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Posts Tagged: 'lin+beifong'

Nov. 1st, 2012


[info]nightwinging_it
[info]valarnet

[info]nightwinging_it
[info]valarnet

What the...


[info]nightwinging_it
[info]valarnet
I woke up with one of those Baby Think It Overs from the high school parenting classes screeching in my ear. It was wearing a little satiny prince costume complete with a spraypainted crown. I've also had emails from the interns with photos of the cubicle maze I constructed and me...posing in it, in one of the really really GOOD spinny chairs.

...

On the one hand, I got congratulated for having the balls to wear those pants for an entire weekend. On the other? I was JARETH THE GOBLIN KING. I figured out the school that the thing belongs to, ran the baby over there at lunch, after I'd jammed it in a cooler in my trunk so it would shut the ever loving fuck UP, and turned it in to the teacher there. Who decided, since we were there and all, to show me the software and what it said about my parenting skills.

...Apparently I'd been taking excellent care of it until the cooler/trunk incident, which would have gotten me reported to CPS, and would have made me fail the project.

...Clearly I'm not ready for children... But Jareth the Goblin King is parenting material?

...Who fucking knew?

Oct. 28th, 2012


[info]nightwinging_it
[info]valarnet

[info]nightwinging_it
[info]valarnet

The clock is ticking...


[info]nightwinging_it
[info]valarnet
Tick tock, Tick tock. Thirteen hours and this child is mine. Do you still want me to keep him, or would you like to play the game?

Oct. 18th, 2012


[info]acearcher
[info]valarnet

[info]acearcher
[info]valarnet

 


[info]acearcher
[info]valarnet
Discussion time, Valarnet!

When is it ever right/IS it ever right to take the law in your own hands? Even if the law is wrong/right? Cause honestly, it's pretty fucking screwed up right now, and this powerless to stop it thing has got me thinking.

Oct. 12th, 2012


[info]tin_miss
[info]valarnet

[info]tin_miss
[info]valarnet

 


[info]tin_miss
[info]valarnet
All our windows just exploded.

[info]exitthedonut
[info]valarnet

[info]exitthedonut
[info]valarnet

 


[info]exitthedonut
[info]valarnet
Well.

Safe to say the new boosters worked.

Oct. 6th, 2012


[info]korra
[info]valarnet

[info]korra
[info]valarnet

 


[info]korra
[info]valarnet
Today is so very not awesome.

Oct. 4th, 2012


[info]cyclopswasright
[info]valarnet

[info]cyclopswasright
[info]valarnet

 


[info]cyclopswasright
[info]valarnet
Anyone ever dream of someone they really want to kick the ass of?

Sep. 25th, 2012


[info]promise_me
[info]valarnet

[info]promise_me
[info]valarnet

 


[info]promise_me
[info]valarnet
Building a new life for yourself in a new place is no easy task, especially when you're not exactly an American citizen. I was able to buy a used car easily enough because I had the cash on hand, but getting an apartment is another thing entirely. I don't have a job because I want to re-open my flower shop here, but all of these fancy apartment complex places won't accept you if you don't have a job and I can't open up the flower shop until I can prove I'm an American citizen. I feel like I'm living in a big Catch-22 right now.

Sep. 24th, 2012


[info]unbendable
[info]valarnet

[info]unbendable
[info]valarnet

 


[info]unbendable
[info]valarnet
This network problem could have gotten me and my partner killed. I called for back up and instead of getting dispatch I got a strip club.

Do I even want to know what a "slippery nipple" is?

Sep. 15th, 2012


[info]korra
[info]valarnet

[info]korra
[info]valarnet

 


[info]korra
[info]valarnet
OKay, so, Uncle Iroh?

I know you're really busy at the Hospital right now, and that's why I've been pulling all these extra shifts. It's not that I mind doing that. It's that I accidentally might have caused a fire in your kitchen.

I have no idea how that happened.

It's under control now, but I'm pretty sure we're going to need repairs...

Sep. 6th, 2012


[info]korra
[info]valarnet

[info]korra
[info]valarnet

 


[info]korra
[info]valarnet
I cannot believe I got roped into going to this thing.

If I had one of those fancy phones, I'd hide in the corner and somehow get it to remotely play World of Warcraft.

Aug. 31st, 2012


[info]korra
[info]valarnet

[info]korra
[info]valarnet

 


[info]korra
[info]valarnet
Everyone's going to some stuffy, fancy dance this week. Even old Uncle Iroh sent his tux off to the cleaners. I didn't even know he had one of those, but hey, I only just met the guy a few weeks ago.

The last dance I went to? Some idiot spiked the punch, and my date drank too much of it, started dancing up on the stage to try and show off his moves to me, then jumped on the crowd like he was just going to crowd surf.

Crowd surf. At homecoming. Sure, guy. You're so awesome.

He got a concussion, of course. When he fell on the floor. And then puked on me on the way to the hospital. Yeah, we don't talk anymore. The week after that was seriously awkward.

Aug. 23rd, 2012


[info]quellsurvivor
[info]valarnet

[info]quellsurvivor
[info]valarnet

 


[info]quellsurvivor
[info]valarnet
Oi, I need a life if I'm posting on this thing twice in one week. I would like to point out I would have found someone covering my truck in yellow post-it notes amusing had they not all had political slogans on it. You could have at least picked the lesser of the annoying candidates. The bumper sticker was too much. I mean sure we all read them going down the road but who doesn't think the person driving the car is a moron for ruining their vehicle with that sticker? Do you even remember the last bumper stick you read? That thing BETTER come off my truck without touching the paint job.

Once I find out who you are, I am going to school you in how to pull a proper prank. It will be so good I will solicit the good people here on the net to help.