Jane Foster (science_fact) wrote in avengers_logs, @ 2020-03-27 19:24:00 |
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Entry tags: | -complete, -rating: red, jane foster, thor odinson |
Who: Jane and Thor
What: Thor and Jane have been avoiding each other since the fight. Time to deal.
When: A few days after the party
Where: The Norway house
Warnings: Red for mention of medical issues
In the days since their party, Jane thought things between herself and Thor would go one of two ways: either they would resume fighting or they would make up. Instead neither thing happened. They entered a state of non-speaking that was almost impossible to resolve with the way Thor developed a new ability to vanish. He was still coming at home at night, Jane was pretty sure. There was a sense of someone sleeping beside her, a dent in his pillow in the morning, and the occasional coffee cup in the sink in the morning. But he was gone when she got up in the morning and not back when she went to bed at night. For days.
Jane was trapped alone in the house while he was out. She could go out into the village, of course, but the chances of running into Thor that way seemed high and since he was avoiding her, that seemed like a bad idea. So she was stuck in an empty house, trying to find enough work to keep busy and waiting to see if Thor was going to come back when she was actually awake.
When there seemed to be no sign of Thor coming back around after a few days, Jane wasn’t sure how much longer she could wait. She didn’t work into the night much anymore but once an astronomer, always an astronomer. Jane made an evening pot of coffee and sat up in bed with a scientific journal. At some point Thor would come back. She could wait up for him.
The conversation Thor had with Loki had really eased his mind. Although it wasn’t anything new, it was a good reminder that things could be sorted out...the problem being that he would have to apologize and really Thor wasn’t sure what he would apologize for.
Well. That wasn’t true. He knew he needed to apologize. He just couldn’t think of how exactly to do it.
Coming home while Jane was awake would be a start.
Coming home with a fresh bag of black and white cookies, straight from New York would also be a good thing.
Again though, he would have to use his words….and that wasn’t his strong suit.
“You’re awake,” he said lamely even though he was hoping she would be. “And you have coffee. Does this mean you will not be sleeping tonight? If not, I have cookies. You could eat them now. In bed even. It wouldn’t bother me.” Wait, did that insinuate that he would be sleeping in the bed? He had been ...but maybe she was angrier than he thought.
“If you wanted me in bed with you that is.”
Yes, that saved the conversation.
It seemed that both of them had reached the limit of how long this could go on. That was an encouraging sign - although she supposed, he could have expected her to be asleep and the black and whites for him. But it felt like something. They weren’t usually very good at being in a fight.
“You’ve been to New York.,” she said and then waited, giving Thor a chance to settle himself and her a moment to gather the thought that had been churning in her mind while she’d waited. Jane had actually always liked watching Thor getting ready for bed. One the nights he was wearing armor she was fascinated by what pieces he magicked away (“but where does it go? “) and which of the leather and metal pieces he peeled off his skin the old-fashioned way. She liked to watch him manage his braids, taking out or putting in the little decorations. All the little things Thor did that felt like home to Jane. She hadn’t realized how tense she’d been this week not having those little signs of him.
“You can stay but I think we both know we have some things to talk about. I have some things I want to say.” Jane set down what she was reading. She did not take a cookie. He wasn’t going to like the way this began but Jane didn’t know how else to start.
“When I was sick, everything got a lot smaller, The world kind of shrank down to just you and me. Our own bubble.” It might have sounded romantic but Jane’s tone was more flat. These weren’t happy memories. “I’m not saying that was bad. It had to be that way because we were together all the time. It was the only way we survived it. But coming out of that - it hasn’t been easy coming out of that bubble. Now you’re here with your family and your people and you’re home and I’m still trying to figure out what my work and my life looks like and that hasn’t been so easy for me.
“But,” she continued, “I always understood that staying in New Mexico was just temporary. You have a life and responsibilities and a mess of things that can’t be ignored forever. And because I’m on your side, I accept that means I have to build my life around that. I thought that was clear when Loki came to see us but I guess not.”
