldn ‘ t admit it normally, but I ‘ m thinking... , it ‘ s my wish for a long time now. I never had said a word, because I thought, that you won ‘ t... .” “Jack!” Tony pulled his hand back, slowly, hesitating, but then he broke the touch abruptly. “I won ‘ t... , I can ‘ t... .” “Why Tony, why won ‘ t you give us a chance?” Tony leant back, staring across the room, allowing his gaze to rest on the opposite wall, when he finally answered. “I can ‘ t give her up, if I only could find a way..., if there would be a little bit of hope, that she could be happy with me again... some day... . I ‘ d do anything.” Jack leant back too, studied the pain filled features of his friend, feeling his sorrow as well as his own. “You know Tony, you don ‘ t have to ask, you don ‘ t have to call, you will never come inconvenient.” “Jack, you have your life in Washington now. I don ‘ t want to interfere.” Jack smoothed out his jacket, concentrating on the material. “I ‘ d love you to interfere, believe me!” He looked up, a half sided smile on his lips. Tony returned the smile, relieved about the possibility to ease things up. “I know! So... ,” he paused a moment. “When do you have to return?” “I have the weekend. Still not accustomed to the gift of really being able to go on vacation.” “So... . We ‘ ll have some time ... to talk?” Blue eyes locked with dark ones. “Some time... yes! So maybe we shouldn ‘ t order another drink, maybe our senses should stay clear.”
* * * * *
“So Chicago is a good place to hide!” Jack mentioned, regarding the used furniture, the bleached curtains beside the milky motel room window. “I see what you mean.” The last sunrays threw an orange light through the air, caused the tiny little pieces of dust to glisten like dancing stars. “I knew, you ‘ d love it,” Tony answered slowly approaching the other man. Jack turned, quickly slung his arms around Tonys neck. “You know me too well,” he smiled. “Enough talking for today, seems like problems won ‘ t fade away.” “Not in this life,” Tony acknowledged and laid his hands on Jacks waist, letting his fingers move requesting up and down, before he pushed their groins together. He changed looks with the smaller man, whose blue eyes sparkled magically, created a fascinating contrast to the golden twinkles illuminating his bright hair. Tony raised one hand to stroke the silken strands, without breaking the contact between their thighs. “It ‘ s too long,” he murmured. “What is your boss thinking of it.” “Look, who ‘ s talking,” Jack answered, blowing softly against the dark locks gleaming in the warm colours of this evenings sunrise. Tony arched his back, shivering, seeming surprisingly ticklish. Jack smiled and repeated the action causing a shudder by the other man, who unconsciously leant back pressing his lower body hard against the other man, who gasped in delight. Tony drank his sight, the nearly silver glimmering eyes spraying thousands of hot arrows, while the seducing curved mouth opened slightly, letting out a small sigh. He couldn ‘ t help but pushing one of his knees carefully between Jacks legs, which parted immediately, softly moving it up and down watching the blonds breathing quicken, hearing him moan low enough only he could hear it. “Watch me,” he whispered, while Jack was about to close his eyes, getting lost in the sensation. Jack obeyed, staring into his deep unfathomable dark pools. “What is it,” he said huskily. Tony stopped, sensing his own pulse hammering in his ears. “I... I wanted to be sure, that you want it... Jack, that you know... .” Jack grinned, covering his lips with two fingers. “Too late for regrets, Tony. I probably want it more than you.” Unexpectedly he shoved Tony against the wall, pressing his already fully hard member demanding into the taller mans crotch, proving his seriousness very clearly. Now it was time for Tony to groan, meeting Jacks thrust with his own erection. His blood pounded in his veins, made his heart scream in desire, when he took lead again, turning Jack around leaning against him with his full length. He bent down placing a tender kiss on the inviting lips, feeling Jack responding, trying to open his mouth to him, tasting the whiskey he had drunk before. Quickly he pulled back, moved his lips to Jacks ear, whispered hoarsely. “No Jack, no tongue!” Jack breathed heavily. “Sorry Tony, I hadn ‘ t thought for a moment. Won ‘ t happen again.” “It ‘ s okay, Jack.” Tony placed soft