Kieran didn’t get much time to himself, with all the help he gave around the grounds it seemed like the work of a do-gooder was never done. It was all well and done because his mind kept wandering to one person out of anyone. Jack. It wasn’t a secret Kieran tried to hide, how much he cared for him, but Jacks feelings didn’t seem quite the same. He’d sought the advice of a friend who knew him better than most, not including Jack of course and he knew that there were things they needed to discuss.
As he waited in their shared wagon, he did as he usually did when he had some time to himself. A glass of scotch in one hand and a book in other. These small pleasures were a rarity these days and he vowed to make more time to himself. Lost as he always was in the book he didn’t hear Jack come in until he had almost hoisted himself inside independently. Quickly placing down the scotch and the book he rushed to the door to help him finish the task. “Oi ye be careful now. I’ve healed one too many injuries this week.”
The day shows were nice, it meant things finished early and they had the evening to themselves. Jack had been working on touching up some of the banners that were older and started to fade. It was quite a task considering he couldn’t stand on a ladder and do them as others might, so he had to do bits at a time. Thankfully, with a small bit of space manipulation he was able to keep the banner from further damage when he worked on a specific part.
When Kieran rushed to help him, Jack just laughed. “Come up these steps a hundred times or more.” He said, shaking his head as he backed into the wagon. “Not had a fall in years.” Not since they’d extended the top step a bit to allow him to sit while he reached back and opened the door. “One a’these days I’ll figure a way up without steps. Just ain’t got the power quite right. Don’t wanna end up on the roof by accident or get inside but leave my chair or somethin’.” He mused as he moved to one of the shelves and pulled out the supplies from his bag.
Kieran chuckled at him and nodded his head. “Suppose that’s fair enough, ye know I’m here though when you do need help.” He offered a smile and sat back down on his bed. “Ye know, I’ve actually been wanting to talk to ye. Seems the both of us have been a wee bit busy.” He couldn’t help the Scottish that came out, he didn’t try to mask the accent he’d had his whole existence.
He clasped his hands together and looked over at his long time friend. “I wanted to talk to ye about us, about what’s going on.” They hadn’t discussed boundaries or terms at all and for all Kieran knew, he wasn’t the only person to share his bed. Still, Kieran remained faithful, just as he always had.
Things had been a bit busy. Since ‘the incident’ everyone had been a bit on higher alert. “Yea, everyone’s seemed a bit on the busy side.” He agreed. When Kieran said they needed to talk, he placed his bag on the floor and turned his chair to face the other man.
It had been a couple weeks since he’d talked with Ben. Gotten a perspective on things. He still felt conflicted, did want anyone to say anything bad about him- or Kieran. But, he had at least figured out his feelings a bit more. Felt better about feeling the way he did, hoped God would forgive him.
“Yea, ‘supose we do.” He nodded, a hand running over his trousers.
He didn’t want to start but he knew it was the right thing to do. “I’ve cared about ye for a long time and I didn’t want ye to think that I’ve taken advantage of ye. Of ye and who I am to ye. Times like these are hard because I’ll always be the same.” He gestured to his age and appearance. Sometimes he thought it a curse because there were those who didn’t take his many years of wisdom into account.
“I want ye, I have for a long time. If that’s not something yer comfortable with then I’ll keep my distance.” The idea alone was saddening, to lose a friendship like theirs but it was better to know now so that they wouldn’t have to endure more hurt later.
Jack’s brow furrowed. “What?” He reached up and scratched the back of his head, confusion plain on his face. “Ya think I ‘want out’ or somethin’?” He wheeled a bit closer to Kieran. “Remember, I was the one who kissed you back when.” And then didn’t talk about it for years. “I know I’ve been a bit… new ta this, but it’s just cause… I dun wanna mess anythin’ up.” He pursed his lips and smiled a bit crooked. “I mean, I kinda like ya. I dun know all of what it means yet, but I’d like to see where it’s goin’.”
The smile that crept onto Kieran’s face was large, larger than life itself and he reached across the open space to grasp Jacks hand. “I’d very much like that too. Ye got to promise me something though.” Consent was his number one priority and because this was so new to Jack, Kieran knew he had to be careful.”Ye have to promise me ye will tell me if yer not ready for something. We need honesty between us.”
So many times he’d been in relationships where they weren’t honest with each other and Kieran always regretted the outcome. What had blossomed between them had been curated by decades of friendship and nothing in the world made him want to lose that.
“A’Course.” He nodded, giving Kieran’s hands a small squeeze. “I want this… Jus’ dun wanna disappoint ya.” Jack admitted.
