Calum Vael (starkhavenlaird) wrote in angellogs, @ 2018-09-07 10:35:00 |
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Current mood: | contemplative |
Entry tags: | !complete, calum vael, noah fon ronsenburg, prince hans |
Who: Noah, Hans, Calum
When: Current
Where: Craigcrook Castle, Edinburgh
What: Calum's following Starkhaven traditions by standing in for Sebastian's father and asking for some work from Noah. Noah's - totally clueless to the idea that there might be some gentle joking involved, but he's willing to bow to tradition.
Rating/Warnings: Noah's got some depression and guilt.
Status: Complete
There’s a tradition in Starkhaven, one Calum DID mention to Noah, that you have to ‘earn’ your bride’s hand by doing...whatever her father asks of you, basically. He did it, visiting in Antiva while the contract was finalized and stomping grapes, and Iomhar did...something with sheep and his father in law and came back smelling like one but grinning like an idiot and...well. There’s Sebastian right in front of them, getting married and there’s NO way that he’s not going to go ahead and use the tradition, even if, really, the gender line is crossed. But that doesn’t REALLY matter, right?
It’s a chance to get to know Sebastian’s groom more, in spite of the fact they’ve been living with Noah for over a year, and well, since their father’s not here, it falls to him anyway. Basically, he’s set up a shredder, and a few things to file. Hans is typing something or other, which he’s picked up shockingly fast, enough to have a bit of backlog but not an insane amount or anything, which is good, and...mostly it’s Calum’s show. He’s mostly looking forward to a chance to hang around with just Noah a bit more. They really haven’t, after all.
Admittedly, part of that was that Noah's job last winter was mostly a graveyard shift one which'd shifted over the summer to being slightly more sociable hours. He's also stayed kind of quiet, sticking to meals and Sebastian, or the gatehouse. Probably his most visible activity, other than the occasional visits to the practice yard, was working on the garden outside, or visiting Aedan occasionally. Still, Noah's on time as he's making his way over.
“Hey.” Calum’s waving Noah in, when he spots him and smiling. “It’s good to see you, honestly.” He smiles. “So I promise not to be TOO intimidating to you.” He hopes.
"I'm not sure that's a comforting way to put it," Noah says, but the smile says he's probably joking. He's wearing a t-shirt, and a fairly comfortable pair of jeans, and it doesn't look like he fretted too much about getting something with long enough sleeves to hide the half inch that's showing of that old scar on his arm. "What'd you like me to start on? Hello, Hans."
Calum waves him in the rest of the way. “Actually I’ve got a pile of things to shred if you don’t mind terribly. Really, it’s more...I wanted to spend some time with you now we’ve been able to make a chance. This seemed as good a thing to evoke as any.”
Hans snorts at that. “Ser Noah.” he adds, turning to him. “I don’t pretend I had anything to do with false pretenses here.” Pretending’s not really come into play.
Noah has to honestly peer at the settings on the shredder and the slightly worrying pictograms of what'd happen if you shoved your hand into the top slot. "No, you did not, Hans. It's good that Calum's got help. I had the feeling it was pleasant having Evan there, but there was still work to do." He can settle for that. "And I am here. My schedule's been easier lately, if you'd like to catch me sometime."
Easier in the sense he's not texting Sebastian between baking, or waking up blurrily at noon and having Sebastian enjoying a nap to wake up with him. And well, there were days that he'd want to be anywhere other than the gatehouse, evading his reflections or Basch.
Calum eye darts a little. “Evan still has his uses. In other applicable areas.” And he grins. “He’s actually moved up a little. Since you two are going official, I’ve got him scouting out places in the downtown. Venues for handling the crowd control for the big official thing you don’t actually have to be a major part of. I think you’ll probably get people thronging the streets if you do anything off the land, and you might have to wave at reporters, but there’s something in the works to let the two of you and whoever else you want have some privacy to celebrate. “
He’s got Evan on that now, since he definitely gets that need for protecting privacy and the rest. “He’s got his own little group of people to organize. He’s good at it, so…” So there they are.
“Delegation.” Hans grins. “AND I found this ridiculous game where a dog teaches you to type the most insane ‘modern’ phrases that I think is meant to be some social commentary we’re both missing so I’m fast now.” It’s weird how much he likes that fact.
"A dog teaches you to type. I wonder if Shaun would be interested in it. I know Balthier said one of the younger people at his place are learning about programming." Which doesn't mean they know how to type quickly. The shredder sounds halfway between something dangerous in a Cid's laboratory and a lawn mower. Not horrible. "Crowd control. I know Sebastian was saying he wanted some grove on the property or something like that for just - something with a smaller group." For the ceremony involving ribbons and whatever else. Probably more decorations than Noah would like, and probably careful rooms set aside for the Assassins and the Templars.
