darcy lewis will tazer you. (getstheircoffee) wrote in avengers_logs, @ 2018-03-24 20:41:00 |
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Entry tags: | -complete, -rating: red, darcy lewis, loki odinson |
Who: Loki and Darcy
What: Going to buy weed and maybe trying to make up
When: After her little announcement on the comms
Where: Out in the city
Warnings: Language. Drugs. Rated O for oh-my-fucking-god-are-you-two-fighting-a
Darcy still wasn’t sure she was going to regret posting that stuff on the comm. It had stirred up a lot of things, but she wasn’t really one to regret anything. The thing was that he kept doing these things to make her mad, and sure she would yell at him but what was exactly the consequence? Nothing. Well besides her being mad at him. She’d decided that she was going to give him an incentive not to fuck with her shit again. She had made a promise about not telling anyone about the Tesseract and she was keeping to that. But there had to be consequences, otherwise he was going to keep throwing her shit out and pissing her off.
At the very least though, she’d gotten him to actually pay to get her more weed. That was something. He was angry at her, and she could accept that. She was mad at him all the time, so she could take it when he was mad at her. They could both act like petulant brats though, she knew that. She didn’t know what was going to happen, but she was going to try and be on her best behavior today. She went over to her former place of resident and then went up to the door and knocked on it. She wasn’t going to just open the door and come in, like she still lived there.
Once he was at the door, she stuck her hands in her pockets. “Hey. So I thought we’d go get that weed you owe me and then.. Whatever you want to do.” Whether that meant completely ignore her or still be mad or whatever.
Well, saying things has escalated between them was an understatement. At this point, Loki was considering that anything that looked like a date or sounded like a date or was a date, should not be called a date. It seemed to tempt fate toward bad luck of his own making, which infuriated Darcy to the point of using extreme measures of vengeance against him. For the entire evening, he locked himself in Darcy's old room, quietly thinking for a long time, and then furnishing it to suit his own needs. It took most of the night, although Loki didn't look the least bit tired for having done so. That was the glory of being able to use illusions to cover such things up.
He just finished getting ready when there was a knock on the door. Loki opened it and was leaning out to look at her, wearing all-black casual attire, even if it was of the upscale variety. At least it wasn't an all black suit. However, it was becoming apparent that he preferred looking like a warlock that lost his way to a goth convention.
In the meantime, he found Darcy to be a beguiling creature. A very vexing creature as well, considering how she deftly angered him and then had him laughing. It was very complicated. Lucky for both parties, Loki was well versed at navigating through complicated matters.
After a quiet moment of introspection and watching her with a wary stare, Loki smoothly stated, "I will gladly go with you, as it is recompense. But do you not think leaving the options so open, might court disaster? I would not want to raise your hackles again. I fear what you might say next."
It was probably for the best not to call them dates. Besides dates to her were more like just going out to dinner or the movies. Not going to infiltrate things for her boss, or go to some other realm and take an all mighty mystical cube. She didn’t really want to go out to dinner or the movies with him. They both liked to eat, so that wasn’t a problem. But she would rather just hang out with him. She still wanted to, despite the fact that he was the one that was angry with her this time.
She wondered that if they ever made a color darker than black, if he would wear that on days when he was sulking. Like today. As soon as he opened the door, she could tell that he was still grumpy. That was fair. She didn’t think he was going to get over it any time soon. But she wasn’t going to be sorry for what she did.
“You probably should be worried about what I might say next. You want to get all your comments out now? I can wait until you’re done.” If he thought he was going to win at this sass game, he had another thing coming.
If there was sass to be had, he was a willing participant to the game. He was wearing all black for the express purpose of sulking. It was his go-to attire for sulking and brooding in dark corners. If it was any other moment, there would be plenty of greens and gold embellishments. But this was not any other moment. This was him facing off against a sarcastic nemesis the likes of which he'd never faced before, and it just happened that he was rather attracted to her as well. Damn it all.
He stepped out, leaving a double of himself behind as he closed the door, although it was difficult to tell which was real and which wasn't.
