"And I can't say that I blame him for not knowing things about a future he couldn't predict either." Emmett said, his voice firm. "There were quite a few other factors in play. You spent ten and a half years raising me on your own. And Jack was around for several years of that, and we both..." He took a breath, and reached down to pat Scout, who had settled by his feet.
"We weren't the easiest pair of kids to raise. He spent his early childhood in an asylum and blamed Father for some things..."
"For his mother's death." Jacob said, wincing. "And I did try to help her, as much as I could, but Jack was young and it didn't make much sense to him that I failed. I do feel badly about...I feel badly about everyone I couldn't help, and about failing some of them more than others, but there IS a point I have to do my best and accept that I have. Some things are out of our power, yeah?"
Jacob's smile was forced and sort of weak as he said that, but it was clear he DID try on that other front.
"Anyway, Jack was...volatile, due to that, Em's got a point. I don't know that I can say it's as easy as that to give myself the slack, I did let some things slip...too many things that I assumed were kid stuff and...well, brothers fight, don't they? My sister and I definitely did. It's part of why...I still can't keep thinking that I could have saved HIM."
And there it came. There was the crux of it. Emmett winced, hearing that tone in Jacob's voice, the one where he was obviously more focused on Jack, even now. Growing up as Jack the Ripper's Little Brother hadn't been easy. Being grown up (or at least eighteen), and realizing your father was still obsessed with ways he could have saved him....that was harder still.
But, Emmett let him say his piece, and then, well. He had things in all of this that he blamed himself for too. If he had only tried more himself, to help Jack, then things might have been different and his father wouldn't be worried about this now. He'd have had more time for Emmett, and would, possibly, not be afraid to train him now.
"There's ways I failed him too, each time he hit me or things." He said, wincing as he admitted the words, pretty sure Jacob wasn't going to like them, and was going to agree.
"I could have told someone else, after everything." He turned to Clarence. "I mean, Father always told me not to be too upset, when Jack went a little far with me, because he'd had a hard life before us, and needed us to be patient and help him, but I should have told somebody else, who could have made him listen. My godfather's a bloody Police Inspector. If I'd told him, made it clearer, then we probably wouldn't be where we are either. I let being afraid of what Jack would do, and disappointing him by telling someone else keep me from speaking up. If I'd helped by getting Jack help, then a lot less of this would be happening now."
He winced, hating that, and bent to pet Scout again, glad she was here for this.
"It's part of why I'm.... I have fits." He explained to Clarence, nodding at Scout's vest, which showed she was an alert dog. "From some head trauma possibly. But that's my fault for not speaking up, some of it. I didn't make it happen, but...I could have halted things if I'd not been afraid." He bit his lip.
"And no, the boyfriend thing...He's had them, since before I got here. The last few models haven't been great, but he's dated around for a bit here and there." Emmett frowned a second. "I didn't even know he'd gotten another after the one he broke up with at Christmas, but then, he got a lovely photograph back a few weeks ago that made it clear he's back on the..."
Emmett paused then glanced at Jacob.
"Did you start to say 'The Iomhar thing'? You two got back together?"
"I..." Jacob glanced down. "Em hated him. His daugher hated ME. When we got back together, we decided we were going to keep in quiet. I...take it that was a bad move?"