At least he'd get his flowers, hopefully.
“Cool Dog. Which might or might not be spelled correctly.” Hans eyedarts. “I’m in the midst of other programs at the moment to go with it, so I may be getting that wrong. And I could pass that along.” Admittedly, he’s been avoiding much to do with people who know Aedan because it means dealing with Aedan, who keeps eyeing him like he’s some kind of snack and it’s a little odd. NOT that that’s something to tell NOAH though. He figures eventually it’ll get worked out.
Calum’s oblivious too, so he’s nodding at that. “That sounds ideal, really. It’ll keep everyone away from any kind of weird chaos and people. And Hari won’t have to have a conniption over security. As much of one.” He pauses. “We’ve got decoys at home for that, usually. But that’s for the walk out to the wedding location, usually outside a chantry door, and they all dress mostly the same so no one makes any sudden movements. Not that people TEND to now. But you CAN have fun with it, if you’re a close friend.”
And he smiles. “Which means that you’ll also have a lot more room to do whatever the two of you want, going for it like this, without having to plan around eventualities.”
"I can bring it up to him," Noah offers. "I know Shaun can be intense." Admittedly, part of that was that he was understandably scared of people. Sometimes Noah has the feeling that he only really relaxes because the two of them know each other understand some of the fear and aren't trying to pose that much. Or he isn't. "And - Sebastian didn't mention decoys. I think he said he never saw a full wedding, not with his family."
And the ones that Noah remembered were when he was younger, with wars raging around Landis. "What do you mean by eventualities? Children?" Since Sebastian did say they'd normally have an honor guard glued to them for bits of this. Though Noah's pretty sure Iomhar's still trying to figure out how often they're spending time together versus just sleeping.
“He hasn’t, no.” Calum sighs. “The terms of his being away made that perfectly clear at the time and it was…” He shakes his head. “We tried, both of us, or to see if they would let him DO it, but not with our parents. They said he’d been exiled for a reason, after all.” Which is...ugh, honestly. He’s not okay with it but up to a point, they couldn’t have done much.
“And more of the ones to do with an actual wedding. You know, if you have such and such, you need extra bits of whatever and…” He eyedarts. “The fiddly things get fiddlier the more people you involve. Mine was a real pain in the arse and years in the planning. Hari’s was a lot simpler and happened faster. I was more than a wee bit jealous of that.”
Noah glances at him. He's - confused. Maybe Calum means something like massage oil for an older achy groom? He could see that. "I can imagine. It's one reason why I wanted to keep things fairly quiet, as much as we can. I'm not - marrying into too much, and deliberately so." No rank, beyond oaths to the concept of Starkhaven. No familial money. No title. "I'm trying to . . . not demand too much."
More like arrangements and people and large groups lead to problems. He nods. “That IS exactly what I mean, aye. And whatever you DO want, it’s between you and Sebastian, though aye, we’re not at all what we once were. Well, the important parts. We’ve still got THOSE.”
"Aye?" Noah blinks at him. "As I told Sebastian, I just - I know it's foolish, but the flower crowns would make me happy."
“See, it’s the things like that that are important for you to say.” Calum smiles. “It sounds quite nice, all things considered. And likely not something that would come up as a problem anywhere I can think of, but...that’s the sort of detail I mean. You’ve got more freedom doing it up this way.”
"I suspect I'd want freedom either way," Noah admits. "I tend to follow the rules mostly because I'm a stubborn angry man at times, and they're a good a way as any to have some say in things. But - yes. I don't feel trapped by fate here." Or Calum wants to be wistful about his marriage? Noah always finds it hard to read between the lines. Some of that is Calum's simply nicer than people like him, in Noah's experience.
Not quite wistful most of the time. It was a long time ago, and Calum’s...not quite moved on, but it was an unexpected blessing, what had looked to be a pain.
“Freedom. You know, I was glad here, to have that, for the title not to matter? All of THIS is nice. I’m glad we’re able to survive and thrive and all of THAT, but the lack of responsibility in that way is a blessing.”
"I fear that I would have -" Noah shakes his head. "Your parents would not have found me charming, I fear. Some of their ideas do not seem to be mine."
