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Posts Tagged: 'feanor'

Apr. 14th, 2012


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

It's CATURDAY! :D


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet


If I saw any of my cats like this I'd be scared! What horrors would the ponies unleash upon me?! Rarity would make me comb my hair and then Fluttershy would stare at me, no one withstand staring of that magnitude!

Mar. 30th, 2012


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

[info]icanhazfeanor
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I need a person!


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet
YOU might be that person!

Do you like cats? Do you like Newport Beach?

More importantly, do you like MONEY?

Feanor is old and tired and hates driving his car. It's bad when he drives his car, he wishes his car was a horse, but his car doesn't listen when he talks, and the wheel doesn't work at all like he imagines reigns on a horse would. Also, you can't ride on top of a car, it just doesn't work like that. Feanor was sad when he learned that.

Maybe Feanor should design a car that works like a horse!

Maybe Feanor should stop talking about himself in the third person.

So... right! I need a person. This person would do things like buy my groceries for me, pick up dry cleaning and gyros and other things like this sort of thing. It's errand running, but you get to also stick around if you want, as long as you don't mind cats. The cats are staying and you have to deal with them.

It would be an extra plus if this person knew how to reheat gyros that are frozen, and knew how to play World of Warcraft, because sometimes I just really need someone to cut gems for me while I'm cutting gems in that other game.

The pay is good, because even Feanor knows that Feanor is hard to put up with.

Post here!

Mar. 27th, 2012


[info]imnosidekick
[info]valarnet

[info]imnosidekick
[info]valarnet

Bullshit Roy Can Do Without


[info]imnosidekick
[info]valarnet
For the record, everyone's allowed to add on to the list with your own Bullshit You Can Do Without. Participation is a fun thing here. Or some bullshit like that.

1. Motherfucking cat memes. look, Caterday was fun a couple years ago, when all you people were in High School. Time to grow up, get a clue, and leave the shit alone. Those of you who aren't in high school, maybe it's a thing in Italy, or recluse land, but fucking seriously, man. The cats are getting OLD.

2. Running out of vicodin and having to go through the drawn out stupid process of trying to get more. It's not like I pop more than about three a day, and I can go without it without having bad withdrawal, but holy shit, it hurts.

3. The Evil Bitch Therapist's idea of a massage. Where'd you learn that one, lady, Guantanamo? Combine that with the lack of pain meds and you start to get my message pretty clear I think.

4. Shoplifting bastards on my shift. Do you idiots really need a tongue ring badly enough that you have to run off with it when somebody opens the case? And who the fuck steals two bucks worth of hair dye and a living dead doll? Do people actually do shit with those things? How the fuck did you manage to walk out of the store with that while I was on my break? I know my co-workers are idiots and vampires who can't see in the light or some excuse but seriously, HOW?

5. Breaking bowstrings while I'm shooting. Breaking bowstrings that snap against my cheek while I'm shooting. Bitch motherfucking HURTS and now I've got a papercut all on my face. Yeah, that's attractive when you're starting a new job, now isn't it?

6. People calling me an angry bird. It was funny the first ten times, but now it's getting really old, and if I were an angry bird, I'd break your stupid glass houses right now.

7. Email spam from my former godfather's box. I'm not even touching that, but damn it gives me feels, as you people on tumblr say. And I don't do with feels that well.

So go ahead. What's pissing you people off today?

Mar. 25th, 2012


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

[info]icanhazfeanor
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Notice:


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet
To discourage complacency, all water dishes have been replaced with cat food dishes, and all cat food dishes have been replaced with water dishes.

Gyros have been replaced with hot pastrami sandwiches.

My Little Ponies have been replaced with Avatar: The Last Airbender (how do these people tell eachother to get bent? Would getting bent involve fire, water, earth, and air in interesting places?)

Beers have been replaced by fizzy pretentious water from France.

Proceed.


[info]wolfqueen
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[info]wolfqueen
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[info]wolfqueen
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Stupid!


Stupid

Stupid



STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!!!

Mar. 21st, 2012


[info]imnosidekick
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[info]imnosidekick
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Just for fun...


