Network

When you've just killed somebody but not really because they were already dead according to a short-arsed lab coat wearing twat

If you suffer from a penile fracture and all your supposedly best friend does is laugh his arse off, it's time to re-evaluate your relationship. Even if he has very attractive hair.

I don't know why this is bothering me so much. It's not real. I wasn't really kidnapped and interrogated and tortured by nazis, and it's just a DREAM. Get it TOGETHER, Barnes, come ON. You can handle this.

True or False: Mental health days are a valid reason for missing work? I mean I can't really lay down or anything because when I do, I feel the straps digging into me, and the recliner was even worse, and I can't even turn off the light right now. obviously I'm going to lie about WHY I'm calling in since "I'm feeling kind of off" isn't a good excuse but I'd sort of like to feel less guilty about the whole calling in and lying to people, and making up a just medically acceptable enough illness to tell them that I definitely shouldn't be there. So, I mean, normal people do this, right, and not just on TV?

I also really don't want to look at stretchers or strap anybody to a board right now. It's not the same but it might as well be. It's just kind of...been a really busy last couple of days and I really need the break. and a fifth of vodka, and maybe a couple everclears... That's acceptable, isn't it?

I feel worse about this than I probably should Steve's probably handled a lot more than just this, but ...

Robots on Mars?!
How ridiculous!

But of this guy, I am a fan. STARHAWK

Damn pot-head barista put avocado in my sandwich. AGAIN!

...Heh. I don't get upset about many things, but when I do, they all seem to be food-related.

I'd stop going there, but the coffee is so good.

I think Hawke and I should've gotten over our 'issues' years ago.

Guess the dreams aren't all bad. The ones with Danarius aside

Definitely not spending many (if any) evenings at home this week.

This is exhausting but it's also awesome

We're going to need a bigger boat.

Who had the best fucking routine EVER today that should probably be considered recordbreaking? MY GIRLFRIEND IS WHO! My very stunning, brave, determined, stubborn girlfriend. Take THAT, everybody else here!

My office at the firm was broken into over the weekend. Luckily nothing was taken, but I had a bit of a mess to clean up when I got in today. We're beefing up security too. The robber put one of our security guards in the hospital. I'm about to go visit him now, make sure he's doing okay.

These are strange times indeed.

( Filtered to 'Hawke' (all of them--Merrill wasn't as specific as she meant to be) )

I'm thinking of getting a pet.

Who knew back to school would make my schedule busy. Everyone trying to get bachelorette parties (and a few bachelor parties) in before the end of summer. I haven't had a night off for a week. I will get a little time off this week though, so who wants to help me spend some of this extra cash?

I am an idiot and I am probably very lucky I don't have a broken jaw.

RORY THE ROMAN! Rory the Roman. I know why you were covered in little black marks.

Question: did your palm glow?

First a shooting at a Sikh temple, and then a mosque burnt to the ground. A sad time to be a man of faith.

Family is a strange thing.

[Private to Scott Summers]
I've a few things to talk to you about. Not all bad, I promise.

[Private to Jean Grey]
I expect something nice for my birthday.

[Private to Jubilee]
Well done.

Mr. Gold? Can you make it down to the garden?