I Resist the Muses

Character: Celena Ducayne
Fandom: Decay of Dreams; Original Character
Word Count: 165
open for roleplay or comments here

What have you done that you wish you could apologize for?

Everything.

The whole thing, from the day my brothers and father and I swore that terrible oath, until the day I died, 500 years later, at the end of the First Age.

When my father took up a brand against the ships at Losgar and burned them, I alone stood back, realising the error of what we were doing. He looked at me that day with hate in his eyes, and said to me "If you do not stand with me, you stand with him." (meaning Morgoth). I was afraid then, afraid that he was right. Afraid of what would happen if I broke my oath and did not follow through until the bitter end.

And so I killed. My sword dripped red with the blood of other elves, and I could not stop or turn back because I dared not break the oath. Even after my father was killed I could not escape the grip of his control over me. I and my brothers were condemned as Kinslayers, and rightly so.

But what use an apology? It does not bring back those I murdered. It does not put right the wrongs I committed. I cannot apologise. All I can do is grieve.

Character: Maedhros
Fandom: The Silmarillion

It's almost spring. How does the weather or change in seasons affect your mood?

Spring was always my favourite season of the year, although spring would come late to Himring, it being in the north of Beleriand. Some years the snow would lie thick until April, and when it was gone it was like being released from prison - to look out one morning over the plains below the mountains and find the white replaced by green and gold.

Of course the melting of the snow meant only one thing to me: the mountain passes between Hithlum and Himring would be clear, and that would mean a visit from Findekano. It would take a rider twelve days to make the journey, though Kano always claimed he could do it in nine, I was never quite sure that I believed him. By the time he arrived it would usually be early May, and he would stay the whole summer, until the early snows of October warned him that he would need to leave if he were to get back before the passes were blocked once more.

Decades after Findekano's death, my brothr Macalaure and I fostered two elflings, Elrond and Elros, who grew to be wise and well-known. When they were very small, they celebrated their birthdays year after year, and they could not understand that Macalaure and I had no birthdays, because we were born before time was measured by sun and moon. The children insisted that we picked birthdays anyway, so they could celebrate ours too, and I picked a day in early May, because thinking about Kano's arrival at that time of year always gave me cause to celebrate.

And so spring is always my favourite time of year, when the last of the snow is gone, the trees once again bear leaf and blossom, and flowers paint the meadows in colour. It's a time for hope, and happy memories.

Character: Maedhros
Fandom: The Silmarillion

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". Do you agree with this statement? Why or why not?