|Luna Lovegood (treasuredwit) wrote in thequibbler,|
@ 2008-01-09 16:55:00
|Entry tags:||extraterrestrial activity, federal coup 2008, john mccain, new hampshire, primaries|
John McCain: Will He Do Anything to Win?
January 6, 2008
New Hampsire-- After months of low poll ratings and set-backs (see our August 2007 article "The Chelsea Clinton Plot Against McCain"), and a showing in Iowa at only 13%, Senator and Presidential hopeful has surged to the polls, easily winning New Hampshire with 37% of the vote. McCain supporters are referring to this as a comeback, and the Mainstream Media has cast the resurgence in popularity as a victory of McCain's smart campaigning, putting him back in the race.
But is McCain's victory really the result of hardwork, determination, and fantastic luck as has been suggested? Or is a more sinister force at work in this so-called miracle? Many New Hampshire voters and Quibbler readers registered their own concerns.
"It's all very suspicious if you ask me," said Meadow Grayson, 22, New Hampshire resident. "No one I know voted for him. Anywhere you looked at the polls, people had Ron Paul buttons. And what happened to that Huckabee fellow? He was even on Letterman."
Indeed, The Quibbler's investigations have found evidence of a metaphorical 'deal with the devil,' propelling McCain to the top of the Republican candidates and opening a clear path to the White House.
Yes, recent evidence has indicated that McCain is in fact in league with a race of space invaders from Saturn who, in turn for government help in allowing them to live covertly in McCain's home state of Arizona, are fixing the elections to put their man in office. Once in office, McCain's pro-extraterrestrial agenda, which he has successfully hidden from the Mainstream Media, will certainly come into play, reforming the law in order to weaken earth's security by depleting the ozone layer.
While obviously not all extraterrestrials are considered threating, and in fact many Nobel Laureates are among their number (see our December 2007 article "The Truth About Al Gore"), we at the Quibbler have reason to believe that the particular group concentrated in Arizona are in fact hostile, and have made several threats already against human autonomy, said Arizona extra-terrestrial expert Bobby Wilson, 49.
"Me and my buddies think it's a real cause for concern," said Wilson. "I just hope McCain can be stopped."
Sadly, the Mainstream Media have yet to report on the truth about McCain, and thus this journalist fears that a McCain victory may be inevitable.
-Luna Lovegood, Editor and Contributing Writer