Caroline Forbes is full of light (miss_mystic) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2018-05-07 06:55:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, caroline forbes, tyler lockwood |
Who: Tyler and Caroline
What: Sort of making up
When: Saturday May 5th
Where: Caroline's place
Ratings/Warnings: Low
Status: Complete!
Staying away from Caroline had been hard, but he had wanted to give her her space. Space to grieve her mother without the constant reminder that he had made her forget it. He had meant well, but now he was regretting his decision to compel her pain away. It was just… he hadn’t known how much it had hurt in the dreams. She’d turned off her humanity from the pain of it. And he hadn’t wanted her to go through the same pain here.
When she’d asked him to spy on Elena and Damon, he… well, he hadn’t jumped at the chance. It felt wrong to him somehow. But he’d do it for Caroline. He would have done anything for Caroline and to get back in her good graces.
And at least filling her in gave him an excuse to see her again. He’d gone over to her place, and relayed to her what he’d seen, which wasn’t much, and what he’d heard, which was more - thanks, vampire hearing. And now he sat and waited to see how she’d react to him being there.
Caroline knew Tyler was just trying to help her. She knew the reason he compelled her hurt away came from a good place. But that didn’t make it any easier. Especially with her heightened emotions. Truthfully among the many feelings that were heightened her feelings for Tyler were one of them. Both the love and the anger. She was focusing on the anger for the time being. It was easier. Even if they had slept together before all this happened he had already rejected her so many times. She wasn’t going to go through that again.
Despite how angry she was at Tyler for his compulsion after her mom’s funeral, she did miss him. More than she was willing to admit. So when he agreed to keep an eye on Elena for her, she allowed him to come over after. Now that he was done telling her about their little date she wasn’t exactly sure what to do.
“Thank you,” she finally said. “I just don’t trust Damon.” Not with what he had done to Elena the last time they dated.
“I know,” Tyler said. “You know, I don’t know what went on with him and Elena before, but I don’t think you need to worry about him too much,” he added. He didn’t trust Damon too much either, not after his last few dreams, but he could see that Damon wasn’t the same here as he was there.
He fell silent for a minute, hoping that Caroline wouldn’t kick him out, and then added, “can we talk?”
“He cheated on her,” Caroline said sternly. In a way that was clear she would not put up with being cheated on. Not that it mattered. Tyler wasn’t her boyfriend. Hell he was barely even her friend at this moment in time. But still the point was made. Caroline Forbes did not put up with cheating. Not on her friends and especially not on herself.
She paused before answering his question. He had just done what she asked. And although she was still pretty pissed at Tyler it had faded a little bit since she first turned. “About what?” she asked with a raised brow. It wasn’t exactly a yes, but it was an opening.
“About, you know,” he gestured helplessly. How could she ask about what? It seemed obvious to him. “About all of this. About us.”
“All of what?” Caroline retorted. “There is no us. We were friends.” Okay maybe that was a bit too harsh. She was pissed but she didn’t want Tyler out of her life for good. “Are friends,” she corrected herself. “But that doesn’t mean I forgive you.”
It felt as though Tyler had been slapped. He knew he had screwed things up with Caroline, but he didn't think he’d screwed them enough for her to say they weren't friends anymore. And even if she corrected herself, it still hurt. He’d given her space, like Elena had told him to, and he thought that she’d have, if not completely forgiven him by now, at least come close. He had to remind himself that Caroline was still a newbie vampire, and hadn't learned how to control her emotions yet.
Still, it hurt.
“Listen, Care, I know I probably screwed up my chances with you, and I’m going to have to live with that. But don’t say we’re not friends. These last few weeks without you have been the hardest I’ve had in a long time, and I can’t imagine you not being in my life. I knew I screwed up, and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since I did. I’ll wait for however long I have to until you forgive me - we’ve got forever, after all - but I need to know that you’re not going to decide you want me out of your life.” Because he didn’t know what he’d do if she ever decided that.
Why did Tyler have to say things like that? It made her heart melt just a bit. It definitely made her soften. No matter how mad at him she was, she did still love him. Even if being with him was the last thing on her mind right now. She still couldn’t stay too mad. Not when he was saying all this.
“I won’t,” Caroline finally said. The past few weeks had been the hardest of her life. But that wasn’t only because of the lack of Tyler. It was everything. Her mom being gone, becoming a vampire, the stuff with Tyler was at the bottom of her list. But she did remember being miserable when Tyler wasn’t in her in college. Well miserable for the beginning of it at least. The pain lessened over time, but missing him never went away. She wasn’t going to put either of them through that again.
“I’ve already lost five years with you,” she reminded him. “I’m not going to lose anymore. Even if we have forever.”
Tyler smiled then, relieved to hear it. He didn’t want to think of going on again without Caroline there. He was probably pushing his luck, but went to put his arm around Caroline’s shoulders to give her a bit of a half-hug. Even if he’d screwed up his chances of being with her, at least she was still willing to be his friend.
The second Tyler touched her, it just brought up all the feelings Caroline had for him. Feelings Caroline had been trying very hard to suppress. It was part of why she focused so much on her anger. She backed away from him, out of his grasp. “Too soon.”
“Yeah,” Tyler said, trying to keep the hurt off his face. He’d known it was a bad idea, but he had had to try anyway. “Too soon. I’ll uh, I’ll give you some more space. But if you need anything…” he didn’t know how to finish the sentence, and he didn’t think that he needed to either. Caroline would know what he was trying to say. And in a blur of speed, he was gone.