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Apparently I'm a widow. It would have saved me the hassle of the divorce.

The next person who comes into my diner and asks me why I haven't put up any Christmas decorations is going to get kicked right out on their ass. And no amount of signatures on a stupid petition is going to change my mind about it. Keep your stupid Christmas out of my diner!

Huh. Fancy that. Didn't even notice I had one of these things on this blasted phone Stark lobbed at all us months back.

Name's Crowley. Pleased to meet you, I'm very sure.

Bored.

To anyone that is concerned, I'm doing much better mentally. And having read that Rita article I have one thing to say.

Go to hell! It's none of the media's business my mental state.

Never bugger with a woman what has a sword. Savvy?

[Friends]
I could use an idea for a costume. Any bright ideas?

Bit of an introduction is needed, I suppose. Greg Lestrade, at your service. Don't suppose there's any decent pubs around here?

Oh wait. Right, States. Taverns?

For the record I'm still a virgin!

I wish to go somewhere and get very, very drunk, but I do not want to do it alone. Does anyone else wish to do this? I will pay.

Has anyone else found objects that pertain to their dreams? I've found three, so far, and I know others have as well. I'll take the risk and share.

A charred spacehelmet.
Implants.
A vehicle. Mako no!

I'd just like to say that not all journalists are crazy gossip crackpots. Some of us actually care about real news.

I feel like I should apologize on half of my profession.

I'm kind of surprised that there weren't pictures of celebrities without make-up or 'hey look, some chicks actually have fat on their bodies. for shame'. That's all I seem to see when I go to the grocery store and look at the magazines. Don't people have anything better to do?

Anyone know where there might be a place to buy a costume that isn't some slutty version of something?

I have a coworker who's been taking classes to do new things. She was raving about belly dancing and archery last week. I was thinking of following her example, but I'm not entirely sure where to begin. Suggestions?

Also, what is everyone doing for Halloween?

[Club TARDIS]
Anyone fancy doing something new with me?

[Doctor (Ten Who)]
Be reasonable with your suggestions.

You ever find out what an asshole you are by getting forwarded a petition to fill out that's been addressed to, and is about you and what an asshole you are?

I miss Thursday.

I need a drink now that I am not getting random texts all day and night long. I know way too much about most of you and your relationships now.

And why is the only sports on tv now football or baseball? It will be a long year if there is no hockey.

Do you ever think it's weird? Us all gathered here in California, our dreams all starting only when we get here? I was thinking about it last night and I'm wondering if it's more than a coincidence.

All moved in and situated. Just in time for work tomorrow.

Thank you to everyone who helped.

[Crowley]
When you're sick of me, give me at least a month's warning before you kick me out, eh?

So who's all going to the Gala? And when is it happening?

To hell with being an American. I'm defecting. Take me, Britain, I'm yours!

Another fine example of the "you're not my REAL dad anyway" argument completely derailed tonight's dinner. Clearly, I should have stayed in Nottingham.

Not that death threats via letter, e-mail and text are to be taken lightly but you know what's funny? That all it took to defuse the source was a bunch of flowers and a box of chocolate.

Now I get panties in the mail and nude pics on my phone.

I need to change my number.

Is it insane to wish my best friend from the dreams was here? He's that one guy, you know? The one that always knows what to do about everything, and the one who'd get me through it when they chuck me out of here Tuesday. As much as I'm fucking ecstatic to be getting those walking papers? I kind of need a Kaldur'ahm right now, and probably am going to need him more once I'm done here. I haven't even met him in real life, because he's from Atlantis. Is Atlantis still even a THING? Is this really weird to anybody else?

I bit the nurse yesterday, which probably was a dumb move and got my ass shot up with Thorazine. I don't exactly recommend it. Guy was NOT fucking around, which means they probably warned him. I will be so damned relieved when this isn't an issue anymore...

Really, people? If you're going to kill the furballs, that's fine. But don't just leave the blood splatters and entrails on someone else's property. It's rude.

The Queen entered the Olympics via parachute with James Bond.

I have never been so proud to be technically British.