kisses on his throat, sensed Jack gripping him tighter, bowing his head aside, creating room for the sweet caress. Tonys fingers slipped beneath Jacks jacket, removed his shirt until they reached the skin, sliding tenderly over the cool surface. “Tony!” Jack gasped again, squirming frantically, while beloved hands slid up and down his body, paying attention to each sensitive spot they knew for years. Together they removed their upper clothes, ripped shirts open, before they fell on the large bed in the middle of the room. Jack rolled on top, kissing and licking the now exposed chest, crawling up to nuzzle Tonys neck and down to suck carefully on his left nipple, before he moved to the right one, knowing how he could make him scream in joy. Tonys chest rised and fell, his cock started painfully to insist on attention. In one fluid movement he changed their situation, settling Jack beneath him, his turn to touch the spread limbs with mouth and fingers. Jack grabbed the sheets, when Tony circled his navel, licked each single scar on his upper body, before he returned, started to kiss softly his earlobe. Jack tried to resist from tossing his head around, but had to give up when Tonys began to unbutton his trousers. He sucked the air noisily, his eyes flew open meeting teasing black ones , shimmering in pure happiness. “That ‘ s alright for you?” Tony asked with a patient smile. “You ‘ re kidding, man? Don ‘ t dare to stop!” He sighed again, when Tonys head lowered and he kissed strong shoulders, followed tattoo lines with his lips until Jack couldn ‘ t bear it any longer, struggled playfully to get free of arms and legs seeming to touch him everywhere. “Tony,” he breathed, sitting up, nestling in his pockets, pulling condoms and a tube out, hastily starting to open the package. “Well thought,” Tony smirked. “To get mine, we would have been forced to reach for the night-table.” “I knew, I wouldn ‘ t be able to wait,” Jack whispered. “And now, show me what you have for me!” With skilled movements he freed Tonys straining penis, quickly removed his own pants, eyes never leaving the promising hot and hard flesh. “Faster Jack,” Tony begged, when he started to fear, that he couldn ‘ t hold back much longer. Jack expertly slipped the condom over Tonys pulsating length, used large amounts of lube before he sank back on the bed, urging Tony to react. “I want to feel you inside me,” he breathed, “give it to me deep and slow and long!” Tony centered himself, rubbing at the entrance as Jacks voice low and guttural, begged him to go on. He drew up one leg, gaining better access to the place he longed for, grasped the perfect hips, pulling Jack closer. Finally he leant down, spreading the welcoming flesh with his own. Their gazes locked and stayed that way as Tony slowly entered, slid fully inside and rested a moment, giving Jack time to get used to the feeling. “You okay?” he asked, stroking softly Jacks shaft. “Yeah,” the breathless answer. “Come on, Tony... move!” And he did, went deeper, pulled out, increasing the pace of his actions, pumping and thrusting, giving as much pleasure as he received. “Yessss,” Jack hissed, when his prostate was hit again and again, lifting him higher and higher, leaving him moaning and shuddering, bathed in sweat. His legs came up around Tonys waist. “So good... need you, Tony!” “Got you... ” Tony felt Jack spasming beneath him and he exploded, rode the waves to completion until he collapsed in relief, felt himself embraced by strong armes, held tight, surrounded by sweet words his lover whispered, words, which made no sense, but comforted him more, than the close cuddling could do. When his heart beat slowed down, the all-consumpting fire in his body changed into life-spending warmth, he opened his eyes, lifted his head, resting on one arm. “Jack?” he asked, his voice rich with the love he felt. “You... you ‘ re not afraid?” Jack opened his eyes dreamily, a tender smile danced around his lips. “The secret consists in refusing the fear to overtake control. You won ‘ t let this mess beat you, nobody of us will. We know better than most people, that life is a risk and can end each second, the only way to deal with it is to do our best and keep on fighting.” “Always a warrior,” Tony laughed back and leant down to kiss his cheek. “Whatever demanded,” Jack answered, burying his face in the soft place between shoulder and neck, pulling the other man down on him.