"Oh no, by all means," he said in a voice that could weave words like silk. He held out one hand to gesture to a car that Stark obviously bestowed onto her for the running of errands. "I would not want to keep you from replacing your precious illegal weed. Far be it for me to do so. For if I did not, there is no telling what you might announce to the masses next. And I would so hate to keep you from your daily tasks, such as punching someone in the tits."
He was angry. He was deeply worried about her. He was definitely embarrassed, as that was far removed from anything Odin would have ever let happen in the royal court. He was also supremely impressed and incredibly amused. It was a very chaotic mixture of emotions that he was still trying to sort through, and lended itself well for the soothingly sarcastic tone he was taking with this sassy Midgardian woman.
Oh yeah, she could tell how much he was sulking. He had that sulking face on. It was a super cute face, that was what was so annoying about it. A face that made her want to cover his face in kisses. But that probably would only make him more upset, she didn’t really know. She wasn’t trying to interrupt his sulky groove. Ah there we go. Hard core sarcasm. That at least she understood, more than all of his fancy terms and his bourgeois tone.
She stepped back and gestured towards the car again. This time there wasn’t any weed in the car. Because she didn’t have any. And because she wasn’t going to leave it in there any more with slippery-fingers over here. This whole going to get weed thing notwithstanding. “Then let’s go get my weed. Look I know what I said and everything, but I’m not going to blab our secret. I said I wouldn’t and I’m not fucking going to. So you can calm the fuck down. I might be a loud mouthed bitch, but I’m not a complete cunt.”
That was all she was going to say about that. She went over to the car, unlocking it and getting in. She didn’t actually have anything else to announce to anyone. Not about him anyway. She could probably announce some of Tony’s secrets, but until he pissed her off, she wouldn’t do that. The thing about being a nobody that no one cared about was that she found out things easily and no one paid any attention to her.
Loki's sulk face turned into one of awed silence as he watched Darcy get into the car. After a long moment, he slowly made his way over and got in. By the time Darcy had started the car and they were a half a block from home, Loki decided to say something.
"Not complete, but perhaps partial?" Loki joked. But with the way his eyebrows were raised and he was smiling wildly, he clearly meant it as a jest in poor taste. He clearly didn't enjoy the revenge tactic, but he did appreciate her blunt and foul mouthed humor. Odin would have hated Darcy Lewis, as she was everything that Asgard wasn't. And that was just one of the things that Loki found he liked most when spending time with her. The other was actually making her angry, to hear her drop a great many foul words and watch the color rise to her cheeks. "Before you loudly say terrible things at me, know that I do not mean that in all seriousness. And I appreciate that you will keep our secret between us."
Starting the car, Darcy headed to where she usually got her weed from. Actually it wasn’t just some random guy on the street. It was a kid she knew a couple of blocks over, though where he really got the weed, she didn’t pay much attention to. Because she really didn’t want to know. It wouldn’t take very long to get over there though.
“I’m going to remember you agreed with me,” she pointed out and didn’t look over at him. Yes. Poor taste. Only she could call herself a cunt, Loki. Good grief. No wonder he didn’t have a girlfriend. Yeah Odin would have hated her, and she would have hated him. That would have been fine with her. “I hope you didn’t, or we’re going to have more problems than you throwing my weed out the window.” Like basic understanding and treatment of women for starters. She wasn’t going to be having sex with some misogynistic asshole.
Loki rolled his eyes that she even took that seriously, as she was the one who first said it. He was making fun of the complete part in so much as hinting that there might be a partial version. And besides that, Darcy was probably never going to meet anyone that looked up to his mom as Loki once had. Conversely, he had called Romanoff a 'mewling quim' so never say that Loki isn't a perfect example of being contradictory.
"I did not agree with you. Do you honestly think that I would think that of you?" He looked over at her in disbelief, and whatever smile he had was now turned upside down into a frown. "You clearly started it with your declaration, and I stated that it was not meant seriously. Must we start having another tiff already? I am weary from the last one you started. Let us simply obtain this illicit substance and be done with it."
Loki folded his arms over himself, chin held high as he adopted his most carefully constructed expression of boredom while staring out the passenger window.
