Laurel Lance (i_crylikeabird) wrote in we_coexist, @ 2011-03-03 06:53:00 |
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Entry tags: | dinah lance, jake chambers |
Surprises run in the family (Dinah & Jake log)
To say things had been 'chaotic' over the last few days was more of an understatement than Jake was willing to admit. As far as he knew, he'd slept through about five years. Five years, just gone. Waking up to find Barbara gone was bad, painful to his heart. She had understood things, had understood him in a way that Jake had been sure no one but his ka-tet would have.
He didn't know Dinah enough to know if she would be the same, and that worried him. Especially now, especially when he was coming home from school. She would understand if he explained his lateness, Jake knew. The streets of the City always winded, warped, changed at their own whim.
But the blood on his clothes, the saturated sleeve and the blood-smeared plates that he had tried to clean off, caked now with the dirt he had used for that purpose... would she understand that? And his reasons?
Jake hoped she would. And he hoped she would know something to do with the belts he'd taken and stuffed into his satchel. They were evil things, corrupted things, and Jake knew they couldn't be left there for anyone to take. Something in him had told him to take them home, to bring them to Dinah, and he had obeyed that intuition.
“Dinah?” he called once the door was shut behind him. His first impulse was to get to the bathroom, to clean off himself and Oy, and that was where his footsteps were taking them. “Dinah, are you home?”
Dinah was still getting used to being responsible for a 12 year old. There was the strong pang of worry whenever he was even a few minutes late. She knew that the City made it difficult to get places. That didn't matter. What mattered was that she couldn't help but worry about Jake when he was late. She knew what was out in the streets, and the idea of letting him see himself to and from school made her uncomfortable to say the least.
The sound of the door opening and Jake's voice interrupted her nervous pacing. Dinah rushed to meet him. Her face fell as she took in the sight of the blood-stained shirt, and the plates-those strange plates that she hadn't quite figured out how to ask him about yet. Her feet barely touched the floor as she crossed the room in quick strides.
"Jake, are you hurt? What happened?" Dinah's eyes searched him for any sign of injuries requiring immediate attention.
"I'm not hurt, but Oy is," Jake said, his voice sounding slightly rattled over concern for his friend. A lot of the blood had been wiped away from Oy's flanks, and some mud was caked on there to stop up the wounds. There had been little else to use as a paste, and no bandage was going to stay on his hindquarters like that, so Jake had used what was available - the dirt, and Oy's own blood - in order to patch up the wounds as best he could. He dared not use the blood of the wolf-people, having seen The Wolf Man in New York one fine summer at a film matinee, and knowing something about the supernatural effects of a wolf's bite or blood. He'd also done his best to keep the blood out of Oy's mouth for that reason.
He got into the bathroom, plunked the billy-bumbler in the tub, and turned on the taps. Oy backed away from the flor of water, but didn't try to jump out of the tub. "Good boy," said Jake. "Just stay there. We gotta clean you up."
The billy bumbler sat down, but spoke. "Oy. Ay. Leen up."
Jake turned his head to talk to Dinah. "I've seen vampires here before, but today was the first time I met werewolves. Some kind of werewolves. I got stuck in some warehouses and things, and they attacked us."
"Werewolves?" Dinah repeated. She drew in a breath and followed Jake into the bathroom. From there, she pulled out the first aid kit that Barbara had always kept under the sink.
She stopped herself from taking over for Jake, knowing that it was best to let him clean up Oy, as he was Oy's master. Animals were tricky when it came to first aid. All the same, she took out a rag and pressed it to Jake's forehead as he worked, gently wiping away some of the blood.
"How did you get away? And who else was with you?" she asked, her brow furrowed with concern. If Jake was taking detours that ended up in warehouses with some unknown person and werewolves, well then she definitely had to know about it. And find a way to keep him from having to take those detours, even if it meant getting a car and driving him to school herself.