* * * * *
Season4 * * * * *
some time after Season 4
“You won ‘ t leave me Chase, not now!” “I ‘ m sorry, Kim.” He moved to the kitchen, took the wodka out of the refrigerator. She watched him with barely controlled anger. “Drinking is the answer to all of your problems?” “At least it helps,” he replied. “You ‘ re such an egoistic bastard, I thought Angelas sake would come first place for you.” Chase filled the glass, raised it to his head to cool the painfully burning temple. “She ‘ s my first priority, Kim.” “Then, why are you doing this to her?” “She ‘ ll be happier without me.” “How can you say that, you ‘ re her Dad.” “I won ‘ t be out of her life, just as you can be there for her, but with Jasmin and Sharon she has the caring family, she deserves.” “She had a family with us.” Kim screamed out her frustration. “Please, Kim, you ‘ ll wake her!” “Then stop telling me this shit!” “I can ‘ t, sweetheart, I can ‘ t do this anymore.” “Don ‘ t call me like this,” she exploded. “Do you really think I don ‘ t know, what ‘ s the reason for your behaviour?” In her rage she threw herself against his hard body, struck wildly against his chest, forcefully covering him with blows, which caused him to lose the grip on his glass. It tumbled on the floor, broke in pieces, creating strange, sharp forms, signs of danger and alteration. He found himself studying them curiously, while the scent of alcohol streamed around them, filled the room. She stepped back abruptly, giving no thought about lowering her shrill voice, shook her head violently, made an useless effort to suppress a sob. “You ‘ re so alike, you and Dad. It becomes difficult and you run.” “Don ‘ t talk like that about Jack!” “He was my Dad, Chase, my Dad! I ‘ m in mourning, in mourning, Chase!” She started to cry. “You will never know, what I ‘ ve gone through because of him. And exactly the moment I need your support more than ever before, you choose to decide giving up everything we ‘ ve built together. I ‘ ll never forgive you, neither will Angela, I promise.” He remained silent, felt that he deserved her accusations, wished she wouldn ‘ t stop, wished she would be able to touch him, that what she said would be able to change his mind. Nothing could touch him anymore, since he ‘ d heard from Jacks death. Nothing but paralization, numbness filled the days passing by without him noticing them. He should have died, too, the thought never left him. Through a grey mist he had watched Kim breaking down, crying, ranting, blaming CTU, politics, the fate, but at least she had managed to let her sorrow out. He hadn ‘ t been able to, had showed nothing, most times felt nothing, remained quiet, had done what had to be done, helped whenever possible, but his insides had been cold all the time. And suddenly he had known it, no new discovery, no surprise. The only surprise had been the fact how clear everything seemed. No doubts, no inner fights anymore, only the realization what he had to do.
* * * * *
“Chase! What are you doing here in CTU?” “Conversation with Bill. Why do you ask, Tony?” “Nothing, just thought... .” “Thought what? That with a hand like this I ‘ ll never be able to work in the field again? Congratulations! Bill told me the same.” Tony startled. “I hadn ‘ t known, that you wanted to... . I admitted... .” “Well, surprise! But never mind! Won ‘ t happen, at least not here!” “I can ‘ t imagine, that Bill would say something like that,” Tony wondered. Chase rolled his eyes. “Not in these words, more like... there is always a chance anywhere!” “You wanna talk about it?” “Certainly not!” “Look Chase, got my recommendation from Washington today, maybe I will be able to do help you in this.” “Don ‘ t want your help. I know how you helped Jack!” “Chase!” “Forget it. Leave me alone!”
Tony remained where he had stood before, watched the beaten figure going away. He felt guilty, that he hadn ‘ t cared about Kim and Chase. The last time, he ‘ d seen them, had been during Jacks funeral. Chase had seemed to be calm and composed, ready to support Kim. He had gained the impression, that together they would get over it. Kim must have expected a scenario like this for years and though it hurt him, that he wasn ‘ t allowed to tell her the truth, he knew, there couldn ‘ t be a way to do so. And Chase? He had seen no reason to think about him, maybe he should have done. But there had been so much to deal with during the past weeks. They had covered Jacks vanishing, which had been extremely difficult, but somehow they had managed to leave Buchanan out of the loop. It had been easy to delude Audrey and Heller, Curtis had asked some strange questions, but probably he had enough work to deal with, after the events. His new life with Michelle, the new job, the permanent worry, that their secret could be revealed, hadn ‘ t left enough space to think about Chase, too. Suddenly he became aware, that he had no idea how Kim and Chase were doing.