[info]imnosidekick
[info]valarnet
Since we're on the subject of polling, and sharing questions and bonding through it or whatever shit here, I've got a question for YOU, network. Say you get arrested for some stupid petty crime, like a brawl gone out of hand, or drunk and disorderly or whatever conduct people think means you're unsafe, who's the friend you'd call to bail you out? Who's the friend who'd actually be sitting in jail next to you and grinning?

In other general questions, is what I'm pretty sure constitutes a form of torture a decent motive or defense for murdering your sadistic bitch of a PT?

[info]warp_speed
[info]valarnet

[info]warp_speed
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I know I don't start posts much here...


[info]warp_speed
[info]valarnet
...but this had me laughing. And everyone needs a good laugh, now and again. You know, before one finds themselves lost out in the wilderness with a bear gnawing on their skull, like it's made out of butterscotch candies.

Fair warning: This is likely not work-safe, due to language. Like you couldn't tell just from glancing at it, straight away. So put on your snuggie, curl up with a cup of tea in the comfort of your own homes, and enjoy!

Vid under here! )

Hopefully it shows, or I've fouled up the interwebs, entirely.

Mar. 20th, 2012


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

 


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet
I had to drive today.

It's been at least a month and a half since the last time I did that! I had to take some time to remind myself of things like silly USA driving laws and what that one peddle does that isn't the gas and how to differentiate the R from the D.

Cars are hard, sometimes I wish we could all just ride horses. Horses are easy and don't need fuel aside from hay, which is like... pft, just go farm some, that would make all those hippies happy I think, no more plundering the earth's natural resources for making cars go places and things like that.

Anyway.

Red came home last night with two extra kittens. I don't know where he got them from but he stared at me for a long time with his longsuffering stare of 'I'm keeping these and you're going to say yes'. Unfortunately for him I'M the one with thumbs in this situation and also I'm smarter.

I already have 7 cats, I don't need 2 more! There's no room for them anyway, the other cats have already claimed all the rooms, and Midnight will cut me again if I take in more strays. I still have marks on my arm from the last time.

So I bundled them into my car, which was good, because Kano had begun herding them around - apparently it's just Amber and Russet he doesn't like - and he gave me these big big sad cat eyes, but I had to put my FOOT down.

Sometimes you have to do that. SO the kittens are at the shelter now. And I didn't even run anyone over on the way.

[info]thunderer_god
[info]valarnet

[info]thunderer_god
[info]valarnet

If I were a little pony...


[info]thunderer_god
[info]valarnet
Read more... )

Mar. 19th, 2012


[info]vulcan_mind
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[info]vulcan_mind
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[info]vulcan_mind
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As it seems the past few days have been dedicated to what can only be described as "hypothetical" questioning, I am now going to attempt to steer the community in a different direction. Polling.

How old is the average poster here? If you feel uncomfortable divulging your age, you may pick a range.

[info]split_ends
[info]valarnet

[info]split_ends
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I did an Essay on this subject, once.


[info]split_ends
[info]valarnet
Tens of thousands of years ago, Man hit Man with rock. He also hit Man with sharp stick, and then spears. Eventually Man figured how to throw rock, and throw stick. And then came the sling and bow, with which Man could throw rock and stick much harder, faster and farther. Man also sharpened rock, for stabbing.

This was how it was for millenia. Man would sometimes build devices for throwing much larger rocks and spears, and sharpened metal, but it was all the same principle. Then Man developed gunpowder. He put a rock in a tube and propelled the rock by a contained explosian. There was also the bomb, which was an exploding rock. Over the following centuries, Man refined this, making the rocks go faster and be deadlier, but it was still a rock shot from a tube.

Man turned the tube around, and put a rock at the end, and made missiles and rockets. Nuclear bombs are rocks being split at a sub-atomic level. Lasers are rocks focusing light. Online research shows me experimental weapons. A railgun propells a rock with magnets. An asteroid as a weapon is basically rock falls, everyone dies.

But in the end, it comes down to Man being unable to rise above his primal nature. Man hits Man with rock or stick, and one Man dies, and the cycle continues.