"I killed two. A man came and helped with the rest. He said his name was Snake." Jake was washing his own hands off first. When Dinah wiped off his forehead, he paused for a moment to let her, then stripped off his shirt, setting it aside and reaching back for the soap and the billy-bumbler. Oy squeezed his eyes shut, but allowed the boy to wash off the mud and blood caked onto his fur, even wash away the last of the blood on his muzzle. It was clear from his expression that he wasn't enjoying the process, but he was tolerating 'Ake' doing what was best for them.
"They turned into people once they were dead. Naked people, wearing fur belts. Four men and a woman. Never saw them before, but I took the belts away." He wrinkled his nose, remembering the feel of the things. "I don't like them. They're... tainted somehow."
“Killed... you killed two?” Dinah asked, trying to process the information. She gestured towards the blood covered plates. “With those? How... how did you learn to use those?”
Dinah glanced over at the belts. Something Harry had mentioned nagged at the back of her mind. Something about werewolves and fur belts. She made a mental note to ask him about them afterwards.
“I’m just glad you were able to protect yourself,” she said. While killing wasn’t something she usually condoned, if it was the only option for self-defense, then she was glad Jake had been able to take it. She would have to ask more questions about this Snake later, but just now there were more important things to learn about the boy who was her responsibility.
This time, when Jake turned to look at her, it was with hard, gunslinger eyes. The question of him killing was not an unusual one, nor was it one to be taken lightly. She had every right to ask, Jake knew, but that didn't counter the fact that he was tired of trying to explain.
"I'm a gunslinger," Jake answered. "We deal in lead. Dealt in lead." His voice and eyes softened, and he turned away, focusing his attention on his friend as he tried to explain. Not wanting to look for fear of Dinah's repulsion or rejection. "I know I'm away from that life now, but it's still what I am. It was born in me, and honed. I know weapons. I'm a damn good shot. And yeah, I've killed before. But only when I had to. When it was necessary."
The wounds had bled again as Jake had cleaned them, but now the blood had ceased. He shut off the water in the taps, just running his fingers through Oy's wet fur. He didn't want to look back at Dinah yet.
"Barbara kept my guns in a safe, up in the attic. I don't know if they're still there. But the plates came here with me."
That was not the answer she'd expected at all. He was twelve, and someone had trained him to use guns? It certainly wasn't the first time she'd known a child to be trained in the art of killing. A chill raced up Dinah's spine as she remembered the conditions in which Sin had been raised, remembered the life she'd taken her away from.
"I'm sorry, Jake," Dinah said softly. She mopped up some of the blood and grime on his arm as she did so. "Kids your age... you deserve an actual childhood. Not this life. I'm sorry that it was pushed upon you. And whatever you say, this is not all that you are."
The sadness that touched Jake's expression wasn't for the life he had been pulled away from. It was for the life he had been drawn into. The life with Roland and Eddie and Suzannah and Oy and Pere Callahan. The life with his family, his ka-tet, on their quest for the Dark Tower. "I didn't have much of that to start with," Jake said, his voice edging on bitterness. "My parents were crap. The only one who gave a damn was Mrs. Shaw, our housekeeper. And she was paid to be there.
"Then I met Roland." His voice broke slightly on the mention of the gunslinger's name. "He loved me. Better than anyone else. Even when he let me fall, he loved me. And he kept his promise. He never let me fall again. It was a hard world, but it was our world. I had everything I wanted. A family that loved me, that understood me."
When he finally turned back to look at her, tears were rolling down his cheeks. "It's not all I am, but it's the core of me. Don't tell me it shouldn't have happened, I beg. Please don't tell me that. I can't have that life back, I know, but it was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. I would have spent the rest of my life with Roland -- I did spend the rest of my life with him -- and we did so much, and I loved them so much, that you can't say it shouldn't have happened. It was ka, and even though ka brought me here, and took away Barbara, and took away my family, I'll always be grateful to ka for that life I had."