To say that Jane had blindsided him was an understatement. Thor stood there in their room, just looked down at her, blinking as she talked. Everything she said made sense which made this whole prolonged argument feel as dumb as ever.
With a gentle shake of his head, he chuckled softly to himself. “Oh my love,” he said, slowly sitting down on the edge of the bed. He would undress later. Right now, he wanted to soak in the fact that she wasn’t yelling at him. “I did not think of it in those terms. Being so insular, it did give us a bubble that I truly enjoyed. The circumstances were, of course, less than ideal but the peace and solitude it gave me … it made me yearn for more.”
He cleared his throat.
“And that was selfish of me. I want you with me forever...and yet I know that it is a desire, rather than a reality. I also spoke with my brother … he confirmed that both he and his lady wife are prepared to continue providing assistance and being regents until the time I wish to take the throne.” What was left unsaid was that that would most likely happen after Jane’s passing … Thor only hoped it was more natural than a wasting disease.
“In addition, a Midgardian ceremony would be sufficient enough and our children would be recognized as my heirs.” Another clear of his throat, and this time he got up, to start fiddling wit his armour. This wasn’t really how he wanted this conversation to go, but it was inevitable. “I know you said I have never really asked...and I thought I had. I apologize for it.” Now he was fumbling with his chest straps, not looking at her. “And I wanted to -- want to -- and still do. It seems silly though to go through some sort of ritual when you know how I feel … so maybe, you should perhaps simply tell me when you’re ready to ...move onto whatever next step you so desire.”
Why couldn’t he get the stupid strap off?
“So I shall leave it to you.”
“I want you to know,” Jane told him, “that I did think about being Queen. A lot actually. After I talked to Loki, I knew that saying no would mean probably no apple. It would have been really really easy to say yes. It’s still something I think about but your people who have been through a lot and they deserve someone who understands them and their traditions. And I’m a scientist. I don’t know how to be anything else. I’d be bad at it.” The corners of her mouth turned down and she looked regretful.
Jane stood and crossed over to Thor. He could easily magic away the chest plate if he needed to but for all his power he was still sometimes such a man. He wore his emotions right on his sleeve. Jane knew the way Thor’s armor buckled together and her hands moved to start undoing the straps for him.
“I thought it was me being selfish. You were always vanishing into space. Marriage seemed like a way to trap you into staying here.”
Thor dropped his hands and let Jane minister to his clothing. He didn’t have an answer to her because he knew that yes, back then, he probably would have felt it was selfish. He would have done it, his love for her was that strong, but at what cost? Their relationship would have suffered, and it wouldn’t have actually stopped him from travelling or doing what he needed to do for the realms.
No, things had had to progress the way they had to get to this point.
“I have no wish for you to change who you are,” he said quietly. “I love you, Jane Foster, for your soul, for your entire being. And you being a scientist… I could no more take that away from you than I could make you any taller.” His lips quirked slightly, and he reached out to brush a strand of her hair. “I enjoy watching you work, the passion that enters you when you have a calculation or problem to solve. The joy in your eyes when you have data to compile. It’s beautiful and it’s you and I want that.”
His hand moved to cup her cheek, his thumb gently stroking her face. “You will always be the queen of my heart … you do not need to be anything else.”
“Oh short jokes, hilarious,” said Jane, though even her mock irritation couldn’t hide a smile. And speaking of, she made short work of the armor and helped Thor lift the breastplate away. Once it was safely on the floor, Jane slipped her arms around his waist and looked up at him. “And you, Thor Odinson, are a good man.” In every way that counted, that mattered so much more than being a god. “I love you.”
It always pleased him to hear his name from her lips, rather than all the titles he had. It reminded him first and foremost that she saw him as a man, not some god like figure.
"And I you." Looking down into her eyes, he gave a small groan as he pulled her closer. "Are we finished arguing? I hate when this happens. I much prefer when we get along."
Jane's hands come up to tangle in his hair and pressed closer to Thor, back arching. "I think we're done arguing. We're not even close to being done making up."
Thor gave a low laugh, leaning down to brush his lips across hers. "Well in that case…..we best be getting started, no?"