Tony Stark is a Piping Hot Mess (avengingstuff) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2019-03-12 23:11:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, kitty pryde (shadowcat), tony stark (iron man) |
Who: Tony Stark, Kitty Pryde (Heretofore known as: Purrito)
What: Tony wakes up to a very energetic and curious Kitty
When: The morning of the Tether Plot
Where: Tony's place
Rating/Warnings: Low, warnings for grouchy billionaires
Status: Complete!
Kitty didn’t even have the benefit of a hangover to explain why she wasn’t in her or Diana’s bed. Or why she was in someone else’s bed at all. She squinted her eye at the unfamiliar ceiling, with the unfamiliar sounds around her, subdued but faint.
She was dressed, though. In what she’d been wearing when she’d crashed into bed late last night. So that was a good sign. Only how did she end up away from bed?
Slowly, she rolled over.
For some women, rolling over to discover you were in bed with Tony Stark was probably a dream come true. Maybe that wasn't true for Kitty Pryde, per se, but it was still the morning she was about to have. Of course, it was also a very interesting view of Tony Stark.
Mainly because there seemed to be a lot of stuff going on with his chest that day, though it was mostly covered by a tank top he was wearing. He looked like he'd been on the receiving end of an entire bar brawl, too, and on the nightstand next to him was a car battery. As she turned, he yawned and stretched a bit. "Man, I really want some pancakes..."
Even were she single, it wouldn’t be a dream come true. Tony might be her intellectual type in a lot of ways, but he didn’t really hit many of her buttons otherwise. No offense, or anything.
Besides, she had definitely not crashed in someone else’s bed. Her mind flashed back to previous incidents and she muttered an ancient Chicagoese curse.
Mostly because Tony Stark’s chest was a mess and there was wiring leading to a car battery of all things. She propped herself up on an elbow to get a closer look and remarked. “I really don’t want to alarm you, but you’re going to want to open your eyes really, really slowly because you look like someone tried to give you a jump start.”
"Nn?" Tony grunted. He definitely would have remembered falling into a bed with someone, especially given the fact that he'd been strapped to a car battery for a day or so already. The voice sounded familiar somehow, but he couldn't quite place it as any of his many Orange County area conquests. Or semi-conquests. Or friends, even.
He cracked an eye open to glance over at her, as one hand started lazing waving towards the battery on the nightstand. "What, that? It's car battery daisy chained to an electromagnet, relax about it."
“Relax about it,” Kitty said, rolling her eyes and brushing her fingers through a tangle of curls. It was time to cut most of it off again; she’d grown to like her hair shorter.
“You’ve got an electromagnet in your chest. That’s fascinating. Does it hurt?” She poked it without really waiting for a response. That was definitely the more interesting part than waking up in someone else’s bed. Was this what it looked like before the arc reactor?
Would he get an arc reactor?
Maybe she could study the arc reactor.
"Hey." Tony sleepily brought his arm up and flailed it at Kitty, trying to move her hand away. "I know it's a sexy piece of machinery,but hands off. Because... ow. And also, are you trying to kill me? I don't need any help in this department, my dreams are already way ahead of you."
He wanted to get up and move away from all of this and what he felt were going to be a stream of questions that he'd already been asked by anyone who'd already seen him with the thing yesterday. But instead, his hand fell on top of his face, and he just kind of rubbed it there for a bit. "It hurts when you touch it. Also I'm pretty if you move it I'm gonna go into cardiac arrest. So just... why are you in my bed, anyway?"
Because that was probably the more pressing question, right?
“I’m not trying to kill you,” Kitty insisted, still trying to get a look at how the electromagnet worked. “I just really love electromagnets, okay? It’s not like I’m going to stick my finger in it and fry it or something. Anyway I woke up like this but don’t be alarmed, Orange County does that to people from time to time, we’re probably going to be stuck together for a week or two.”
Because that would be a thing, and it would probably kill him. She could imagine the disruption of the magnet -- she’d disrupted plenty of hearts in her day. Figuratively and literally.
“Why is it there? It would repulse metal. There’s entry scars, you were wounded.”
"Why are you asking me so many annoying questions? It's like - I don't know am. I need at least three cappuccinos." Tony grumbled, while trying to roll his way out of bed. There was an espresso machine down in his kitchen, but this called for the kind of cappuccino he didn't have to make himself. Especially since there was the added complication of a purrito being stuck to him like glue.
An annoying, hyperactive, silly-question-asking purrito. "At least we both have almost all our clothes on." Tony was wearing boxers and had thrown a button up shirt over himself to try and cover the mess his chest currently was, but it had gone loose while he slept. He started fumbling with the buttons.
“It’s like 8. The hour when most people are already at work. Bit late in the day for me.” Kitty usually got up at 6 or 7, even on nights she’d been out until five AM. Which was… more nights than she cared to admit.
But it did explain the hyperactiveness. Kitty was a morning person, and it was indeed a horror to behold. She glanced around. “I’m surprised you don't have like, a robot coffee machine all ready to brew some at the first signs of you stirring.”
Kitty couldn’t actually imagine Tony actually brewing coffee himself. Actually, that sounded like a great idea for the Agency - a coffee brewing robot. She could task Cisco with that, he’d love that!
“Am I not your type? It’s the morning perkiness isn’t it, bet you like a different kind of perky in the morning.” Kitty flashed him a grin and then experimented by getting out of the bed.
