Age of Miracles

May 13th, 2008

Age of Miracles

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May 13th, 2008

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Who: Sarena Alexander OTA [Ran?]
When: Afternoon/Evening, May 13 Tuesday
Where: Mansion Gym
What: Ren's trying to figure out what is going on.


There were a few things that were routine in Sarena's life. One of those things was violin practice. The other was beating on a punching bag or finding some form of physical activity in order to burn off some of the energy that she couldn't get rid of any other way. Right now, she was working over the punching bag, trying to make it all make sense.

Her relationship with Ran was turning into what? She wasn't really sure what their relationship was. They were dating. They had slept together. And she wasn't sure what the hell that meant. Things were getting too complicated.

-smack- The bag swung and she realized that her control had slipped because her knuckles started to sting. "Fuck," the word came out as a snarl, yet she just kept on swinging. What did it matter if her hands hurt? Regardless, she was going to be okay.

If she just didn't think about it, everything would be fine. Except that it kept intruding and she found herself reaching out to find out where he was all the time and she wasn't used to being this clingy and it hurt to realize that she couldn't live by herself anymore and that was fucking turning into Carol with the obsessive crap.

Pulling back, she took a breath and made herself stop. Taped hands coming up to rub bear arms. Then they worked their way up to her face. There was no way that she was letting herself become that kind of neurotic about her relationship. It was not happening, just not happening.

Her breathing shuddered, just a testament to how hard she had been working to try and make it stop. Even now, she was wondering where Ran was and what he was doing. "Why the fuck does it matter?" Now she wanted a cigarette to calm her nerves. "Damn it." Her brain hurt and she wasn't sure what exactly to do about it. She wanted to dull the feeling, lose them all together if she could. Yet that meant getting into things she didn't need to be in anymore. Drinking wasn't quite strong enough. A cigarette only took the edge off. But anything stronger was going to make her a zombie and she was supposed to be trying to stay off the heavy drugs.

Sarena rubbed her face again and then just sat down on the gym floor. "This is fucking ridiculous."
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