A few tears slid down Dinah's cheeks, her heart cleaving in two at the pain, the loss that Jake had suffered. She reached out to wipe at a few of his tears and smooth his hair back. She nodded slightly.
"I won't tell you it shouldn't have happened, Jake. It was a different world from mine. A different world from here. And I'm sorry it's gone. I'm sorry Barbara's gone too. I really am. But you still have a home here. You have someone who cares about you. I can't ever take their place, but I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere if I can help it."
Dinah wished she could promise more, wished she had more control over the City and its odd way of shuffling people in and out. She wished she could somehow give him back that lost sense of family, of purpose.
Jake let out a small sob and threw himself against her shoulder, wrapping his arms tightly around her. The affirmation that he still had a place was almost too much. It was hard to be alone, and she was telling him that he wouldn't be.
"Thankee-sai," he whispered against her shoulder. "Thankee big-big."
Dinah returned the hug, patting Jake's back. More tears rolled down her cheeks, but she did nothing to brush them away.
"Of course. Of course, Jake," she said, her voice cracking ever so slightly.
She held him for a few minutes in silence.
"I'm sure Barbara set up ground rules in regards to the weapons. Those still apply, of course. But you always have a home here. Don't forget that."
Jake nodded against her. "Guns stay locked up, unless there's an emergency. She let me keep the plates, and was teaching me how to use the boomer-- I mean, the Batarang." He drew back a little, smiling lightly. "It was a birthday present."
A voice came from the tub. "Ake! Leen!" Claws scraped at the ceramic floor, and then there was the rumbled sound of Oy shaking some of the moisture out of his fur. Jake laughed, and turned back to the tub. "Yes, Oy, you're clean now." He reached for one of the towels and let the bumbler jump out of the tub into it. He rubbed the towel against the bumbler, careful of the wounds, before telling Oy, "Now we just have to clean those cuts out. It's gonna sting a bit, Oy, but you gotta stay still. Okay?"
"Kay," the bumbler answered. Or echoed. But Jake knew he understood.
He looked at Dinah. "Can you clean them? I'll hold onto him. The mud was the only thing I could use to make it stop bleeding."
Dinah nodded her approval of Barbara's rules.
"Good. Those are good. And you have to promise that if you're in a situation where escape is an option, you'll take that option and run."
She had already retrieved the iodine and a clean cloth for Oy's wounds.
"I can clean him," Dinah consented and set about gently cleansing the dirt and grime and then disinfecting. She used as much care as she would with any human, moving through the process as quickly as she could without hurting Oy.
"I'm not as good at Barbara at the batarang, but I can continue your training with that, if you'd like. I can also train you in some other things too, so you have alternatives if you find yourself in any more life-threatening situations." She looked up at Jake for just a moment. "But I want to make one thing clear. I'm sure Barbara might have mentioned that the Robins weren't much older than you when they started. I think that was too young, and I think they suffered for it. So, I'm happy to train you so you have other options in certain situations, but I won't take you out to fight crime until you're at least old enough to vote."
She turned her attention back to Oy's wounds.
"Just so you know, I'm not saying that you did the wrong thing today. I think you did the best thing you could for your survival. If those werewolves were the way I think they were, then they are people who chose to become something that wasn't quite human and was very deadly. Human life is a precious thing and it's our responsibility to preserve it at all costs, but in this case, I don't believe you had any better option. But it's still important to draw that line and stay as far away from it as you can. I've seen people that... well, once you cross it once, it's easier to convince yourself that taking a life is 'necessary', even when sometimes there are other options available."
Jake took his time answering her promise. He thought about it carefully, before deciding that the wording of the promise gave him an acceptable amount of leeway in a given situation and nodded. "I promise." Roland had taught them much the same, that escape was the better option if it meant living to fight another day. But he also remembered that when the time came to die, it wasn't always going to be happy, but that he must die satisfied, knowing that his heart was at peace, and ka had been served. With those lessons in mind, Jake could make that promise.