“That’s why I was giving you the side eye and not actively telling you off. I know that you were joking, but y’know.. “ she shrugged. Sometimes… men had to be put in their place. A reminder. A gentle one. “I’m not arguing! I didn’t even raise my voice.” In fact her voice hadn’t gone up once, she was just gently reminding him. That was better wasn’t it? Than her lashing out. “Okay okay, no more talking.”
That was fine with her. The drive over to her dealer’s house was only a few more minutes. There was an apartment building. She was let in the front door by a nice guy at the front desk who recognized her. She buzzed the apartment number and a very stoned voice told her to come on up. Into the elevator and up to the apartment. It was safe to say that this was some Pineapple Express level of weed dealing up in this apartment. Not that he would know what that was, but still. The smell was pretty obvious.
Loki did not dignify her with a response on that matter, because they had already fooled around on the return road trip while very much in a womanly form, and so it should have been patently obvious that he did not need a reminder, no matter how gentle. She was the one who started it with her crass insinuations, and he decided on being obstinate in a profoundly regal manner. He wasn't even arguing the point. He is above it. Look at him. Sighing while rolling his eyes at regular intervals, all the way up to the point where they gained access to what looked to be a slovenly hovel inhabited by petty scoundrels.
All pretenses at being regal were dropped when he was standing next to Darcy, his eyes boring holes into the side of her face, and his nose wrinkled up like he was confronting the most foul smell in the entire universe.
"It smells," Loki whisper-hissed through clenched teeth, "like the rotting corpse of a bilgesnipe, baking in the midday sun."
He took out some of the Midgardian paper money, which was going to put a dent in the Asgardian finances for groceries. It was part of the money that Valkyrie had chipped in for food. He was going to have to amend the future shopping lists until the future treasure hunting venture took flight. Hopefully no one would notice in the meanwhile.
"Enough. You've proven your point and I have suffered enough," he said, keeping his voice low so only she could hear. "Do not tell me you come here alone. Do you ever fear for your continued well being?"
Just before Darcy knocked on the door, he spoke up again. “You won’t ever have to come here again as long as you know to leave it alone next time.” Good grief. She needed to get him high. Maybe he’d chill the fuck out. Oh yeah. That’s what she was going to do. Make brownies. “It’s not that bad. This is a pretty decent neighborhood for New York. It just looks bad. They all look bad. But this is pretty much the suburbs part of New York.” Not that it had suburbs but if there was some, this would be it.
Finally she knocked on the door and this skeevy dude with long hair and a big old grin answered the door. He greeted her warmly, and she hugged him. “Don’t worry, he’s with me. Ignore the scowl on his face. He owes me money, and this is how he’s going to pay me back.” The guy looked Loki over and shrugged his shoulders and let them both inside.
“Is he your boyfriend or something?” the guy asked.
“Sometimes,” she answered.
The guy shook his head. “Oh man, the guys are gonna be so pissed about that. I’m Ray, by the way. Oh hey that rhymed!” He laughed. She laughed. It was fun. Then she in turn looked over at Loki. “Loki, that’s Ray. Ray, that’s Loki.”
Unfortunately, the most chill that Loki would get was probably a single yawn and then an inquiry why the brownies had a strange aftertaste. Other than that, nothing. Because everything on Midgard was weak. Even the coffee, of which it took a monumental amount, buckets worth, to make him feel anything resembling slightly more awake than the norm. While that meant there was probably not that much that could make him ill or poison him, it also meant that if he was gravely injured, there would be a lot of issues with Midgardian medicine helping. At all.
For the time being, Loki was not laughing. What he was doing was staring at Darcy in such a way, that he looked to be hovering somewhere between surprise and irritation. After inwardly puffing up with pride that Darcy thought of him as a sometimes boyfriend, which he knew was of some import in this realm, he seemed to recover. It wasn't in his nature to dismiss a sarcastic slight, after all.
"Of course, sometimes," Loki said, plastering a smile on at the very skeevy individual known as Ray. If there was one thing that Loki was good at, it was schmoozing. "Dearest Darcy, I had no idea you were a patron of the arts! Hello, Ray. What a pleasure it is to meet such an adept poet."