Y'know, I don't understand why people complain about these dreams. Mine are kinda kickass - there's this girl with Mayan tattoos on her hips, and damn, the things she can do...

Best dreams I've ever had.

I like my job. No, I love my job. I'm proud of what I do. I actually get paid to have fun.

So the next person who tells me how I can still turn my life around, that I can do something productive with my life... well, they'll probably just get me laughing in their face.

I am a stripper. And I love it.

I know a lot of people have been having dreams and there's a part of me that's not entirely sure that mine aren't just as bad as some I've heard about, but I really wish I could find the best friend I've never had the people from my dreams. It can't be real, of course, but to imagine that I do even a fraction of those wonderful, horrible things...

Maybe I'm going mad.

I never thought I'd miss London so much, or be so excited to be back here. I was only gone for what, six months? Crazy stuff, kids.

I'm happy to say that your magnificent assistance at the beginning of the month has helped all our fine local athletes make it here in fine style, so thank you again to everyone who helped out the SoCal Olympians fund! Just because we're in London doesn't mean our costs are all paid, so feel free to continue donating, either directly to the fund or at TeamUSA.org.

And please, please remember: Jordyn Wieber and Justin Bieber aren't remotely the same person.

This has been the longest week and I cannot wait for Friday night.

I understand why people feel the need to share their intense dislike for Los Angeles. Traffic is always a mess, the air is gray when it isn't brown and today during a quick jaunt down to city center I just so happened to catch an eyeful of a man waiting zen-like and naked as the day he was born at a bus stop.

Los Angeles is the lady that puts on too much make-up for dinner parties, the lady who covers up the scent of her unwashed body with so much perfume a French whore would turn up her nose, she's the lady who wants to be classy but won't ever be because her party dress is damnably short.

She's a dirty, cheap trick and that makes her all the more charming in my book.

Anybody on this thing know a good dog park? Turns out I'm gonna be in need of one.

( My granddaughter picked him out for father's day )

Well, I might actually have a gig. There's a listening room, otherwise known as a very small venue, over by Irvine. Anyway, local band needs an opener. Guess who they've heard playing in the park?

Okay, so does everyone have their own personal bitchy British person following them around this week?

Or am I just special?

What the devil ever happened to good, old fashioned wet dreams? I much prefer hearing about those.

You are looking at the new COO of Stark Industries. I had the papers signed and notarized today. It's kind of strange thinking I'm going to be leaving CHOC, but I really can't trust Tony to do it on his own and I think it's time I step away from the charity anyway. It practically runs itself and I'll still have a controlling interest in my baby.

Currently I'm looking for an experienced head hunter to help staff the company as well as an administrative assistant. You may message me for more details if you're interested.

Why is there is always an awkward moment when I go into a store to buy several bottles of aspirin, ace bandages, and icy hot. The clerk no doubtedly always asks me if I play sports (as if it is not evident already) and if so which one. That is when it gets awkward because I instinctively say I am a dancer... The old ladies always give me a look of disproval, the girls get jealous, and the men just check me out more and ask what I am doing later. When I tell them I am not one of those kind of dancers but a ballet dancer, no one believes me.

From now on I think I will tell people I am a football player, or a soccer player as Americans say. It might save me the hassle when it comes to buying aspirin.

Ladies and Gentlemen.

Elvis has left the building.

Since this concept is unclear to some of us, let me spell it out: when a sign says "Do Not Touch, Please Ask For Assistance", it means you do not touch it. Not with your fingers, not with your toes, not with your tongue, nothing. You keep all body parts away from whatever you're eyeing and ask one of the shopkeepers to help you.

That's what they're there for, people.

Aw hell. They hiked the cig tax again. All that's going to do is inspire me to be a more successful citizen to afford 'em. Somehow doubt that's what they were going for.

Name's Jim. I run a little tavern off Aurora named Joeyray's. Pleased to meet you all.

Are you happy, Six? I finally got on this bloody thing. It only took me all day to set up. Who comes up with these things? They should be shot.

[Locked to Family]

Hello dearies. We're going to have fun.

this is my favorite new thing