Oy flinched a few times from the sting of the iodine, shutting his eyes with what could only be a grimace on that oddly pointed face, but he kept still for the most part, and licked Dinah's hand when it was close.
"I'd like to keep training," Jake said. "I've got the basics down - Roland said there was never a gunslinger born who didn't take to a new weapon with ease - but I still try to practice every day. It keeps the mind sharp." Muscle was important too, but secondary. Roland focused on their minds and their hearts, knowing that those were the true weapons. "Barbara wanted me to learn ways to fight that didn't involve killing, too. I'd like to learn, sai, hear me I beg. "I don't--" He stopped himself, before he could say he didn't like it. Because that would have been a lie. There was a thrill behind the fighting, even behind the shooting. The feeling of purpose, the sense of knowing that you were doing the very thing you had been made to do. It felt good to hold a gun, to let his eye aim, his mind shoot, his heart kill.
Jake was quiet for a moment, before starting again, to speak true, say thankee. "I don't want to kill unnecessarily. I think I know where that line is, but I don't... want to let it get blurry. I'm only twelve, and if I want this to be in my life --no. Since this is part of my life, then I want to be as responsible as I can be."
That felt right. Jake knew that by the end of his time in Roland's world, he was tetchy. Any loud or sudden noises would have him drawing a weapon, only seeing if the source had been a danger or not after he was in a position to shoot. Eddie and Suze had been the same; Eddie had gone so far as to consider himself unsafe in 'normal' life. There was no reason to get soft, but there were definite reasons, and ways, to harden himself in other areas.
Dinah nodded her approval of Jake's acceptance of her terms, of the maturity beyond his years that he was displaying. She wasn't going to talk down to him or treat him like a kid. She knew how well that generally worked in any case.
"We can start tomorrow, if you'd like. Once your homework is all done, that is."
She finished with Oy's wounds and looked him over once more before turning her attention back to Jake.
"Are you sure that you're not hurt anywhere?"
Jake nodded. "Nothing got close enough. I threw the first plate, but I only had the two, and I didn't want to throw away my last weapon. So I sliced at them instead." He wrinkled his nose a bit. "That's why I got so messy. But Oy jumped at one of them and bit it in the throat. It still could claw at him a little."
He nodded towards his satchel. "The belts are in there, but don't touch them. They're tainted. I could feel it. Your friend the wizard should know what to do with them." Dinah hadn't mentioned knowing a wizard, but Jake knew about it just the same. "Sick, nasty things. They trapped the wolf-spirit in them. They skinned the wolf while it was still alive. And the wolf's rage and hate makes using them addictive."
Jake was speaking, not really thinking. That's what usually happened when the Touch took over. He was busily rubbing Oy's fur, trying to dry him off the best he could without going near the shallow wounds.
Dinah began to unroll the bandages for Oy but froze as Jake spoke. She looked up at him, her mouth dropping slightly open.
"I... didn't mention Harry to you, did I?" she said slowly. Then again, that wasn't the most worrisome statement. "How... how do you know what they did to the wolves?" she asked.
Jake's tone had left no doubt that he wasn't just guessing. No doubt whatsoever that he somehow knew what they'd done. Somehow knew about Harry.
Jake glanced up at her. "You didn't?" He was quiet for a moment, replaying what his mouth had said while he was occupied with Oy. "Oh. I guess you didn't." Damn.
Despite the worry in his eyes, a smirk appeared at the corner of his lips. "Probably not the kind of talk you expected when I got home, huh?" The smirk faded, and Jake drew in a breath. "Roland called it the Touch. I can... get a sense of things. Hear and send thoughts, if I make the effort. I don't, though. Not unless I have to. The rest of the time... I just... kinda know things. Like your friend the wizard. Harry? He's seen belts like those before, but he didn't know how they were made. And I know you trust him, and he trusts you. You... kind of Touched each other before, and it left a mark."
