Malcolm. AKA THE MONARCH (i_amyourking) wrote in we_coexist, @ 2008-07-16 18:15:00 |
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Entry tags: | the monarch, zz:status complete |
The last thing Malcolm--otherwise known as The Mighty Monarch--remembered was falling asleep next to his pookums. People were seriously not kidding when they talked about how awesome newlywed sex was. And now that they were living apart from the henchmen, they didn't have to worry about anyone knocking on the door in the middle of the night wanting the keys to the kitchen for a glass of milk, or for him to check their dormitories for tarantulas. They'd never been the same since the little buggers had hidden themselves in the air ducts during a trip to the Amazon the year before.
One of the many reasons he could never figure out why on Earth anyone would question Dr. Girlfriend...Wife...whatever...on her femininity was that luscious body of hers. He fell asleep after watching her in the dimness for a long time, and her sensuous, curvy frame was the last thing he laid eyes on.
Before waking up in a city park. In the nude. Covered in nothing more than a bedsheet.
It took almost a full minute for him to wake up completely and realize that he was laying on hard earth. It was still early in the morning, the sun just peeking above the horizon, so there was almost no one in the park.
He stood up, clutching at the blanket with all the decorum of a thirteen year old girl. "WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS GOING ON!?" he shrieked, his high-pitched squeal at full-volume. Not exactly subtle. He looked around, squinting through the trees, sure he'd see the Cocoon parked in the sky...somewhere...
Venture! This had to be Venture's fault. He started to shake with anger, and railed at the trees like they were responsible. "HOW DARE YOU!? HOW DARE YOU...THROW ME OUT OF MY FREAKING HOUSE AND..." Oh God. He had probably ravished her. "SO NOT COOL!" He screamed.
He looked for all the world like a crazed bum. His bright red hair was totally askew, (from sex, he'd be proud to tell anyone who asked) and his paranoid ramblings at the trees didn't exactly lend him an air of sanity. Nor the purple silk bed sheet he was clinging to for dear life.
Oh, yes. This was definitely a bad start to his day.