He ran after him. “Chase, wait!” Chase didn ‘ t stop. Instead he increased the pace, never looking back, until he had left the building. Out of breath Tony reached him finally, grabbed his arm. “Sorry Chase, I don ‘ t want to bother you, but I need to know, how Kim is.” Chase stiffened. “You ‘ ll have to ask her then, cause I don ‘ t know.” “What do you mean?” “We parted?” “What?” Tony looked at him without believing what he had heard. “Why now? She left you?” Chase shook his head. “I can ‘ t see why you should be interested. It ‘ s not your problem.” “I... I... ,” Tony stuttered. “I promised Jack once to look after Kim.” “You did a great job, Tony, leave me alone with it.” “Where is she?” “I don ‘ t know. Had been away, bringing Angela to my cousin and now I ‘ m only here to get rid of the house and looking for a job. Kim had made herself pretty clear, she had no intention to see me again after what I ‘ ve done to her.” “You mean, she knows?” Chases eyes went dark in fury. “She knows that I couldn ‘ t live with her like this again, and she knows, that I have to do what Jack did for a living. It ‘ s not much, but it ‘ s my contribution to honour his remembrance.” He turned round in order to hide the fact that his eyes started to burn. Shit, he hadn ‘ t cried since they had received the message and he was determined not to do it in front of this man. “Chase!” Tonys voice trembled. “I hadn ‘ t known, I had no idea.” “Right.” Chase succeeded in changing his sorrow into anger. “He died, and your life becomes better every day.” “Chase, that ‘ s not how... .” “It ‘ s how it looks to me, but forget it, I ‘ ll go.” “No Chase, let ‘ s talk about it.” “Damnit, I said no!” Chase exploded, moving away quickly. Tony followed him, unsure about what to do, but unable to leave him alone. “Chase, you don ‘ t look good. Let me drive you home and we ‘ ll find out what we can do. Together.” “There is no together, Tony. Can ‘ t believe what you ‘ re suggesting. Do you really think you could use me and throw me away like Jack?” “Chase, I would never..., I had never... .” Chase laughed bitterly. “Sorry, had been true love! How could I have overlooked the fact, that you had been always there for him.” He couldn ‘ t prevent his eyes filling with water suddenly. “He would have done everything for you, he would have died for you... ,” he stopped for a moment. “Maybe he really died for you, I won ‘ t know as long as I ‘ m not allowed to hear the details. The story they had told Kim... ! I worked long enough in this profession, to know, that there is something wrong. And I don ‘ t expect you to tell me the truth. I hate your guts, Tony and I never want to see you again!” “Chase!” Tonys voice trembled, broke,hearing the other mans contempting words. “It hadn ‘ t been like this. You don ‘ t know what happened... .” Tony silenced, stopping himself from revealing too much. “You ‘ re right, I don ‘ t know,” Chase continued and with a last glance at the dark-haired stepped back, turned and left the place, glad to feel the anger burn inside him, consuming each other feeling he might have developped being confronted with the man, Jack had loved.
* * * * *
Tony drove in circles, slowly lessening the distance between him and his aim. After an eternity of endless country roads and state highways, after having crossed countless frontiers, after double checking that no pursuer would have a chance to show up, he finally braked, came to stop in a town, he ‘ d never known existing.
