He reached over and squeezed her hand. “I've been realising that. And I...I wish I could convey how much that means to me that I have someone that understands.” But he was at a loss for words again. At least safe words that he could say, so he would try and show her tomorrow.
Ginny nodded, "I... I need you to know something. I'm still scared. I'm scared to get my heart broken again. I'm scared you will not be in my life. Even if we never... if there is never an us again, you are still my best friend, Harry. You are family, and I have lost enough family for two lifetimes"
He almost kissed her. He wanted to take the pain away, instead he took her face in his hands and ran his thumbs over her cheeks. "Ginerva Weasley, you are stuck with me for as long I am alive and after if I can manage it. I am not going anywhere and If I have to spend the rest of my life convincing you of that I'll set to it like Hercules to his labors" His eyes held hers.
She fought her every instinct to throw herself into his arms. "I... I... I...." she stuttered, her eyes never leaving his. She wanted to say it, but she couldn't. Not until she was sure this was it, and she wasn't going anywhere.
He held a finger to her lips when she saw her struggle. "Shhh, I'll wait for what ever you have to say, you've waited long enough for me I suppose a bit of turnabout is fair play." He smiled at her the one from when they were first dating that was reserved only for her.
"Thank you," she whispered softly. Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes. "I delt with those... those bad memories. For now at least." "There was more than just the one? That involved me? I'm sorry." He resisted the urge to rest his forehead against hers, and instead took bother her hands in his. They were sitting knee to knee now, but he still felt okay for the moment.
Ginny nodded, "When we all thought you were dead, Harry." She shuddered, "Funny, I could deal with it fine until now. But after Mum died, and I just... I remembered thinking I wanted to die right there. I wanted to give up, and just die." She wiped a tear from her eyes.
Harry looked at her and held her hands a bit tighter. "I want to tell you something I should have told you a long time ago but I didn't know how, even now I think I just got the words. He took a deep breath. “Voldemort split his soul into parts and hid them--his diary was one of 7 and that was the reason he couldn't die because as long as on piece remained he was tethered to this--plane of existance however miserable he may be.
“That's what I was doing that year, looking for the pieces, but... he made and accidental one.” he reached up with one hand and traced his scar. “When it became clear that I would have to die to make him mortal I walked into the forest.”
“I saw you, you know, but I couldn't stop because then I might not have gone on. So he tried to kill me and I suppose I did die--but not really. He killed the piece of his soul in me and sent me to the next—place. Before I died the last thing I saw was you and that day in the common room and I was willing to go. That's why none of his spells held after that. Because I gave everyone in the castle the protection my mother gave me.” He took a breath and continued, “I had a choice then, to stay and go on, or to come back and I wanted to live--somehow I lost sight of that recently.”
“Gin,” he said his voice earnest, “ Don't worry about your Mum, death isn't scary for those of us with souls. It's a place of comfort. Mine was Kings Cross.” He smiled a bit, “I bet your Mum's is a huge kitchen with people to feed and Dumbledore is there right now eating her steak and kidney pie” He relaxed feeling strangely better, but he glanced at her worriedly, In his rush to get it out, he realised belatedly that it was a lot to take in. "Gin I'm sorry I shouldn't have..."