Re: Warded
How am I playing the martyr? You said facts are facts, period, and there is no room for emotions till the facts are taken care of. I said facts can be subjective and biased and that sometimes it's important to take care of emotions before you look at facts. Maybe you need to see facts first but not everyone works that way. Some people have to process their emotions first and just stating facts doesn't help with that! That's what I said about facts not always being helpful. There are some times when it's more improtant to be empathetic than right.
As for this whole stupid arranged marriage debate, you said that pleanty if not the majority of arranged marriages turn into lovely relationships. That is a direct quote. I challenged that, saying that you couldn't possibly know how those historical marriages were based on statistics, because those are staticically the people who are most likely to lie about whether they're happy or not! And yes, I used things I have seen and letters I have read to come to that conclusion. How does that make it automatically wrong? If I have seen and read about people lying about their happiness why wouldn't it make sense that other people would have done that too? That's the bias! If you're saying the majority of marriages are happy based on what historians are told or what people write in polls then you're ignoring the fact that those people have at least a 50% chance to be lying. People lie. Empiralical facts can and do exist, in maths and sciences and things that can be tangible. But I do believe that when it comes to people and their lives all we have are guesses and hearsay. We have to rely on what they tell us and what historians have gathered and guessed from what they heard or were told. You can say for sure that such and such happened on a certain date, but what you CAN'T do is say you definietly know what they were feeling when it happened. You can't.
And that's what this comes down to, isn't feelings. Not everything is logical and simple and easy to categorize. Life is messy an full of lies and mistakes. Life is full of impulsive marriages between people who have only known each other for ten minutes and are clearly not compatible at all.