Or so she told herself because for Shay that was all she ever had even in her darkest moments. She tried, hard, to think of something positive. It might not have always worked. But she tried her damnest. Shay did agree though that he was killing himself, slowly. Suicidal or not, the drinking and driving, and constant things he did to his body were going to kill him one way or another. She’d been telling him that for years now because he smoked and drank and partied. It wasn’t good for him.
But here he was and he was…asking her for help. Shay’s eyes began to water again as she teared up. She didn’t know what to say. The easiest thing to say was that he needed to stop what he was doing. But that didn’t mean, for him it would be the easiest thing or that it would even work. Clearly if he hadn’t yet but was trying, it wasn’t working and they needed to do something else. But what could they do? What would help him if nothing so far was working and he was trying?
“I…” But nothing came after that, Shay couldn’t find the words to say what needed to be said to him. Honestly, this was the first she was ever hearing about all of this, that he had problems like he did, that he was hurting. She felt lost and confused herself now because she didn’t see it. What sort of girlfriend was she that she couldn’t see him hurting himself as being more than just what it was? God she felt like such a bad person and a failure. If she couldn’t help Albus, how could she help anyone? He was someone she was supposed to love and care for above everyone.
“I don’t know.” She whispered out to him as she tried to find her voice from behind the knot that built tight in her throat. “You don’t have to do it anymore.” She tried as she squeezed him against her, her head buried in his neck now to try and stop her own tears and hide her fears FOR him this time and not of him. “We can fix this. I can help you.” She pulled back a bit sniffling as she did, trying to calm herself bit it wasn’t working very well. “We can fix it Albus. You don’t have to hurt anymore. We can…I don’t know. But we can fix it. I’ll help you. You don’t need that stuff. You never did, and you don’t now. You don’t have to feel alone anymore. You’re not. You have me and the baby now. You won’t ever be alone again.”
Shay buried her head against Albus’ neck and honestly just held him against her. “I love you. We can fix it. You don’t have to do that anymore. I’ll help you through the sickness and we can…we can make it okay again.” They had to because one way or another Albus had to get better.
She pulled back from his neck and looked him over for a moment before trying to remove her tears. "Come on why don't we go upstairs. You need rest more than you need...this." She felt so horrible. She hadn't been there for him but instead condemned him. "It'll be okay Albus, I promise."