shiv5468 (shiv5468) wrote in adventdrabbles, @ 2007-12-01 23:58:00 |
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Entry tags: | contributor: shiv5468, dec01, fandom: harry potter, year: 2007 |
Dec 01. Harry /Draco, other pairings.
Title: Fellatio considered as one of the Dark Arts
Author:shiv5468
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Harry/Draco
Rating: Nothing graphic
Word count: 1200
Prompt: #1 - photo of Santa hat
Disclaimer: Characters are the property of JK Rowling, et al.
It is unwise to laugh at Dark Arts practitioners – dabblers, really, honestly, your Honour, and it’s not as if I inhaled – so Harry didn’t.
It was a close run thing when confronted with Lucius in a Santa hat, but there was something about the thin lips, and twitching vein on his temple that spoke eloquently of pain to anyone who dared comment, let alone snigger.
Harry was still reckless, and, besides, he reckoned that if he’d escaped without hexing when caught shagging Draco over Lucius’ desk in his private study with nothing more than an admonishment to ‘move the bloody books next time’, then he could get away with asking about The Hat.
“You do know I’m an Auror, right?” he said. “So whoever placed you under Imperius...”
Lucius glared at him, and Harry stepped back, suddenly realising he was closer to death than he had been in twenty years.
“This,” he said, words clearly articulated, “is your fault.”
“Mine?”
“You did suggest to my besotted son that it would be nice if he were to make an effort with your friends?”
Harry nodded.
“He did, to the extent of giving them Christmas gifts.”
“Oh. “ Harry was still clueless, but didn’t press the matter. It would be tactless to break up a Christmas party to arrest the host for hexing an auror, and Draco didn’t like it when he was tactless. He pouted. It was adorable, but only in small doses.
Lucius smirked, his good humour restored by confusing Harry. It was an easy victory, but it was better than nothing.
There was a saying that Aurors were born not made. Draco said that was because you needed to be insane to keep risking your life for ungrateful bastards, most of whom were poor and without influence. Harry thought it had more to do with having insatiable curiosity, and a tendency to poke your nose in where it wasn’t wanted.
He wasn’t going to let the mystery go; he wanted answers. “Draco, why is your father wearing a hat?” (No one said the search for answers had to be complex.)
Draco shrugged. “Dunno. I’ve asked, but he won’t say. He just looked shifty.”
He knew the look in question well.
Harry had once thought that Draco looked shifty, that it was a Malfoy characteristic, but he knew better now, and could spot the difference between basic Malfoyishness and specific, shifty Malfoyishness.
“Oh,” he said. “When I asked him he said something about you being nicer to my friends, and presents.”
Draco, who had been on the point of taking a sip of wine, inhaled, spluttered, and started coughing. “Oh Christ,” he said, wiping tears from his eyes, “I can’t believe... oh Merlin. No wonder he looked shifty.”
He wouldn’t give any other explanation though. Just laughed, and said, “wait and see”.
He was strongly tempted to try pouting himself, and see if that would make information more forthcoming.
When in doubt, or confused, Harry did what he always did, and turned to Hermione for advice.
“Lucius is wearing a hat,” he said.
“And Merry Christmas to you too,” she replied.
“And he won’t say why he’s wearing a hat. And Draco knows why, but won’t say.”
Hermione wasn’t listening to him. She was watching Lucius, and the hat. It was a very noticeable hat, but it wasn’t one that bore continued consideration.
“What did Draco get you for Christmas,” he asked.
“Oh, the usual,” she replied. “You know how it is, people wonder what to buy me, and then they think ‘I know, how about a book?’. That’s if I’m lucky. Otherwise, it’s a book token.”
From that Harry deduced that Ron’s gift was the one that had caused the difficulties.
“I’ve got to go. Lucius promised to show me a very rare book,” she said.
“You be careful.”
“I know how to handle him,” she said confidently.
Harry didn’t doubt it.
His mystery still unsolved, he went in search of Ron. At this rate, he would have to consider retiring. He really wasn’t doing very well.
Ron was standing by the fireplace, with a glass of wine in one hand. He was watching Hermione. She put a hand on Lucius’ arm, and was rewarded with a glare.
“Merry Christmas,” Harry said.
“Don’t you bleeding Merry Christmas me,” Ron said, still watching Hermione. “Your bloody boyfriend just dropped me in it, right up to the neck.”
“This doesn’t have anything to do with your Christmas present, does it?” Harry recognised a clue when he heard one.
“As if you didn’t put him up to it.” Ron spared Harry a quick glance, then returned to watching Hermione.
“I’ve no idea what you’re talking about. He won’t even tell me what he’s given you.”
“A book,” Ron said shortly.
“Well, I can see that’s a bit boring...”
“Not a bit of it,” Ron interrupted. He turned to face Harry, his face red. “It was ‘The Art of Fellatio’, if you must know.”
“And this is a bad thing?”
“It is when your girlfriend finds it.”
“You mean she thought you were gay?”
“I mean that she thought it would be a good idea to try some of the ideas out.”
Harry tried to see why this might be a bad thing, and came up empty.
“I mean that she was bloody good at some of the ideas.”
Again, Harry wasn’t seeing a problem.
“Which was great, and I was just thinking that Malfoy might not be the complete arsehole I’d always thought when it happened.”
Harry didn’t say anything. He didn’t need to. Ron was in full flight.
“She had her mouth round my cock, a finger up my arse, which is the precise moment she popped the question...”
“It’s a bit soon to be thinking of marriage,” Harry said.
“Not marriage,” Ron snarled. “Not THE question, just the question: Would I like to go shopping with her next Saturday?”
“That’s the Quidditch National Cup game.”
“I know. I know. And now I’m going shopping, instead of watching the Chudley Cannons losing 400-nil in a one-sided game. Merlin, Harry, it’s the closest we’ve come to some silverware in years, and now I’m going to miss it.”
“You didn’t say yes?” Harry asked, incredulous.
“It was the only way she’d let me come.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh.”
“I think Draco got Hermione the same book for Christmas,” Harry said.
Ron turned white. “Well, I pity the poor bugger she tries it out on.
“Have you noticed Lucius’ hat?” Harry asked, and they both turned to look at it as it disappeared into the study following Hermione.
Ron and Harry looked at each other, but said nothing. Some things were too terrible to face.
When Hermione and Lucius came back from the study, Snakey was wearing a matching Santa hat.
“Ron,” said Harry. “Can I borrow your book?”
“Yeah, mate,” he replied. “Best of out of the house, or I’ll never get to see Quidditch again.”
NB:- This is a hundred word drabble, after amortisation, sales tax, and the UK/US exchange rate are taken into consideration.