* * * * *
“This is why we need you here, Mr. Edmunds. But you know, that once in the organization, you can ‘ t step back. You ‘ ll be without contact to any of us, maybe for months, and you ‘ ll have to stay, until we ‘ ll have enough proof. And that might last one year or ten years.” The head of the department went quickly through the files in front of him. “You mentioned, you have no family commitments, no social connections, which would bind you, and with your skills you ‘ re perfect for this job. Still have to develop a background for you and a believable story for your hand injury, but that won ‘ t be a problem.” “If I ‘ d like to see my daughter from time to time?” “No problem, as long as you stay careful and the visits have to stop, when you ‘ re fully integrated. But as I told you, we ‘ ll need a lot of patience for this. Nobody can tell know how much time it will cost.” He sighed and closed the files. “ These people aren ‘ t stupid. But I see, you ‘ re not new to this.” Chase rised. “Sounds like the task, I ‘ ve searched for.” “Glad to have you here.” Both men shook hands. “And you ‘ re sure, you wouldn ‘ t regret leaving Los Angeles?” “No.” Chase smiled. “I never felt at home there. And I ‘ m honestly looking forward to explore New York, will hopefully be very different.” “You can rely on.” His new boss smiled back friendly. “So welcome in our union. Our work is often boring, exhausting and mostly disappointing. But sometimes we are successful and then it ‘ s worth the effort.” Chase nodded. “See you tomorrow then!” “Yes.” The tall dark man in an elegant suit watched the slim shape leaving his office, remembered the dozens of young men, he had engaged during the past years, and what the job had done to them. No matter how hard and determined they seemed, sooner or later each one of them came close to give up. Chase Edmunds won ‘ t be an exception. Lonely and desperated as he seemed to him, he should also include to danger of him changing sides, wouldn ‘ t be the first agent, who gives in to the temptations he would meet on his way. Sometimes Mr. Woodside doubted the fact, that their actions made any sense, but on the other hand what else could they do?
* * * * *
Jack snuggled closer to his lover, kissed tenderly his throat. “I had missed you,” he sighed. “You made it clear last night,” Tony grinned. “Had never seen you so ... hungry before.” He groaned. “Not sure, when I will be able to move again.” “I ‘ ll help you explore that,” Jack moved up to kiss the bare chest. “Oh dear, you ‘ re killing me,” Tony sighed, gasping when Jack started to caress his already hard nipples with fingers and tongue. “Not yet,” Jack teased, returning to his favorite place on Tonys neck. The taller man stroke the blonds back, following the ups and downs of trained muscles, bones and tendons with sensitive fingers, causing a shudder shaking the other man. “You ‘ ve lost weight again,” he mentioned rebuking. Jack shrugged. “No appetite. I simply forget to eat.” “But not to drink,” Tony critisized, looking at the empty bottles in the corner. “Won ‘ t deny it, Tony. It ‘ s sometimes... sometimes I don ‘ t like it being on my own all the time.” “You still avoid contacts?” Jack remained silent, sucked slightly on Tonys earlobe, who moaned happily. “Not the important ones,” Jack answered at least and turned to sink on his back, crossing his hands behind his head. “Would be stupid to create questions in peoples minds.” “So you ‘ re changing places?” “As often as possible. Maybe in a few months I ‘ ll try to settle down somewhere for a while. But now... .” He laid on his side again, unable any longer to lose touch to the man he had longed for during the last weeks , more than he would ever admit to him, before he placed his hand on the flat stomach, feeling the warmth of Tonys body streaming through his fingers straightly into his heart, which jumped in joy, forgot the loneliness, the unsolved questions, the guilt, he carried with him, wherever he went. Tony reached out to hold his hand in place, catched it in a strong grip and when he looked into Jacks face, he discovered the unshed tears behind those beautiful eyes, which colour seeemed to change every day and night again. And he couldn ‘ t get enough from staring into them, long and deep, trying to find out, if it was the blue ocean they reminded him on, the bright clear sky or the dark green forest combined in their shimmering glance. Right now the little amount of morning light streaming through the closed blinds of the shabby boarding-house Jack had seeked out as his refuge, let silver stars twinkle out of the blue, revealing more, than Jack allowed them usually to reveal. “I missed you too,”Tony whispered, before he pulled the other man close, placing a soft kiss on his delicious lips. “I know.” Jack blinked. ”You also had proved it tonight.” He ran his fingers through the dark hair, watched the black curls gliding around his rough hands, allowing them to comfort the dry skin. “Maybe I ‘ ll be able to prove it again,” Tony breathed, closing his eyes, melting in the delicate touch, feeling himself harden again, when he pressed their lower bodies together, when his hands moved to cup the other mans buttocks in a possessive hold.
