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Maedhros | Nelyafinwë Maitimo Russandol (nelyafinwe) wrote in thedoorway,
@ 2013-03-31 20:31:00

Entry tags:

!network post, !thread, maedhros, maglor

i can't untag the network post tag, oops.
Who: Fëanorians
What: Maedhros reunites with his most beloved brother, Maglor.
Where: Central Park
When: After Maglor arrives.
Warnings | Status: It's a tear jerker | in progress

Hope was a frighteningly flighty thing for Maedhros; it came and it went whenever it so pleased to grace Maedhros or otherwise abandon him. He never held onto it for long for that very reason, for it was constantly wrested from his hands and his heart by force, which left him desolate and worried. Save for now. Now in the moment Maedhros was filled with a dual sense of hope and desperate longing. He missed Maglor more than words could ever tell--aye perhaps only Maglor could express truly what Maedhros felt--and he wanted to believe so much that his brother had come. Weeks of mourning him, mentioning him and dreaming of him had finally pierced the layers of the universe and summoned Maglor from the world to bring him here to Maedhros' side.

He was so close

Maedhros dared hope and the force of it was overwhelming. Ah! Eru's blessing be upon him, for the two he loved most were now come to him. Assuming they found Maglor of course; he was wont to wander and for that very reason Maedhros sued forth, worried. Maglor would not know where, why or how he'd come and the strange sounds of the universe would sweep him up into her loving arms and carry him away so far none would be able to reach him. And in doing so he'd likely walk off a bridge or into traffic completely unawares and die.

And so with the sons of Fingolfin at his side Maedhros entered Central Park and dispatched the other two in different directions to cover more ground. Realistically though, Maedhros hadn't needed to do any such thing for the crowds told all. There were a number of people who had gathered and it didn't take much for Maedhros to extend his senses to find out why. He listened. The music was wrong. Not wrong in Maglor's hands--that could never be--but the discord, the dissonance of it was familiar and harsh on Maedhros' spirit and so close to his heart that he nearly missed the undercurrent of beauty within it. His heart leapt with joy and sorrow and such deep, profound pain that he almost could not move from his place amongst the crowd. He had over a foot on all of them so he need not crane or fight to see what sat in the middle of them.

Maglor.

It was his brother Maglor.

Maedhros released a cry of utter longing and jumped forward, pushing through the crowd, "Toron! Toron!"

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makalaure
2013-04-01 04:06 am UTC (link)

The Music of the trees had led him here, to this oasis in the middle of this clashing, clanging place. He could still hear the harsh discord all around him, but here at least the trees and their voices gave him something real and tangible to hold onto. Something he understood. Arriving here had been painful beyond measure, and he had truly thought that somehow he had died, although he could not understand how. But the Men with the strange weapons had told him otherwise...and they had spoken many other things as well that he did not remember. They had talked and talked but the music had been so loud that his mind had wandered far away, into this strange and exotic world with its strange and exotic Music.

When they had finally released him, he had wandered, lost, confused, and, aye, frightened, before he had heard the trees. He had an offhand notion that he had nearly died trying to get here, crossing the hard road with the strange metal boxes that had moved so quickly. There had been harsh words that he had mostly missed, and loud sounds that had frightened him, but then he had found himself among trees and grass and had very quickly forgotten all else.

His harp was on his back, and he had taken it, sitting on the nearest bench, and losing himself in the Music, learning about the world around him in so doing. It was sad, chaotic, busy, lonely, violent, loving, exciting, happy and very, very mortal, all in one. Births and deaths and sadness and living on such a scale that it could only be a world of Men, with their short, fragile lives. He shed a tear at all the feelings of the place contained in its music, not even noticing the group of people gathering around him.

But then he heard a voice through the music that jarred him into attention. He looked around, confused, his eyes finally lighting on the tall, red-headed figure of his brother.

But it could not be! They had told him he was still alive, and the music did not say otherwise! He stood, lifting his harp with him, trembling. His eyes were wide and his face drained of all color.

"Must your fëa haunt me even here?"

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nelyafinwe
2013-04-01 04:21 am UTC (link)

Tears unbidden welled in Maedhros' eyes and spilled down his cheeks rapidly. He wept openly and unashamed as sorrow, hope and a loneliness he denied every day of his life washed over him even as he reached for his brother.