He laughed lightly at that and pulled Jacks wheelchair toward him by the arm. Once close enough, Kieran reached his hand up to cradle Jacks cheek. “Ye could never disappoint me.” He liked looking at Jack this closely, to see all the small things made him who he was. He hadn’t changed much in fifteen years but what had only made him better. “Ye know me Jack, and ye know that ye can ask me anything. I say we enjoy this, don’t ye?”
His thumb came down to clutch Jacks chin and pulled him forward into a short kiss. No pressure, no promise, just a kiss.
“I do enjoy havin’ someone ta keep me warm at night.” He chuckled, leaning into Kieran, a hand reached out and fingers grasped his shirt. “And the kissin’ never gets old.” Jack added, stealing another brief kiss.
Pushing the other man back a bit, Jack wheeled backward and next to his bed. “Oh, ‘fore I forget, Annie said she’s doing some washin’ t’morrow, so anythin’ ya want ta have a cleanin, leave by the door.” He said as he slid off his suspenders and reached down to undo his boots. “Like what ya got on right now.” Jack said, glancing up with a small smirk.
Raising an eyebrow at Jacks suggestion he smirked back and pulled his shirt out of his trousers over his head. He tossed the shirt over to the door. “I see what yer trying to tell me.” He teased, only an undershirt remaining beneath his suspenders. He sat back down at his bed to unlace his shoes and kicked them off on the floor next to his bed.
He stood and walked over to Jack, leaning over the chair to speak softly into his ear. “I think yer clothes might need washing up too.” He leaned back only far enough to fix Jack with a smug grin and raised his eyebrows at the challenge.
“Just takes longer.” He said, pulling off one boot, then the other. Unbuttoning his trousers, he shifted his chair back slightly and grabbed the support rope from it’s hook. Wrapping his wrist in the noose, he pulled himself up and with the other hand, worked his trousers down. It was routine by now, but didn’t make the process any quicker. Once the article of clothing was low enough, he lowered himself back to his chair and slipped them off the rest of the way. He then undid the garter that held his socks up and slipped them off as well. Jack sighed softly as he pulled his shirt over his head.
Pausing slightly, he found himself looking at Kieran undress. He was a sight. Jack remembered catching a glimpse of the man in the showers when he was younger. It had been one of the first times he’d found himself noticing the male form. A small smile crossed his lips at the memory.
His trousers came next, tossing each item over to the door as he removed them. After his undershirt was shed he was left only with his pants. They’d been underdressed around each other many times before but now the context seemed so much different. Falling down onto his knees in front of Jack he placed his hands on his friends legs. There was no pressure there, only the want to be close to him. “I’m patient.” Was his only reply, trying so hard not to be lost in his shy smile.
His tongue absently wet his lips as Jack slowly pulled off his undershirt. He felt a bit vulnerable, sitting there in his underwear. But he wanted Kieran to see him. His hand reached out and brushed across the other man’s hair, “I should probably move out of my chair.” He said softly.
Jack reluctantly pulled his hang back from the angel as he reached up for the rope. Once again, he wrapped the noose around his wrist, this time holding it with two hands as he pulled up. Muscles across his chest and arms tightened as they pulled him out of the chair. Lowering one hand, he used it to pull himself onto the bed instead of going straight up and down as he had before. As he released the rope and hooked it back to the wall, he glanced over to Kieran. “Join me?” He asked, sliding farther onto the bed.
It wasn’t hard to look at Jack, see how he’d developed over the years. The use of his arms had made his upper body strength significant and it showed. He climbed easily into the bed with Jack and began to discover how he felt beneath his finger tips. There was something so satisfying about it and he watched as his fingers moved along Jacks collarbone in fascination. “Ye really are quite stunning.” The words seemed to form and slip past his lips on his own. Usually Kieran was calculated with the words that he spoke, he was careful not to offend but he found that around Jack his defenses were down.
Just doing this was nice, the slow exploration of each other.
Slow was good, it meant that his body being slow wouldn’t be a problem. Kieran had been patient with him that night under the stars as he learned how the nerve damage had affected more than just his ability to move his legs. Though at least he still functioned.
Jack let his fingers explore the older mans abs. “You don’t have to say that.” He said, lowering his lips to place a gentle kiss on Kieran’s shoulder. And hide his expression. Few people in his life had been able to look past his chair. It was part of him that many in society preferred to ignore. Zion had given him an outlet, an acceptance, but even still the wooden contraption defined him. He couldn’t help roustabouts with manual labor, couldn’t run the rides or games or food vendors as they all required movement or access to things above him. He’d been lucky to find a niche he could turn into a show, but outside of those times he worked… it was a struggle to contribute. And that meant even those he called family tended to ignore him when it came to many things. Those he’d seen ‘dated’ in the past, he’d felt lucky that they’d noticed him. He often thought they’d just taken pity on him. Then Kieran says things like that. And part of him wonders if it’s true or if…
Nah, Jack couldn’t let himself think that way about the angel. He knew the man cared for him.