“No, they likely would have disliked you. Well, then again.” Calum squints. “It would depend upon your ability to put up and to shut up. They were never unkind to Briant, and he was certainly a bit...rough around the edges. Then again, he WAS with Iomhar, who got away with...quite a lot. I think because he followed the pattern laid out for him, Hari, they didn’t have to involve themselves in forcing it. If you had said something, though? Aye, they’d not have.”
There was a lot of putting up, shutting up, and waiting for his father to die, honestly. Not that Calum wanted it, but it WAS an odd professional reality that he could become his own person at that moment in time, at least publically.
Noah shrugs slightly. "I've watched my words." He probably should be more chatty about that. "It was not the most pleasant."
Calum nods. “And no one should live like that if they have a means to avoid it, no.” He says. “But my parents aren’t here anymore so that IS something at least as far as Sebastian’s happiness is concerned.” And as the three of them are concerned now, really.
"They made a good son and his siblings, I can give them that." Noah shrugs a little. "But aye. He is happy, here, and they are spared a stubborn Landisser stealing all of you he loved."
“Sebastian’s definitely the best one out of us.” Calum says, nodding. “I’d say that’s down to the chantry more than anything else. “ He looks thoughtful. “I mean, we turned out all right but that’s more luck than anything else. Sebastian...I have to say the grand cleric he loves so much had a hand in that. “ Which sounds odd because a lot of her seems manipulative as hell, in that way that chantry leaders HAVE, but…
“It’s complicated.” he says. “In ways Sebastian hasn’t picked up on because she meant so much to him, but...I suppose it’s like if you’ve got someone in your life who is kind to you while they’re also twisting you around emotionally. Damaging, but maybe some of it’s turned out to be all right. I’m glad he’s not there anymore, if he was unhappy and changed after seeing parts of the real world.”
"He's - implied to me that she wasn't . . . the best. And it was hard for him to miss her and mourn her while realizing that." Noah looks thoughtful. "I can imagine. I had hoped I was making good choices, and put my trust in people, and found it false. We got to talking."
Hans winces a little at the conversation because, sure, he’s been there in part. Admittedly, more with what Calum is describing as what seems to be his experience, the putting up and shutting up to look good, and...maybe that’s why they’re so closely aligned already. Calum reminds him a LOT of Lars.
“And this is depressing.” Calum says. “So, really, the reason I brought you here wasn’t so much to shred papers or talk about depressing things. I more just...feel as if I barely know you and we should make a start at fixing that. Is there anything about you personally, anything really important that isn’t relegated to painful confessions that I should know about or might find interesting? Or hobbies? I keep meaning to do some swordwork with you, but..about the only thing I find I know is that you’re now a talented baker and you read a lot.”
"There is something cathartic, about it, I suppose." Noah smiles at him. "And we can do swordwork. With a spotter to make sure we don't overextend each other. And - I'm not sure. I did enjoy gardening and baking when I was younger. Do you and your brother read a lot? Should I plan on trying to figure out what books you two like? Sebastian seems happy digging through what I read, and Basch's taste in adventure." And romance, but well - people likely know that.
“I do, aye.” Calum says. “And I’ve got my music, but...tales too. Of all sorts. I don’t quite have the mindset for science fiction in a lot of cases, but I do think I need to be eased in a bit more. The Star Wars novels are easy enough to follow, even though some aren’t the best. I think the ideas translate easily enough for me to have some mental picture of it all. But otherwise histories, of nearly anywhere...social things. Iomhar and I’ve been talking of our own historical sort of inspired by our family tale.”
"I - dread a little how that will go, but it's a harmless enough thing, I suppose." Noah could pass on appearing in it, but really, if it's a man who's faintly like him, in love with a man who's faintly like Sebastian, is it hurting anyone? "As for . . . hobbies -" Noah frowns. "I enjoy the little reading room? We've made it cozy. And it is pleasant, bringing lunch to Sebastian. It's . . . peaceful, finding that I have time, and he wants to spend it with me." Something in the loneliness of going from work to work, and always having to be the one to hunt down someone's time and comfort - that seems to have sunk in for him.
“Oh, it’ll be a bit before we get to our generation if we go so far as that.” Calum assures him. “And you’ll be unrecognizable in any form if you do show up. We’d ask too, of course, to see what you would like, and who’s to say we’ll be good?” He shrugs. “I’d like to be but it’ll be a lot of learning in the process.”
The reading room? He likes that too, and smiles.
“Having that time is always nice. You definitely appreciate the finest things.”
Noah feels a guilty stab mostly leaning toward being selfish, but he hopes it doesn't show. "It's - pleasant? I don't think I've had this much free time in years." He should say something. "Your story will likely be interesting. Have to write it, after all to know if you like it."
