Network

... ohgosh.

I am so sorry we didn't listen to you, please tell me you found that accordion and tuba and all the other things you needed.

...for as long as I live...I will kill it on sight and consider it to be PTSD. True, they're absolutely brilliant for target practice. Nothing better than taking aim at hairy bollocks. But I'd rather like to be done with the little menaces sooner rather than later.

( click here for more WTH HAIRY THINGS. )

You know the drugs they're giving you are too good when you wake up from a dream about tentacled alien plant things and just laugh about it.

I think Raffles is starting to enjoy this. I've seen her curl up into a ball--presumably disguising herself as one of those things to lure them in--and then she springs and eviscerates them. Much more impressive than the mouse-hunting.

...And now this happens and these...things were there to greet me when I got to work Monday.
You know, at first I thought it was pretty cute and kind of harmless. New little pets or something like that. Watching them now? I am CONVINCED that they're the first round of the alien invasion force. I've read Ender's Game, I know how advance strike forces work. Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not next month or year, but these little bastards are probably paving the way for something worse. They'll knock us off our guard, maybe excrete something invisible, with no smell, taste or other detection method, that leaves us all vulnerable when the REAL invaders come. How could something that cute do anything but?

...Maybe I'm a little too dramatic here, but you're an intelligent network, and some of you are just as crazy as I am, you get my points. The thing is, we don't know what we're dealing with, or when or why. It's...worrying. A lot. And they just keep reproducing. Who knows that the hundreth time one of them does it isn't the time it becomes a Hollywood style threat?

Have the scientists working on this found anything definite? Anybody else have solutions other than the plant ideas I've seen and sent the interns looking for? I'm not trying to be histrionic or anything, only I actually AM histrionic, because this is getting pretty close to taking up one of our entire floors.

So, uh seriously, any updates would be GREAT.

Partially.

With some assistance I've developed a system to literally remove the furry menace from our planet.

The question is getting them to the lab.

Does anyone have a solution to that?

So, I have this friend. She is not a hypothetical person, she is not a stand-in for me. We've been friends since college. She lives in Oregon so she doesn't use this network. Well, she recently got engaged and they visited last week. I absolutely detested the guy. He's crude, he can't carry a conversation, pretty sure he can't get a credit card....

I'm making a long story very short, but I may have gone to far in telling her what I thought of him. Now she's mad at me. I'm willing to admit that I didn't hold back, but she did ask for my opinion. I gave it. The guy is a loser. I don't want my friend to marry a loser. Considering what I do for a living, I thought my opinion would matter more to her. For some reason, she's choosing him over me. I know it's because she thinks she's in love with him, but love only gets you so far. One day, I can see her waking up beside this guy and realizing she's made a huge mistake.

This... sucks.

"Cause Of Accident/Injury: Hairy Balls"

...My coworkers, I swear.

We're okay! Honestly okay, just stuck for a long time in one of the buildings, then couldn't get in touch with anyone. It's been an absolute mess.

I'm so, so sorry, Mr. & Mrs. Weasley. I know you were all worried sick about Ron.

Anyone out there a lawyer or can direct me to one? Specifically wills and issues of custody.

I named my little furry guys.

Mr. White, Mr. Orange, Mr. Pink, Mr. Blonde, Mr. Brown and Mr. Blue.

Though I think I might have to start using the seven dwarves as names if they continue to multiply like this. Though I've got a lot of room, considering I'm pretty much living on the street. So.. that's good?

Tomorrow marks the third month of my community service on Mr. J's Neighborhood. At least I get to teach children how important the natural world is. If I can just survive my co-worker

I cannot say anything disparaging I cannot say anything disparaging

It's been an enlightening experience.

When the traffic light turns red that means stop. Yes, it really is that simple.