He leaned his head into Jacks as he peppered kisses to his shoulder. “It’s true. I wouldn’t say it unless it was.” He mused, pulling his arms around Jack to pull him closer to his body. It felt nice to hold someone, it had been years since the last time he could do this at will. He hadn’t been closer to anyone than Jack and so he relished the feeling.
His mouth came close to Jacks ear again, this time he let his hot breath dance across his earlobe. “I think about this a lot.” He purred, letting his teeth gently drag along his ear.
A shiver ran down his spine as he slowly became turned on. “I-” He exhaled, arms slipping around the other man as their chests touched. “I-” His heart pounded in his chest, all those fantasies from when he was younger, those nights of feeling Kieran against him as he slept. “I want… more.” He said, brow furrowing slightly as he looked over the other man’s shoulder, realizing his phrasing was a bit off. “I just… I’m not sure… how.” Ben said they’d find a way. But Jack wasn’t sure how it all would work. His cheeks rouged with embarrassment at the confession.
Kieran’s eyes grew wide as Jack struggled to tell him what it was that he wanted. Nerves probably and Kieran didn’t mind doing what he could to calm them. He pulled back from Jack a little to look at him in the eyes. Quickly he pressed his lips to Jack, hoping it might help him feel a little more calm. “Ok. I’m going to show ye something, and ye have to promise me, ye will do as I say. When yer ready we can try with ye, ok?”
It seemed so cold and calculated but when someone was inexperienced like Jack was it was kind to let them know what they were going to do. “First let’s lay down, yeah?”
He hummed at the kiss, it always helped. “Okay.” Jack nodded. “I trust ya.” He did. Kieran had been there for him for years. He’d only ever been kind and caring to him. Gave him no reason to doubt.
Jack laid back, eyes watching Kieran curiously as he looked up at him. “‘Kay.” His heart pounded with anticipation, he almost felt like he did the first time… when he’d trusted the experience of the dancing girl. But this time, there were real feelings behind his trust- not just young lust.
Kieran laid down next to him and greedily grabbed at his hips to pulled him forward. He then grabbed Jacks hand and pushed it behind him and down the back of his pants. They could come off easily once they were ready. He leaned forward to press a kiss to his neck, peppering them up until they reached his ear. “I want ye to press yer fingers inside of me. Start with one then we can put another in.” The most he had was three but it always seemed like just enough.
He nipped at his earlobe before leaning back again to regard him eye to eye. “Can ye do that?” He asked because it was all about what he was comfortable with.
Jack nodded, fingers grasping the firm buttock before reaching lower. It took him a moment to find where he had to go, but once he did, he carefully pressed his middle finger against and then into the hole it found. “Like this?” He asked, chewing on his lip slightly. It wasn’t quite the same as the ‘hole’ he’d put his finger in before, then again that was a girl. But the concept was seeming to be the same- or similar. After a little bit, and affirmation from Kieran, Jack slipped a second finger in. “Too soon?” He worried aloud.
It had been a long time since he had done this but he adjusted the feeling of it quickly. A low moan came from Kieran’s mouth and he shook his head at Jacks second question. “Curl yer fingers up a bit, ye will feel a soft spot, aim for it.” Not that he wasn’t doing the trick just like this but guidance was what Jack needed and Kieran was willing to give it to him. He hadn’t truly been with someone who hadn’t done it before but the thrill of it was exciting.
He leaned forward again to press his lips to Jacks, deepening the kiss as he worked his fingers inside of him. He hadn’t expected this to happen tonight but it made sense that they were still in a sort of honeymoon stage.
Jack followed the instructions get something he’d always been good at. Just like when he learned how to manipulate magic, he manipulated Kieran, following the cues given.
He welcomed the kiss, passionate and deep as it was a turn on. His fingers curled and massaged the other man as he felt himself slowly start to stiffen. Even with as much as he was feeling the passion and desire, it would still take him about a minute before his body would get to where a normal man was in seconds. Jack just hoped Kieran would never think it had to do with any hesitation about him. If anything, the reason he could get and stay hard at all said how much he was attracted to the other man and wanted him.
Kieran was a Doctor, he understood how the body worked, how Jack body worked and so he never thought he wasn’t doing good things to him. Jack was doing well, it was evident in Kieran’s own erection pressed up against his lovers hips. He moaned into his mouth, his hips pushing back up against him.
He leaned back again, panting and with lidded eyes looked back at Jack and whispered “Three.”
“Are you… su-” He started, but stopped and did as he was told when he felt Kieran up against him. Three fingers, part of him tried to imagine himself what it must feel like, clearly it was good- based on Kieran’s reaction. Jack’s other hand reached between them, down his underwear. His body almost ached for pleasure and closeness to his partner.