His expression took on a distinct grimace when he switched topics. "When I touched the belts, I could feel the animal in them. And I knew what had happened."
He wasn't wrong about Harry, or about how the soulgaze had left a mark. Dinah considered Jake for a minute.
"These things that you... pick up on? Do they leave a mark too?" She hoped not. She sincerely hoped that the impressions he might get from people's thoughts wouldn't stay fresh in his mind like the soulgaze she'd shared with Harry. He was too young to have to carry the burden of the darker thoughts some might have. Then again, she reflected, he was too young to carry most of the burdens that had been forced on him.
She smiled slightly.
"As for the kind of talk I was expecting to have when you get home... well, let's just say I was about your age when my Mother came home to shattered glass all over the living room, due to my Canary cry. So surprising gifts kind of run in the family I think." At this point, there was no question that Jake was her family, even if it wasn't by blood.
Jake shook his head after a moment of consideration. "No, it stays or it fades like a normal memory. Sometimes a little faster. Roland asked me to keep tabs on Suze once, when we were worried about her, but I only did it because he asked me as dihn. I don't like poking around in other people's heads. Once I switched places with Oy, but that was an emergency, and he agreed to it."
Her comment on her own power made Jake smile, a genuine smile that bordered on laughter, and it lit up his face, making him look like a boy again. And, with boyish embarrassment, he asked, "Can I hang out with Snake again? If you meet him? He seems... kind of alone, and he's a lot like... well, not like Roland, but still a gunslinger. He's a good guy, and I don't think people give him much of a chance."
Jake's full smile was infectious. Dinah returned it. It was so strange to be talking to him and have those moments where she forgot his age. And then that smile, the way it lit up her face, suddenly it was so obvious again that he was still a twelve year old. It gave her hope to find that glimmer of a reminder of his youth, however fleeting.
"Well, I would like to meet him first. Perhaps we could invite him out for burgers or pizza?" She wasn't sure about the fact that he was a gunslinger, but she had to keep reminding herself that people came from all different realities in this City, and there were some that came from places where it was quite literally a 'kill or be killed' world. To that end, it was hard to judge someone without having met them. And no one should have to be alone in this City.
His grin still in place, Jake nodded. "Thankee big-big, ka-mia," he said. "That'll do me fine, just fine."
"Ankee!" Oy seemed pleased as well, wagging his tail while alternately licking Jake's chin and Dinah's hands. The bandages were in place, and Oy had behaved himself through the whole process. Jake hugged the bumbler to his chest and nodded towards the satchel. "I've got some history and math homework that I should get started on. I still don't get how they can give history lessons in a place where so many different worlds are come together, but they won't change it just because I say so. Most of the kids are City-born."
The belts were still inside. Jake picked up the towel, setting Oy down, and wrapped it around his hands. "I wouldn't touch them with your bare skin," he warned. "It's not pleasant."
Dinah didn't remark on the history lessons. A part of her wondered how much of the history of this place could be true. With how artificial everything else was in the City, she had a hard time believing that it had been around long enough to have built a long history. But it wasn't going to help Jake's homework for her to voice her own concerns.
She accepted the towel gingerly, a slight chill rushing over her. Perhaps it was just knowing what was in the towel, but the urgency to get those belts taken care of as quickly as possibly pressed upon her.
"I won't. And if you're all right, I think I'll call Harry about these right away. The sooner they're disposed of, the better. But if you need me to stick around for awhile, I'm sure it can wait at least a little bit."
Jake shook his head. "I'm fine. Call the wizard. I'd rather not have these in the tower when I go to sleep." He transferred the belts from his satchel to the towel Dinah was holding, careful not to touch them himself. He gave her one more smile. "Thanks, Dinah. For believing me."
Dinah wrapped the belts carefully and nodded.
"You're welcome, Jake," she said warmly. "Thank you for confiding in me."