InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "where's the beef!"

Steve Rogers is (_shieldless_) wrote in avengers_logs,
@ 2019-05-20 10:30:00

Entry tags:

-spoiler, peggy carter, steve rogers

Spoilers
Who: Steve and Peggy
What: Dream a little dream of me.
When: Sunday night
Where: Their apartment
Rating: Green...will update if necessary.

There were dreams and then there were Dreams. After everything Steve was getting to know the difference. That's why he knew that when he lived through time travel, grabbing up the Infinity Stones in the past and everything that followed after...he knew it was a Dream. Unlike any of the other times when Steve woke from it he was...happy. Honestly, happy. You'd have to know him to understand.

His heart pounding beneath a heaving chest, Steve caught his breath with baby blue eyes wide and staring at nothing. The Dream had to be processed, broken down and looked at thoroughly but right now he couldn't look at anything but one particular point.

"...Peggy?"

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theagentcarter
2019-05-21 03:42 pm UTC (link)

There wasn’t even a satisfying number to put to the amount of nights Peggy had dreamt about him coming home. Countless, endless, always waking to the same empty bed and a sweat and tears depending how long of a day she had had before. But she hadn’t had any of those dreams since arriving. At least not til now.

It was different, in her chest, in her heart, her brain, whatever, it was not the normal dream she had become so used to. She heard his voice, his real voice, which snapped her eyes open and she looked at him instantly from where herhead had been on his chest. “What was that?” She whispered, cautiously. “It felt... real?”

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_shieldless_
2019-05-21 04:01 pm UTC (link)

Steve carefully wriggled to sit up without dislodging her too much. He was wide awake now. No doubt she would be in a moment, too.

"It was and it wasn't..." He wasn't good at this. Dr. Strange was better at it. Steve only understood so much. He just knew this was how it was. "That was a...projection? What do they call it...an upload? Download. Something like that. Anyway it's what IS in the reality we came from."

Which meant they'd gotten their happy ending. They'd gotten their dance.

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theagentcarter
2019-05-21 10:06 pm UTC (link)

She moved with him seamlessly as he sat up, her own brain trying to scramble and make sense of... all of that. "It's what..." Her brow furrowed for a moment and maybe it was because she was fresh from sleep, or because her body was so used to waking up and crying over him, that it just happened on autopoilot. But either way, her eyes suddenly filled to the brim and she threw herself against his chest, taking deep steadying breaths as if just feeling him would calm her down.

He'd come home. It wasn't just luck that they found each other again, it was real. And she felt relief, not for herself, but for her other versions that she knew had still been waking up in a sweat and looking at men in their bed that weren't Steve, and feeling their heart ache. That wouldn't happen anymore and it was bloody ridiculous really, that it caused her to cry. But here she was, wiping at her face as she pulled away from him embrace, voice only a little wobbly.

"I love you so much." She said softly before pulling away to kiss him deeply, holding the sides of his face like she was mildly afraid he might evaporate from under her touch.

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_shieldless_
2019-05-21 10:41 pm UTC (link)

Panic replaced the warm feelings left from the dream. Peggy was crying! No! That wasn't supposed to happen! He'd heard it in her voice before he put the plane into the ice. One of his last thoughts had been that Peggy should never cry. He wanted to make it stop. He HAD to make it stop! But what do you do when there wasn't anything to punch of yell at? Flail internally, that's what.

But then there was kissing and expressions of undying love. Baffled, Steve returned the kiss as his arms held her close. He had to come up for breath, however. "I love you, too. Why are you crying?"

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theagentcarter
2019-05-21 11:03 pm UTC (link)

A small blip of a laugh escaped her as she watched him inhale, reaching up to run her fingers through his hair affectionately. “I’m happy, I’m ... I guess I just pushed the thought out of my mind that there were other ... versions? Of me... who were still living without you and I know...” She looked down and swallowed before looking back up at him fondly, her voice far meeker than it’d ever becaround anyone but him. “I know how devastating that is, even if I learn to live with it later. I’m... thankful there’s at least one other me who isn’t feeling that way every day.”

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	_shieldless_ 2019-05-21 11:23 pm UTC (link)
	That just about broke his heart to hear. He had always pictured her the pillar of strength and continuing on, but he realized now that that was probably his own wishful thinking to assuage his guilt. "I'm glad I found a way back to you," he said in an earnest tone. "I'm sorry you had to go through that." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

theagentcarter
2019-05-21 11:39 pm UTC (link)

Peggy, to the outside world, held it together valiantly. She didn’t break down and cry at her desk, she rarely got caught looking at his things, and she did her best to become more than Cap’s Girl. But that Peggy was a lot different from the one with no makeup on, curled up in bed with a book alone. Steve was the only person she let her guard truly down with.

She leaned to press herself against the muscle of his chest, her hand resting on his stomach as she breathed. “It’s okay. It was your choice and you saved the world, more than once. Even if you hadn’t found a way back... giving up the world for me is a terrible misjudgement.”

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	_shieldless_ 2019-05-24 03:20 pm UTC (link)
	Steve took her hand to lift it so he could kiss those pretty knuckles. "We have each other now. That's what matters. Not the dreams or memories or whatever they are." Which was a good thing, not just because he had her back but also because Nat and Tony were alive. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	theagentcarter 2019-05-30 01:27 am UTC (link)
	Peggy was good at quite a few things but one of her most prized, yet secret, talents was being able to read Steve like a book. She squeezed his hand and breathed deeply. "What else do you see? There's something else isn't there?" Her face showed a range of emotions but the main two were fondness and worry for him. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	_shieldless_ 2019-05-31 10:10 pm UTC (link)
	He sighed as he lowered his eyes then gave a small nod. Steve didn't mind that she could read him. No one else seemed to have the talent, other than Bucky. "Yeah," he said quietly. "We lost Nat and Tony. Permanently." (Reply to this) (Parent)