“Yesss,” Jack hissed in excitement, pushing Tony on his back again, before he got on top, reaching out for the condoms on the night desk. Tony kneaded hot flesh, fitting so perfectly into his hands, making Jack arch and moan in delight. “Faster Tony, do it,” he croaked trying to control his bucking, while his trembling fingers covered Tonys rising cock with the soft sheath. He caught the lube, quickly taken away from him by the dark-haired, who grabbed large amounts of the creamy substance, distributing it around the sweet entrance he surrounded slowly, well knowing how to drive the blond mad. He laid his hand on it, protecting and demanding, ignoring the growing desire, causing the other man to move against him, to concentrate his attention on the pulsing length between his legs. “Tony, please,” Jack begged desperately, unable to believe, that he was aroused again, that his body, hot and sweaty, still hadn ‘ t enough. He screamed, when Tony stopped circling and slowly moved one lubed finger in, searching for the spot inside. Tony grinned, surprised by Jack, who usually remained silent, except his gasps and moans from time to time. Blindly he found, what he had looked for, rubbed over it again and again, making Jack cry in delight, making him plead and beg for for, until he couldn ‘ t bear it any longer, threw him around forcefully, gliding up and down the small body, breathing heavily. Jack pulled his knees up, opened himself to his lover, who couldn ‘ t hold back, thrust inside in one quick movement, feeling the strong grip surround him. Eyes locked, mouths opened in delight, while they climbed the stairs to ecstasy together, lightened a fire, flaming higher each time their bodies slammed together. They danced together in perfection until they finally moved as one, became one, reached climax together, when Tony shoved in one last time, filling Jack deeply who met his final thrust with a last push back on the hot penis inside him, taking him with all he had, offering him everything, as he was offered everything, he had ever longed for. Their screams turned into groans, when their movements became slower, when devouring passion changed into peaceful loving, when Tony leant down, covering Jacks face with soft kisses, before he collapsed on the other mans hard chest. Jacks arms encircled the lean body, stroke carefully Tonys back, sensed their heartbeats pounding in the same rhythm. He closed his eyes contently, feeling his lover still inside him, knowing this had to be heaven on earth.
Tony looked into his eyes, pulled out carefully, taking care of the used condom. Jack watched him smiling, when he headed for a shower, touched the place on the sheets, where he had lied before, breathing the air, filled with his smell, the scent of their sharing. He closed his eyes remembering the sensations, saving the memories deep, locking them in his mind. No time seemed to has passed, when Tony returned, wrapped in a towel. He remained standing in the doorframe leading to the bathroom, admiring the sight of the bright figure, bathed in golden rays, the light which entered forcibly the room from outside. Jacks body, barely covered by a thin material, strong and vulnerable simultanuously, roused the wish, the need to care for him, to take care of him, as long as he would be able to.
Jack opened his eyes slowly, noticed Tony watching him, curled his lips in amusement, while his heart stopped when his glance went up and down the beautiful figure in front of him. The vibes between them reigned their worlds, made them shiver, when their looks touched. Jack swallowed dryly, broke the spell by sitting up, glancing away from these hypnotizing eyes. “Maybe you ‘ re hungry,” he tried to call back a piece of familiarity. “ I suggest us to skip breakfast, going straight to lunch. What do you think?” Tony licked his lips. “ I think I don ‘ t wanna leave this room anymore, never.” Jack swang his legs out of the bed, raising his eyebrowes. “Sounds tempting, but I fear, I ‘ m starving, if I won ‘ t get something to eat soon.” “So, you regained your appetite?” Tony grinned. “Seems so,” Jack looked back at him. “Or should I blame some energy consuming activities, remembering me on the simple things we need to survive.” Tony laughed. “Amen to that, and glad, I could help you.” “Idiot,” Jack boxed him playfully into his side, when he passed by. Tony smiled, when the bathroom door closed behind the naked man, listened to the water starting to run, imagined him stepping into the shower cabin, imagined the hot water streaming down the skin he had touched tonight, knew he would never forget one single moment of this night.