“No?” Calum nods. “I know that feeling all too well. Mostly, I’m just glad that I’m not leading anyone into death anymore. I hated being prince. The reality was terrible. I can think of no benefit to come from my time doing it. Years of training and yet...I did fall short. “
No one else lost the kingdom and two spymasters and several valuable soldiers, after all. At least a Vael had still ruled after, but he’d been a plant and Calum had KNOWN that his many generations ago ancestors had spent the majority of his rule spinning in their graves. At least, it was mercifully short.
He smiles at the last bit though. “Aye, we do. We’ve got ideas we’ve been trying to suss out.” It’s what they do in the evenings now.
"I'm not sure that's fair on yourself. A country doesn't have a coup via the actions of one person, or a hundred." Noah shakes his head. "I helped a country fall, and I was a kid in one while it was falling. I didn't blame the Landisser soldiers, or the Archadian ones when they showed up, because it wasn't purely their actions that caused it. My brother does that, by my own accusations that I tried to take back. Assuming that he should've known that after several assassins, one would've gotten through, in a conspiracy, and kill the man he was trying to protect."
Noah's maybe - halfway done? He thinks. "How have the ideas been going?"
Calum nods at that. He can’t blame the soldiers in Starkhaven either, that’s the thing. They definitely were stuck in a bad situation. He was supposed to be the smart one, but, well. Some things pass you by, he guesses. Being only a person isn’t an excuse against the responsibilities of a crown. Thankfully, he doesn’t have to worry now, at least. It’s easier to be a person, by far.
“That DOES sound difficult, with Basch. After all, it’s not as though he could know who or when.”
Noah nods. "We're trying to rebuild something. Basch wants us to have something like what we did." He shrugs slightly. "I tell myself he means that, but that doesn't mean my mind believes it." And it's hard as well, that he yearns for . . . something. It makes all those years of being angry that his brother left, and angry that Landis was gone, sort of - hurt again, and at the same time, he could see that it was an angry child just wanting the familiar things he used to have.
“He likely does mean it.” Calum says, seriously. “And well. Sebastian and the two of us...I think if anything there’s an example of what...of how things CAN work. He had every reason in the world to keep resenting us. It was hardly something we caused, but not something we protested either. We were old enough, adults, that we should have tried harder to keep him from the chantry, honestly. But here...well, we’ve gotten that chance. Perhaps time...though it’s hard to see from my end of things at least, too.”
"Aye. And the least I can give him is my best effort and time." Noah's concentrating on his work, since that's simpler. Was this what Calum wanted? Noah can't tell. Admittedly, mostly Calum just reminds him of the older noblemen stuck trying to find a way in their rank to be sure someone beneath them was all right, or organizing convenient meetings while trying to figure out if you've actually slept that day. It's . . . odd, recognizing that some of that wasn't great. You made bad choices in wartime, but they too had bad options.
“Which is more than fair, I’d say.” Calum says, nodding. “Time helps with the rest.” And it’s close enough, really. “The thing IS, with all of this, I mostly wanted to...well, you do a good job pretending you ARE all right, don’t you? That’s rhetorical. “ He adds, with a bit of a smile. “But really, if you do ever need anything...it’s going to be DIFFERENT now. You’re going to be FAMILY soon.”
Okay, family must - mean a lot, beyond duty to Starkhaven. Noah never really thought about it. He didn't have relatives near him, so they were a tiny group, with his mom sick so much of the time. "Versus the year I spent leaving nearby? It's - different for me, I fear. And I guess - I still try to hide things. My face is terrible at it." Which is weird, thinking about it. If his overly showing face with too many emotions is hiding things to other people?
“Well.” Calum blinks at that, a little surprised but he can’t exactly make Noah change his mind here, so that’s fine. He can...deal with that. After all, a lot of things here COULD be worse, couldn’t they? “If you change your mind about that first part, you do know where to find us.” The rest of that though? He can help with it. “Aye, it IS terrible at hiding things. And Sebastian’s a terrible liar, but with him, it’s in his voice. So between the two of you, I suppose there are some tells.” He shrugs a bit. “Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Just...noticeable. “
"I'm not sure . . . what needs I can ask for." Noah makes a face. "That's not just that you and your brother came from terrible things to here, and it is very different. It's also -" He shrugs. "I have work, and money to support my brother, and time that is not work and things to devote myself during them. It's . . . good. I can't imagine chasing you down and whining about how I should buy socks, and I can't think of things that aren't things like that. Does that make sense?"
