Feb. 4th, 2019 at 12:09 PM
[Blocked from Thor]
I had one of those not-dreams last night. There was a time when I actually wished they would happen. I felt left out. And then... I don't know what changed. I began to dread them. Maybe because so many of them sounded so unpleasant, and the pessimist in me expected that unpleasantness would inevitably find me, as well. I hate that I was right, and even still, it was more upsetting than I could possibly imagine.
Why am I writing about it here? Because it's what everyone else does? Because I need a cathartic experience? It's like a wet, icy blanket that I cannot shake off.
( cut for potential trigger: child endangerment )
I had one of those not-dreams last night. There was a time when I actually wished they would happen. I felt left out. And then... I don't know what changed. I began to dread them. Maybe because so many of them sounded so unpleasant, and the pessimist in me expected that unpleasantness would inevitably find me, as well. I hate that I was right, and even still, it was more upsetting than I could possibly imagine.
Why am I writing about it here? Because it's what everyone else does? Because I need a cathartic experience? It's like a wet, icy blanket that I cannot shake off.
( cut for potential trigger: child endangerment )