Seeing Jacks hand move he snatched it away and pulled his other hand from behind him. He was ready now and Jack was clearly ready as well. “Sit up.” He said breathlessly as he pulled his pants off and threw them toward the door. Once Jack had sat up he climbed on top of him and looked down at him. His eyes had so much want and his cheeks were flushed. It was truly a sight to behold.
Leaning in to press a heated kiss to his lips he leaned back only enough that their foreheads touched. “Trust me on this, alright?” He pulled Jacks underwear down and returned to his lips again. Grabbing ahold of the other man’s erection, he lined it up with himself and slowly sunk down onto it. He knew how intense the feeling could be at first and he needed time to adjust to his size as well.
His eyes widened slightly as his whole body shivered slightly and his breath gasped in his chest. “Oh-” Jack moaned softly. For a moment his breath panted, it took him a moment to realize and calm down. “You’re so…” He gasped, “tight.” His heart threatened to pound out of his chest as he joined lips with Kieran once again, trying to center the flood of feeling and emotions.
Jack’s hands rested at Kieran’s hips and he could feel the urges and impulses to move his own, press into the other man- but they hit that wall of unresponsiveness. “God Damnit.” He closed his eyes a moment.
Kieran framed Jacks face with his hands when he heard the expletives, especially one that was about God. “Hey, don’t worry about it.” He finally bottomed out on Jack and with a contented moan he leaned into his lips again. “Yer doing fine, let me do the work.” He didn’t like hearing Jack become frustrated with himself over things he had no control over.
He knew the way Jack felt about his chair and his condition. It had been a complex he hadn’t shook from over the years. But with Kieran, Kieran did see a chair, he didn’t see a broken man, he saw someone magnificent and perhaps someday he’d tell him. Slowly he lifted his hips, and came back down, a pace was set but it was still slow and languid so they could both adjust. With Jack he knew it would take longer and he only hoped he could hold off until Jack was ready.
A moan escaped him as the other man started to move. He tried to zone in on the feelings, the sensations. It was like being touched through a thick curtain. Those intense stimulations could be felt where small touches just blended into the curtain, but it was still through a curtain so it masked them. Jack tried to push through the curtain to feel the actual intensity of what Kieran was doing to him. Still, through the fog… but it felt real good.
It could be ironic that for a time magi, he couldn’t remember how much passed between when Kieran started and when everything finally peaked. “I think I’m…” He swallowed, feeling the intensity that built between the moans and kisses, groans, grunts and whispers of encouragement.
As the moment reached climax, he felt Kieran tighten around him slightly and a look in his eyes told him he was there as well. It was almost like an out of body experience for him. A split second, but he felt himself regarding the energies around them. A single thread was all he needed to pull on, a small spell cast without an utterance, just a burst of will. And time froze. They froze, slowed, in that moment of pure ecstasy. Each millisecond passing at a rate ten times slower than normal. Where what should have been a seconds long moment of pleasure stretched to five minutes. Then, once the end was reached, it all snapped back as if it never happened, well… save for the memory of it and the total exhaustion he felt.
After it was over, Kieran remained on Jack, eyes closed for a moment before he opened them to see the man before him. He’d never felt anything like that in his life and for the first time in his life, Kieran was speechless. “Ye...ye….” words eluded him and instead a burst of laughter came out. He wrapped his arms tightly around Jacks shoulder and kissed him long and hard. “Yer amazing.” He said as he pulled back to see how he was doing himself.
This was a big deal for Jack and even though Kieran enjoyed it, he had to make sure Jack felt the same way. “How are ye?” He finally asked, climbing off of Jack so that he could be more comfortable.
He was speechless himself, breathless and fell back to the bed. He didn’t realize tears had formed in his eyes as he felt overwhelmed, exhausted and still buzzed with euphoria. “G-ood.” Jack nodded, trying to steady his breath. “I-i din mean ta… do… that.” He laughed a little, looking up to Kieran. “Not sure I can move now.” He laughed a bit more.
Kieran found himself laying down beside him, his post coital afterglow still coursing through his veins. He laughed at Jack’s joke and brought his hand up to play with the hair on the side of Jack’s head. “Well whatever ye did, I didn’t mind it.” He offered with a full smile. Maybe this wasn’t what could be called a step in the right direction but it felt good to be around Jack, almost like a drug.
“Ye should give yerself more credit, I’ve seen ye do amazing things. That’s worth something in my book.” His blue eyes focused on Jack’s face, the flush that hadn’t left his cheeks, the shy look he gave Kieran. He was so appealing and he didn’t know why anyone else wouldn’t think the same.