“Well, when I say anything, I mean it, but I also suspect it won’t come to any of that because you ARE self sufficient and Sebastian would make a poor husband for you if he didn’t try to deal with things like that in any case, but it means more than that.” Calum tries to explain. He’s wondering where with this he’s made a mistake in communication. “I’d think, more likely, it may come to questions you have, or anything on those lines.”
Noah frowns. "I fear my first impulse is to assume you're worried I might not know what to do on the wedding night."
He is trying to think of another option. "Do you know what meals Sebastian likes the best? Or you? That would be nice to know. I've got guesses, of course, but that's not the same as what you might know."
“In that regard?” Calum laughs a little. “I’m hardly the person to advise you on THAT, I am afraid. My own wedding night was a bit of a disaster if you will. And my parents managed to marry me to another like myself so that...as much as someone might be prepared...neither one of us truly WAS. So I assume so long as you’ve done ANYTHING so far, you’re better off than the pair of us were. I mean, we learned what we were doing, but the first few months were very...awkward and odd.” He ducks his head a bit, not so much embarrassed now, but it IS delicate, really. “I’m hardly the one to speak to that, in any case. Iomhar, if you’re wanting THAT advice but I suspect somehow it’s hardly necessary. “
Then again, considering what Sebastian and Noah’s first impulse regarding a new mattress was, if Iomhar’s not exaggerating the tale, anyway…
“Foods I can help with. Especially here. I’m fairly sure there’s no form of savory pie, or anything savory that has pie in its title he doesn’t automatically love. Probably a holdover. We do a lot of pastry of the sort, in the city. Well…” He glances over at Hans. “Gregg’s is usually a LAST resort for that.”
“I LIKE Gregg’s.” Hans protests, amused. “They do a thing for the holidays here. With a calendar and coupons. And offended people last year with...some religious imagery replaced with one of their rolls. Anyone with that kind of a sense of humor…”
Noah blinks. Admittedly, he tends to find grocery stores to be weird places filled with tons of noise and lots of cardboard boxes containing things that don't look like the contents. Balthier tends to happily throw himself into it like it's a new shipment of rations with jumbled labels. Noah tends to just buy the shopping list and get very flustered when he hits up smaller stores that thankfully put food in bins like normal people. They remember him, a lot of the time. On the other hand, he got paid to do a cake when one of the workers had a wedding.
"I think I've had something from Gregg's?" Noah's pretty sure he has. "And I can do pies. I know he and Aedan like the little egg tarts I make." He's pretty sure Aedan only refuses them when he's pretty sure his stomach won't handle them and he doesn't want to taint them with that. Or something. He likes Aedan looking healthy and happy and well. Basch is a pretty good example of why.
“He did say those were good, Aedan.” Calum nods. “Which was a relief at the time, considering his gag reflex.” It’s still an ongoing thing, but he’s working on it, which is good. And at least it’s a texture thing as opposed to being actually lactose intolerant or anything. “Sebastian said the ones with the onion topping that you tried a few times were especially nice.”
And he’s smiling. “Remind me to show you sometime, how to do the shapes for the handpies we have all around the city. It works with any dough, but there are animals and…”
It’s kind of bizarre actually, that they use that system, in this day and age, but, then again, fish and chicken ARE in the names. The chicken version is also less chicken shaped and more shaped like a feather. Lamb tends to be in a heart and mutton in a circle. When people do vegetable versions, more toward the fall and winter to use preserved ones, which are MUCH nicer than anything made with tinned versions HERE, those usually go for more of a half moon shape.
"I guess it would help in a bakery to be sure you're actually getting something close to what you expect. That'd be nice. I know they were talking about doing handpies as an option for some of the Christmas fairs." Noah frowns as the machine flashes a light at him. "I think - I think the holder thing for the paper strips is full?"
“That’d be nice.” Calum says. “The fairs seem like they’ll be interesting, actually. It was a bit late the year I came here and then last,I was so caught up in getting ready for Hogmanay, I did not pay much attention to the rest. I wouldn’t mind experiencing more this year now that I think the festivals for the new year are in check.”
He hopes they are, fervantly hopes, in fact. And then he glances over at that. “No wonder it stopped making that horrible whirring noise it loves to make.”
Noah checks the little bits on the side of the machine, figures how to open it, and eyes the paper mess. "I'll feed the compost pile, I suppose. Give me a little."
Calum smiles and nods, waving him out. So far, so good. He does feel like he knows a little more about him anyway. As for trying to make him part of the family, well. He hasn’t given up ENTIRELY on that one yet. They do have some time, after all.