"Any man who has the guts to sell his soul for love has the power to change the world" -- From Ghost Rider
My entire upbringing was without really saying it outright, a method of reminding me that there was nothing I could do about the way things were, they simply were. Questioning the way of things, was not something ever conceivable. I knew very little about how to be when I was still a child, only that I had
better be good, or the King will get angry and it will be your fault. I heard the same in Menegroth, where I was sent and raised like any other Sindarin elf of the Doriathrim. There were others my age, sent to live in the Deep Caves. They were friends, but they are I think not around anymore. The world was harsh and dim, they would be happier in Aman so I only hope they are now there in peace.
I think part of me broke, to realize that the one place I had known kindness in had been destroyed. Nargothrond had been my first home, I think. I remember so little anymore. My uncle was everything to me. Learning of his death, all I could think about for days was that I would never see him smile again, or listen to him on his harp, as he would teach me. I must have had a hard case of hero-worship. I wish I could feel more certain about my memories. I don't believe one person can change the world, because I was raised not to believe something like that.
The last Númenórean king sold his integrity, everything that made him an honorable man, for the love of life, of power. That I think is not actual love, but petty crude reflected light from real love. Yet he did change the shape of the world in his own way.
That willingness to give up everything for love, perhaps what is meant is that a similar strength is needed for the ability to shape the world by your own hands. That same ruthlessness and willingness to do such terrible things to ones own self.
Christian mythology seems to involve the concept of selling ones soul, as if one could actually do such a thing, and fall into a place called Hell. I do not believe in hell. I do not believe that one can sell their soul, but I have seen countless times both men and elves do terrible things for love, or for what they think is love. The strength of will, to give up all honor and integrity, to do evil deeds because of love, a love for another or an object or an idea, that is a powerful strength for either good or evil, but when does it lose sight of anything but the darkness? If one is given the hard choice, perhaps by then they have reached the potential for changing the world by their deeds.
muse: Haldir
words: 560
fandom: silm/lotr