Yeah that’s why she wasn’t really going to waste her brownies on him. That would be a giant waste and she’d already wasted enough of the good weed. If he got really injured then he was pretty much screwed. That also sucked, but she didn’t know what to do about that at all.
She felt his eyes boring into her, and she tried not to look over and give him a look about it all.
“If you keep trying my patience, it’s going to be a no,” she said with a fake sweet smile. Ray seemed to be super amused at the whole thing. “Hey man, I just sell the good shit. My aunt was a poet though.” He was already going to get Darcy her usual order, though if she had a new one, he would absolutely get that for her.
“Is this guy giving you a hard time, Darce?” He finally asked.
Darcy shook her head. “No, not really. He’s just mad he has to be here. And we’re not getting along. I’ll take my usual.”
Ray grabbed a bag and then handed it out to her. He quoted a price, more at Loki than her since it was him that was paying.
His mood was improving. Loki tried not to laugh when she gave him that fake smile, because he was just as amused as Ray was. Of course, he also looked profoundly amused that Ray's aunt was a poet, because he could all too easily imagine what Ray's family line was like, and that mental image didn't lend itself toward an eloquent mastery of Midgardian language. To coin an Asgardian phrase, the golden apple couldn't fall too far from the tree it grew upon. Although these apples might have some tarnish on them. Loki looked at Ray like 'oh bless, you poor creature' and handed over the money.
He was tempted to haggle on Darcy's (and their budget's) behalf, but it didn't seem like Darcy was in the mood.
"Now then, I believe our business is conducted?" Loki said to Ray, as this wasn't the first trade negotiation he had been to and it likely wouldn't be the last. He inclined his head to Darcy's druggist, as a way of concluding the meeting. "It has been an absolute pleasure to meet one of Darcy's associates. She is such a ray of sunlight. Perhaps your aunt might write a poem about her, someday. I would rather enjoy that. Quite a bit."
Darcy just watched the two of them smile and laugh at each other and shook her head slightly. Oh she knew what Loki was doing, and she wasn’t all that amused by it but she couldn’t actually stop him. As long as he wasn’t a giant asshole to the guy’s face. Ray barely had any idea that Loki was making fun of him. He took the money, and gave Darcy the weed.
She looked happy enough to have it, and then quickly tucked it into her bag and safely away where no one was looking. “Yeah, it’s done. I’ll be over in a couple of days, and we’ll smoke some bowls and watch cartoons, okay?”
Ray laughed. “Oh man, that’s excellent. Lookin forward to it. Nice meetin you, Loki. I’l tell my aunt you said hi.” And he probably would, god bless his little heart.
She gave Ray a hug and then headed out of the apartment with Loki and back down into the car. “Now we’re immediately going home and putting this away so that I don’t get pulled over and go to jail. Sounds good?”
Oh, yes. Loki's ability to be politely condescending was legendary and he had an entire lifetime consisting of one thousand and fifty-two years to perfect such a skill. Ray seemed a rather dubious sort, but blissfully good-hearted despite his illegal profession. Heavy emphasis on the blissful part, as it almost seemed borderline oblivious.
What he didn't like the thought of was that Darcy was spending time with her druggist watching cartoons and smoking bowls. Which did not make any sense.
"As you wish. I would not want you to be in a cell either, as I would be compelled to rescue you." After he got in the car, he looked perplexed and leaned in to study her closely. "Why do you smoke a bowl? No wonder you are an odd creature. Smoking this realm's flimsy pottery surely has taken an affect on you."
“Uh no. You don’t have to do any such thing. I have a plan if I ever get arrested. It doesn’t involve you making a scene.” Because she knew that is what he would absolutely do. And he had no idea how to talk to the police. And they would probably shoot him because he was Loki and had tried to kill a bunch of them once upon a time.
She started the car and headed back towards her place. “It’s just another phrase for smoking the stuff that he gave me. You really gotta stop taking everything so literally.” Good grief. “It means smoke the weed. There’s lots of different ways. One of the ways is through a thing that looks like a bowl.”
"I would think if someone was not from your world, smoking a bowl would be difficult to not to take literally."