Mar. 18th, 2012


[info]thunderer_god
[info]valarnet

[info]thunderer_god
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Everyone else is


[info]thunderer_god
[info]valarnet
...If you have a friend who failed a test becase of stupid reasons, would you think he was really stupid?

IS the friend actully as stupid as everybody said when he was younger? Is it something else/ I mean if he knows everything that was on the test but it took too long to do and was hard and speling counted but he knew it is he still an idiot or something else?

What would you have your friend do to feel better?

[info]not_my_nose
[info]valarnet

[info]not_my_nose
[info]valarnet

...


[info]not_my_nose
[info]valarnet
I've got this friend from school who met a girl who he thinks is kind of awesome. But he's got a really shitty homelife and he doesn't really want her to know about it, or about what a loser he is right now. He's kind of decided not to say anything and just pretend it's all normal. Good idea? Bad idea? Just wondering.

[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

Cats!


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet
Specifically, mine!

I know you're all so sad I missed Caturday. Well this is ... Catursunday. Or something.

Here, have cats! I made a table or something, okay I stole the code from somewhere and fiddled with it forever and then I had to figure out how to make the pictures smaller. Well before that I had to figure out how to get the pictures from the picture stick into the computer but...

Anyway there's cats now, and you can get to know them!

Here's a link: Yes This Table Actually Exists

[info]parking_brake
[info]valarnet

[info]parking_brake
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Hypothetical Question


[info]parking_brake
[info]valarnet
Say you have a friend who's extremely well groomed.

He likes a lot of plants, keeps his place really clean, drives a hybrid car, and has fruit and yogurt in his fridge.

You're pretty much assuming that friend likes guys, aren't you?

I mean would you tell that guy, "I think you like guys", or would you just never say anything?

[info]the_wolverine
[info]valarnet

[info]the_wolverine
[info]valarnet

Guess its time to get into the 21st century.


[info]the_wolverine
[info]valarnet
So what's the fucking point of this thing, anyway? Can't you meet at a bar and talk face to face? No chance to self-edit.

Speaking of bars, why do the good fights always happen on the nights I'm not there? Varric, how many times have I told you to call me. Could have saved you on property damage.

Mar. 17th, 2012


[info]an_illusive_man
[info]valarnet

[info]an_illusive_man
[info]valarnet

Why is there Pony Porn in my feed?


[info]an_illusive_man
[info]valarnet
Today was a good day. My new man in Greece is acclimating nicely, and I didn't have to terminate anyone.

The recluse was spying on me again. I fail to see what's so interesting about a man drinking wine and smoking on his patio. That recluse who's letting his talents go to waste is far more interesting, in my book.

It would be interesting to forward his location to certain parties with a genetic interest, but that shall have to wait, Leverage is on.

Mar. 15th, 2012


[info]offinherhead
[info]valarnet

[info]offinherhead
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[info]offinherhead
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I let her touch me. Rather, I touched her hand. Its all very confusing. I didn't jump. I wanted it. I can't remember the last time I wanted to be close to someone. My sister I think. The last time I saw her smiling, reading to me while I was in her arms. My mother, while we were watching the telly that night. Before the door crashed open and hell came into my life.

It felt nice. I've been lonely. Its good to get out, talk to people.

At least living people.

[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet

I love this thing!


[info]icanhazfeanor
[info]valarnet
It's like this little box that I can just put all my thoughts in and people have to read them because this is the place where thoughts get put and then they get read.

... I suppose you don't actually have to read them, I only read half the things I find on the internet.

Anyway, the other day I was holding Finn up to the mirror and we both decided that I might just be old enough to keep this beard. I lost track of the time along the way but I guess I had a birthday a few months back. I really should have gotten some party hats for the cats and had some kind of party. That's what people do on their birthdays, right?

But back to what I was talking about, which is that Finn and I decided that the beard was good, and in the process of deciding I thought about how nice it could be to copy your face and then change it, then look at your changed face and your real face and decide which one was better.

Not that I need to decide to make the decision to keep the beard anymore, but someone out there might want to get on making a machine like that work so that next time I have to decide about my face I can look at my new face and go 'There! That's the face I want!'

Hey! I'm going to post these cats just knocked over something and they're all pretending they didn't do it which means they DID do it.