Elena Gilbert (deardiary) wrote in valloic, @ 2020-11-13 13:03:00 |
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Elena was having a lazy morning so far. She didn't need to be in to work until later in the day, so she was allowing herself to drift in and out of sleep. Though she usually liked to consider herself an early riser, sometimes, it was nice to just be lazy and not really do anything. She'd get up and take a shower in awhile, when she finally felt ready to rise from her warm, comfy, inviting bed. Elena turned, snuggling into the sheets, getting ready to drift off for a little while again.
But something stopped her. Because suddenly, she wasn't alone in the bed anymore. In fact, there was a very familiar person lying next to her, lazily propped against a pillow, giving her a wicked grin that she was all too familiar with. A grin that usually gave her heart butterflies and made her go weak in the knees a little bit. Except this time, it just gave her an uneasy feeling in her stomach.
"Damon?"
And that grin that usually made Elena melt grew wider. "Hey, Elena."
Elena shook her head. "This...this isn't happening. I can't be seeing you. Not here. Not like this. It isn't fair."
Damon scrunched his brow at her. "You're not happy to see me?"
Elena sighed, sitting up in bed, rubbing her temples. "Of course I'm happy to see you, Damon. I love you. And I miss you. But...you died. I need to make my peace with that."
Damon reached for her, but for some reason, his hand couldn't touch her cheek. Elena was somewhat glad for it. "Can't we just enjoy the time we have together, here? I miss you, Elena. I'm trying so hard to find my way back to you."
Elena gave him a weak smile. "I know you are," she said. "But here, in this place, you can't find your way to me. Not by choice. If you show up here, I'd be overjoyed. But I can't wait for you, especially since I don't know how long I'll be here. I'll always love you, Damon, but I can't just sit around, hoping that someday, you'll just show up here. Especially since there's no way of telling if I'll ever actually see you here. We have no control on who shows up here."
Damon frowned at her, looking like he was going to say something, but Elena cut him off. She wasn't going to argue with a ghost.
"I need to move on. I know that's going to be difficult for me, but I owe to both of us to try. I know that you'd want me to be happy. As selfish as even you can be, I know you wouldn't want me wasting my life for something that might never happen again for us." Elena leaned forward, wishing that she could at least touch his face one last time. "I am forever thankful for the time that we had together. It was some of the best time of my life. I'll always look back on it fondly. I love you, Damon, and part of me always will. But if I'm going to be happy and enjoy my life here, I need to move on."
Damon gave Elena a wistful look, leaning closer to her, but once again, they did not touch. "I love you, Elena Gilbert."
Elena gave him a sad smile. "Goodbye, Damon."
As he faded from her view, Elena wiped away a tear. There was a hollow feeling in her heart, but it didn't hurt as much as she thought it would.