Loki shook his head at her, sitting up perfectly straight and staring straight ahead, but periodically chancing a few stolen glances over at her. For a moment, going 'home' seemed so normal a thing to say, that he wished it was where she was staying with them. He wished even more it was what he once knew as home. But as they were heading in a familiar direction, he realized it was where she was currently living with Gamora and Peter Quill. He wisely said nothing about that. There was another topic that kept his mind off their on-again, off-again status.
"Do tell what your grand plan is," he said, curious about what sort of plan a Darcy plan was.
“Well you should stop. You’ve been here long enough,” she said simply. “Ask me about it sure, but y’know.”
It would have been nice if she could have gone back home, to where they both lived together. As much as she liked Gamora and Peter, she was pretty sure that soon she would have to get her own place, and stay just on her own. There was way too much moving in and out of places and then things happening and she would have to find yet another new place. Too much uncertainty.
“I have bail money set aside. And then I do my time or pay off my debt. That’s my plan. Like any normal person would do. Besides pot is going to be legal soon anyway. It won’t matter.” She wasn’t going to share her real plan, so that he could mock it and think she was an idiot. That was not a discussion she wanted to have.
"It sounded ridiculous so it was difficult not to question it, while lightly mocking the notion at the same time. Do forgive me, for not knowing your illegal drug references, Darcy. As well as the fact that this entire realm seems ridiculous, in general."
Unbelievable. And people thought he was rude?
Meanwhile, he truly wanted to ask her to move back in, where they were closer together, and she could smoke a bowl or watch cartoons to her heart's content. He also wanted to tell her that her plan sounded less like a plan and more like capituation with the powers that be. He didn't want to think of Darcy locked in a cell. The sooner her illegal drug was made legal, the better.
"That can't be the entirety of your plan. Because your plan is to do nothing other than what is expected. And you tend to do what is not expected."
Darcy glanced over at him. “Okay. That’s enough. I’m done talking about it if you’re just going to be an asshole about my things and I’m going to get snippy back.” She really hated that they couldn’t seem to be anything but angry at each other. He wanted to push her buttons and she let them be pushed and then gave it right back to him.
“I’m not telling you, because you’re just going to mock me. Like you’ve been doing this whole time. Calling it ridiculous. Lightly mocking. Whatever. Like I said. I’m done. No more discussions.” It took a moment before she was up to the front of the house and pulled up to it. She got out of the car. “Okay. That’s that. You’re free to go.”
Loki got out too, eyes narrowed, lips pressed into a thin line. Why he bothered and put up with this was beyond him. Months ago, he wouldn't have at all. Darcy Lewis was an infuriating woman.
"Oh, please. You've been nothing but snippy to me after you let all and sundry know of what transpired between us. And you expect me to....what, precisely? Laugh it off and forget it, I suppose? I do think I have suffered quite enough over a mistake and misjudgment. Which I have more than rectified. Even Odin's punishments were less vindictive than yours."
He realized they were on the sidewalk in place view, and so dropped his voice down to a harsh whisper.
"What more, you do not get to dismiss me in such a manner. I have not treated you thusly, and never once dismissed you from our home or my presence, even when I sought to tease you. And now I say that you are free to go. End of discussion. That's that. Go forth. Smoke a bowl or whatnot."
Loki pointed off toward the building's entrance, and even twitched his finger toward it a couple of times. There. She can go that way. He is now striding off in the direction of his home, in a tempermental huff.
Maybe she had been a bit snippy towards him, she could concede that. And she knew that she’d started it by posting the thing. Then he’d gotten angry, then she kept poking him about it. He really wasn’t letting it go either. They were both completely stubborn and neither one was really going to back down. She knew that. It clearly hadn’t been enough time between what she’d wrote and when they’d seen each other.
Instead she rubbed her face with both of her hands and took a deep breath. God give her strength to do all of this. She didn’t say anything, mostly because she couldn’t get a word in edgewise, even if she wanted to. She just let him finish and when he dismissed her, she just turned on her heels and went inside. If he wanted to have the last word and everything, then he could. She was really really tired of fighting.