Perhaps he shouldn't have written them. They were worried because they were good people, and Theo was his family. And if they stayed together long enough and got married, Tracey would be his family too. They were happy together, the way people were supposed to be happy. Zach didn't begrudge them their happiness. He didn't have much, but he had them. And now he made them worried and sad. And Tracey had been trying to help. It wasn't her fault it didn't help.
Zach shifted to lean against Theo. Theo wasn't like him. Theo was all thinking and logic and the head of the body. Theo was Spock. But he knew how to love and felt too. But still, of anyone, he was Spock. It was hard to make himself speak about it because speaking about it tempted him to think about it. And feeling it hurt enough already. "Colin," Zach forced out the name. It had been such a happy word before, always good and cheerful. And now it was only heartbreak.