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I need a drink or to shoot something repeatedly with exploding arrows

I just. I can't. This place wasn't supposed to take Jaybird.

So, I was channel surfing and saw a trailer for a new show and SARA was on it. SARA LANCE IS ALIVE. I don't know how it happens and I know I should care but I don't. SARA is ALIVE.

Also, she's going to be on a team with Barry's archnemesis boyfriend. That's a little odd but desperate times and all that I guess.

Okay. Time for a few announcements won't actually matter to anyone except my family probably. But I don't care. I feel like making announcements.

1) Given I'm beyond confused about my age at this point, with all the being here and then going back to that same point in my personal timeline back home right before I get dead by explosion, I am just going to declare that I'm the same age as May, whatever that is at this point. May, how old are you again? I can never keep track. It's only fair, since we're twins. Besides, it's not like my age ever made sense anyway, what with all the symbiote hybrid clone stuff.

2) I'm changing my codename. Because reasons. Namely...

A - Mayhem sounds like a supervillain name. Which...to be fair...
B - It also sounds like a terrible pun on May's name. Which...to be fair...
C - No codenames you pick at 16 are good codenames...
D - My whole family gets spider codenames, so...

Anyway, I'm going to go with Scarlet Spider, because sorta-maybe-clones have AWESOME luck with that one.

3) I'm starving. Who wants pizza?

4) I also kind of want to punch someone in the face. Any takers?

This whole post and its...everything is probably why I have like...two and a half friends.

Hey it was my birthday Sunday. Weird. Cake? Someone else should get one for me.

I'm up for laser tag, since I need stuff to do. Which is about to become pretty obvious. Oliver? Felicity, Barry, Jason, Other Roy? You guys want to school people?

Yeah, so stuff I've been doing when I wasn't working or overthinking. Finished a scarf? Francis, how's the crochet going?

( Crappy Pictures )

I'm like someone's grandmother or something. I still shoot things too, just for the record.

In honor of his most triumphant return from our not so sunny and rarely fun filled home of Starling City, I present Roy Harper and I lip syncing Kelly Clarkson.

This one is for you Scarecrow.

https://youtu.be/v-36GkJh6T0

Okay. Well home's still home, if anyone's wondering. Always a mess.

But this place is still real at least. Everyone still around?

Did I miss anything? It doesn't look like it was that long here.

[Filtered to Flash crew + Arrow crew (because why not) + Dinah + Spooky Jr]

So. This is more of a heads up for the West family and Barry Allen but I included the rest of you because he may know versions of you back home and he talks a lot.

So we had a new arrival recently. The redhead? His name is Wally West. In my world he's Barry's sidekick, Iris' nephew, and a speedster. So far things seem pretty similar between my world and his.

My Dinah's already volunteered to keep an eye on him so you don't have to worry about fitting someone you don't know into your lives. Whether you talk to him or not is up to you. I'll let her have this alternate world conversation with him so he'll be aware of you all but know not to push anything.

This is my one adult act for the year. And it's killing me.

[Unfiltered. Added later.]

And acting like an adult really has killed me. Someone come help me make terrible life choices.

So...Tommy? It's Tommy, right? You talked about racing a while back and I think I'm really up for that. Because I'm bored and I have way too much energy and I need something to focus on other than how I'm the worst at everything, and you're the only other speedster I've ever met who doesn't want to murder me in the face You still want to? If you're not too busy writing lesbian dinosaur porn

westallen.

Wanna come cheer me on if he says yes?

And maybe go out again after?

eddie.

How are you settling in?

We should hang out sometime. I'm really glad you're here. And we're friends. I mean...I think we're friends. We're friends, right? But we should definitely hang out.

joe.

How do I...anything really?

roy.

I have way too much energy and it's driving me crazy. Want to spar sometime?

ollie.

Hi. Are you still an asshole who doesn't remember me? Asking for a friend

felicity.

Hey. How are you doing? How's your not-Victorian detective boyfriend?

So... this is new. Not really what I imagined would happened but it's not so bad. I'm whelmed.

Uncle Barry? Artemis?

Got lost at the craft youtubes. Sorry Roy, you're on your own for knitting. I found a more interesting craft...Steph I'm afraid that means you're going to be now be the recipient of too many fucking bracelets.

Okay, anyone with a thing for crafts who knits, hit me with links to stuff about learning to knit. I've got youtube tutorials, needles, and yarn, and that's about it.

Everyone who knows me and is laughing, get it over with now.

I don't get how shooting deadly sharp objects at things is easier than using not-that-deadly things to knit.

So now that school's letting out and I won't have a million activities going on anymore I need to find something to do with my time.

I'm about do something stupid I just ordered a ridiculous amount of Chinese food for one person.

FILTERED TO HER EMPLOYEES AND FRIENDS
The office is going to be closed for the rest of the night. I'm not sure if anyone was scheduled/planning on dropping by. Just letting you know you have the night off.

When school lets out I think I'm going to spend most of my summer at the shooting range. Gotta make sure I don't get all rusty. Plus Frank Castle seems pretty cool

Magic portals. Sweet Christmas.

Jess? Danny? The fairy nun told me you both were here.

You know, I get that it sucks to have the big tentpole blockbuster movie flash your life up for everyone.

But I'm having a hard time feeling that sorry for the movie people when us TV people basically get our lives screwed up every week. So, sorry movie folk. It sucks for you too, but TV people, here's to weekly torture fests. Literally, in a few cases here and there.

How often do comics come out? Like monthly, right? I guess your level of fucked up is closer to us, so Jason and other Roy and all, you get included too.

I need a job.

Or I guess I could go to school.

I don't know. It's been a long time since I had no idea what to do next.

Bucky, buy me a puppy.

Time for the latest installment of "Sara Instagrams Too Much When She Can't Go Around Being a Ninja Assassin".

( pics! )

The club is doing well at least. With Thea's business sense and my bartender skills, I think we're really getting it going. I'm sort of settling into things here. I mean, I don't really have another option, considering I die back home. But it's something.

I have to say, I've had some pretty weird days, but this is a whole different level of weird.

You'd think I'd be used to getting thrown headlong into new situations, but mostly I'm just tired of it. I could use a break from the whole 'life getting shaken up' thing. I'm just not sure Pleasantville is the place for it. The League is going to be pissed.

[Filtered to Roy Harpers & Jason Todd]
All right. Kind of coming around on your "Oliver is an asshole" bandwagon. Guy showed up and doesn't even remember my name barely.

This place is screwed up.
[/Filter]

[Filtered to Thea, Felicity, and Barry]
So Oliver's got like years of crap to catch up on. Should we even tell him, or just hand him a remote control, episodes of our shitty shows, and then wait six weeks or so for him to finish prowling rooftops shooting at things before he talks about it, or what?

We should do something. The people of us who actually remember each other, anyway. Dinner or something?

Stranded unexpectedly. Well this is oddly familiar. At least it's not...

At least it wasn't a result of shipwreck so I'll take the small favors.

So. Where exactly have I found myself this time?

I would kill for a cigarette.

Please tell me there is a reasonable explanation for this that doesn't involve magic portals and fairies.

( spoilers for tonight's episode of the flash )

What the hell?

If there's singing animal sidekicks, I don't care what's in the way, I'm out of here.