“I’m going to see how far I can go. Last time it was like, ten meters. Maybe twenty.” She tossed him a salute and then disappeared through the floor.
Thirty seconds later, as though someone had pulled on a string, Kitty burst out of the floor, disappeared through the ceiling, and then yo-yo’d a few times before managing to regain control of herself and collapsing on the nearest convenient surface with a groan. “...write that down, it’s not science if you don’t write that down. Mythbusers proved that.”
They were definitely not compatible. He wasn't a morning guy until at least 11pm, and that after a couple of cappuccinos. Though he couldn't say that he didn't know what the sunrise looked like; Normally that was because he'd been up all night to see it, though.
Tony watched Kitty wander off through the floor, his eyes widening a bit. It was a good time to re-adjust his clothing and get a better grip on his best buddy, the battery he hadn't named yet. Which was good, because when she yo-yo'd through the ceiling he probably would have dropped it, otherwise. "Yeah. Right... sure. Cool, cool. Kind of carrying a battery right now, so no writing it down. Plus, not sure what I'm writing down."
“I’ll write it down,” Kitty said, waving her hand and then running it through her hair. That had taken more effort than she’d expected and it had kind of hurt. Okay it had hurt a lot but that was beside the point. “Made it about eight meters before I was pulled back. Started feeling the urge to turn around just before that but I kept going and that’s when I got yanked back.”
She shrugged one shoulder. “Guess it’s your magnetic personality. Did you feel anything?”
Her stomach rumbled, and she looked down at it. Maybe they could talk about it over breakfast, and also maybe she should calm herself down, but she was feeling… energized.
New situation, and nothing horrifically dangerous, so she was mostly just curious. And awake. She gave Tony a sheepish look.
"Like I said, we need about... well now I'm thinking that I need about eight cappuccinos, and you need- I don't know. Milk? Water? Less sugar and caffeine for you, purrito. Definitely less of those two things. Pancakes? Eggs? I know what we're gonna do." Tony decided, and nodded his head while he started marching towards the open space that lead to his closet area.
It was an extremely fancy walk-in with plenty of drawers, shelves, cabinets, and racks of clothes. There were backlights, and fancy shiny wooden paneling, and Tony's form fell out of view as he rounded a corner and pulled a pair of jeans off of a shelf. "We're gonna get me the largest two cappuccinos we can find, and then we're gonna drag ourselves to breakfast. And while someone else is driving us there, I'm going to send out a company wide memo about your presence here before half of my research teams decide we're haunted and walk out on me."
She watched him as he walked to the closet area, which was bigger than her old apartment all by itself. It was pretty impressive by any standards. “I’ll try to avoid ghosting around people. Though it’s sometimes really fun to spook people.”
Kitty was going to need to have someone bring by a suitcase of clothing, she couldn’t just wander around in a rumbled sweater and jeans for however long this lasted. She had to edge a little closer, but kept the closet wall between herself and Tony for politeness sake. Showers might still be awkward, but at least they could keep a wall between them.
"Yeah, well, 8 meters under us is my kitchen staff, so who'd you end up spooking?" Tony's voice was a little muffled as he pulled another loose t-shirt on over the battery-electromagnet area. The whole thing probably needed to be cleaned and taken care of, but that was a problem for later-on-and-caffeinated Tony. Not the Tony who was, regrettably, awake and hungry for pancakes.
"I should have had you grab an espresso while you were down there, why didn't I think of that? Hindsight's a son of a bitch. Have you seen my sneakers?"
“This cute older man who was like, 4 feet tall,” Kitty said, sounding about as sheepish as she looked. She scanned around with her eyes until she found Tony’s sneakers and threw them in the general direction of his voice, careful to avoid accidentally hitting him.
“Didn’t get a chance to look at the kitchen, but now that you mention it it smelled really nice down there. I’d take you down the short way but I’m pretty sure trying to phase you right now would disrupt the battery and kill you.”
"Oh yeah, the whole- disrupt electronics with your phasing thing," Tony replied. He took a seat on a nearby cushioned footstool, and started pulling on the sneakers that Kitty had thrown at him. "Lets not do that. That doesn't sound like a party. Though I really would get a jacket at that point, right?"
"Though if they're just figurative jackets and they aren't very cool anyway? Then no thanks." He added. And even then, if it was the coolest jacket in the world, Tony figured he'd only really sign up for that kind of thing if he wasn't, you know, literally dying. Especially if there was no way to bring him back.
He marched on out of the closet, battery in tow, and started heading out of the bedroom. His private elevator awaited them, and beyond that was delicious food.
Tony might be annoying and flighty but she didn’t want to kill him. Not right now anyway. There were a few times she wanted to punch him in her dreams, but that didn’t really count.
She followed along after him, hands clasped behind her back as her stomach rumbled. “They’re really figurative so I don’t think you actually want one.”
Kitty moved next to Tony. “So how many batteries have you stowed around here for emergencies?”
"I don't know... Five." Tony guestimated. Batteries were heavy and he hadn’t had enough time to properly test how much juice the electromagnet required. That was going to be the next stop on a day that now involved dragging Kitty Pryde around town. He wasn’t looking forward to figuring out the living or sleeping arrangements, but there was sure to be some kind of compromise involved.
Tony hated compromises, especially before breakfast.
He motioned towards the elevator and used the battery to smack the down button. "Come on, Purrito. Time's wasting, and you really don't want to see me when I'm hangry."