Network

I'm really sorry about before. You're not an arse. Well not as much of an arse.

Still an arse. Really, unleashing all that, are you daft? Pacts with Oberon? Don't you read? That never ends well!

Bugger all, I was wondering if I'd start dreaming. So I dream London was a war zone.

Green alien shapeshifters. Really? Really? Captain Britain on the other hand there are no words! He's amazing! That Black Knight bloke is just...guh

Three broken bones, a half-dozen abrasions and a sprained ankle. All because someone had the bright idea to introduce the kids to rugby.

I patched them up, of course. I think tomorrow I'll lecture them on the merits of Cricket.

The best part of being a disgruntled hermit, besides yelling at people to get off of my lawn is that I only have four people to shop for during the batshit crazy holiday rush.

So take that, you suckers with a million friends. Or something.

Ladies & Gentlemen, boys and girls and whatever you identify with, I have an announcement. Big, life changing announcement actually.

Well, not for you. I mean, your lives will basically be the same.

I, Tony Stark, will be marrying the hell out of Pepper Potts because I asked her and she said yes. And if any of you talk her out of it, I'll find where you live and blast metal outside your house while you try to bring home your date for the first time. You know the one, the hot architect or whatever.

But seriously. We're engaged.

I take a sabbatical for eight months and I miss out on a lot of fun.

My friend Geoff is a fucking idiot, and I'm going to quit talking to him.

My first match in the Buzzsaw League is tonight! I'm so nervous! But thanks to warp_speed and littlegreengirl I'm sure it will be fine.

You can tune in live on the internet, and I think there's a pay per view event for it, too! Faiza and her robot, Excalibur!

Oh, fantastic! This is very exciting. I really like meeting new people, but it can sometimes be difficult. Let's just say I'd rather not meet a single one of you at work.

My name is Jean. Hello!

My robot is done! My crashing, smashing robot of smashingness! Just in time for the judges to inspect her, too!

Oh I can't wait, I'm going to rent the lorry right this instant so I can bring my baby home. After a suitable demonstration.

I need something to smash with my robot.

If a girl shows up at a party that she knows will have lots of single men, in a skimpy dress, with sparkly green underwear on, in the hopes she gets to strip and show it off... does that make her a slut?

Does it make her more of a slut if she does, in fact, strip? What about if she kisses another girl for fun, or suggests a man sandwich and/or orgy?

Or does that just make her the girl at the party that you wish was always at your parties, because she's so much fun?

And if a girl likes changing sexual partners as often as she changes her underwear, does that make her a whore, or what?

The lines are a bit blurry in my friend's life today, so I'm just wondering.

This is entering into that mystical category of ariing other people's personal problems online because I've honestly got no idea what to do to help some of them out and I dunno, I appreciate a lot of perspectives to keep me fresh or whatever you want to call it, so...We'll go with that.

There's a friend of mine from the pre-med days, Geoff. We still keep in touch despite the fact he's out in fuck knows where, doing fuck knows what now, and anyway, that doesn't really matter. What matters is, he's establishing himself in a new town, meeting the people and digging himself out of a rut, and he's made a lot of amazing friends and likes being around them when he's not working.

But, the thing is, my friend, Geoff, has started to get the idea that some of his friends are kind of leading him places he's not really sure he wants to be going. Don't get me wrong, he thinks they're amazing, even if he doesn't get their obsession with ponies fucking, but he's just a little worried about, you know, participating in some of the antics. Since it can get everybody into more trouble, and all.

And, well, he's like me, he's a doctor and all, and older than the ringleader of the little antics, bless his heart, and isn't sure if he should be playing along because his job is kind of high stress, or if he ought to try controlling his friends or what.

And there's this amazing girl that my friend's met, and he's been getting the idea she wouldn't really approve of all of this....carousing that's going around and...

Anyway. My friend doesn't want to lose any of his friends, but he doesn't want to end up with them cut open on his ER table, or the side of a ditch either. Or to be there with them.

So, uh, what do I tell the guy?

Broadcasting this here so that I've got an audience who'll be witnesses since I've got the feeling it's all going south soon. James Whatever Your Middle Name Is Kirk, you had better to GOD be resting and taking care of yourself, and anybody tells me otherwise, I'm gonna hunt you down at Mad Dogs and come after you. Everybody else? If you make sure he's doing it, you'll have my thanks.

Something tells me that the kid needs watching, and I'm not about to let my work go and get ruined or give him an infection, specially when I'm not exactly used to extracting bullets that are keeping somebody alive.

After the midget bar fight, what in the hell did I just type, but swear on a stack of bibles that it's actually TRUE, we wound up somehow at Scotty's and the morning after getting drunk...best hangover of my LIFE, I've got to say. I won't post any more about that here just yet, but trust me, it was golden.

Work's in a couple hours, and it's gonna be a long shift. Why'm I suddenly just missing out on all the fun?

It is a strange practice writing on a network where I do not know most of the people. At least on Facebook, I know who is reading the words I throw into the ether. Most of those people are interested in what I have to say, understand my humor, and are teachers or students. Here, I am not entirely sure of the demographics that make up the user-base and that makes it unnerving. But I must soldier on. Or quickly delete my account, I suppose.

My name is Spock. I look forward to making your acquaintances.

Its been quite a busy day so far. I drew an early morning shift at the hospital. Had a boy come in missing an ear, the poor thing. It seemed to be some sort of animal attack. I'd rather have the weirder ones, than a child. But we got him fixed up and he's resting comfortably right now.

There's been the usual as well. Shootings, stabbings, a car accident, strange objects in the anus. I look forward to a nice slow day of people with head colds at the practice. I sometimes wonder if I take on too much. But I want to help at the hospital, and I like the pace of the practice. They sort of balance each other out. But I'm afraid I'll need to cut something down. Its a matter of what means the least to me.

In unrelated news I finally got a look at the lovely robot warp_speed is building me. I know it seems silly, but I love it. I can't wait for the competition.