"Nay!" he said, horror in his voice, "nay! I am not dead. And you are here!" he raised his hand, steady despite the rapid pounding of his heartbeat in his chest and the disbelief in his mind. "I have called you and you have come to me!" At last! At last he had come! And without waiting, for Maedhros could not hold himself longer, he closed the distance between them and threw both arms around his brother, harp and all. It was crushed between them, though unbroken, and Maedhros' heart swelled for the presence, solidity and warmth of his sibling.

He was real! He was real, solid and living flesh before him. It was no mirage, no hallucination brought on by desperate dreams.

"I am alive! I am living, beloved brother! See me? I am real," he touched Maglor's face, his dark hair then touched a kiss to his brow, lingering there in happiness.

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makalaure
2013-04-01 04:37 am UTC (link)

Tears streamed down Maglor's cheeks as he clung to his brother, although he was more careful with his harp than his sibling was. He did not understand how this could be so, how Maitimo could be alive. What was this place? What sorcery had brought him here to be reunited with his dearest and most beloved brother? He had thought him a phantasm, but he was solid and warm, and his hand was missing, as it never had been in his waking nightmares.

"Ai, but brother, you are dead. I know it. I have suffered it for three years. Alone! Alone with the music and nothing else. All of you gone, all of you gone to the Halls of Mandos and left me behind to record it all. To feel all the grief a thousand times over and live the sorrows until I can bear them no more and I fade into nothing."

He wiped the tears from his eyes, swallowing back the burning sobs so that he could speak.

"What is this place? How am I here? Or is this yet another dream, and crueler that you are here at last?"

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nelyafinwe
2013-04-01 04:50 am UTC (link)

"Shh!" he urged him, "shh! Nay, nay speak not of it now, little brother. Whatever nightmare you have come from is over," he said, framing Maglor's face with one hand and the stump of his right wrist. "It is over and you need not think on it again. You are not alone, never alone. I have promised you, and to that I hold." He folded him in his arms again, pressing his face into his brother's dark hair, breathing in the scent of him.

Feeling him.

Reveling in his warmth.

His tears fell into his brother's hair.

"I promise you this is no dream, else I would have woken long ago to darker times. I know not how you are here, I care only that you have come." He needed him, Maedhros needed Maglor far more than he had needed anyone in his life, except Fingon. And now that he had them both he dared wonder if he might hope for happier times. He would live doubly in fear that they might leave him though. But for now he flowed along the currents of happiness and poured his own soul into the Music of the world.

Around them the crowd began dispersing, losing interest in their bond and the tears that passed between them. Maedhros didn't care. He didn't notice. He was barely listening.

He loved him.

"I have missed you so deeply, brother, so much. You are my salvation. I shall never leave you. Never again."

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makalaure
2013-04-01 04:56 am UTC (link)

Maglor felt the music shift with Maedhros' joy and fear, and began to tap out the new rhythm on his back even as he embraced him. He did not understand many things about this place, alas, he understood nothing but the music that surged through everything here as well...

He snuggled against his brother, not caring about anything except the fact that he was no longer alone, that Maedhros was here, and that that automatically meant that everything would be alright. Because that was how life was supposed to be, Maedhros at his side as he had been his entire life. He couldn't remember a moment his brother hadn't been there; there hadn't been a single moment in his life until the last three years, and those had tortured him so.

He began to hum, snuggled against his brother's shoulder, not paying attention to anything but the warmth of his embrace and the music surrounding them.

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nelyafinwe
2013-04-01 05:16 am UTC (link)

Maedhros laughed freely, it was the sound of Music and Life itself, filled with happiness so rare for him that to hear it was a special thing entirely. He laughed because Maglor was the same as he had ever been with his love for music and his distraction by it. Maedhros could feel the touch on his back, though he could not discern the pattern, and felt joy for it. He'd missed this so much more than he had ever imagined.

If Maedhros could have stood there for eternity wrapped in his brother's embrace he would have. He would never move, think or try to exist anywhere but there. What cause did he have to leave, after all? But he couldn't. Fingon. He loved Fingon on a level different from Maglor, but neither more than the other and that would never change. He did linger though, close, stroking his brother's dark hair so lovingly and tenderly that it was almost pathetic.

"Come," he said gently, "we should not linger overmuch. I have sent Fingolfin's sons out searching for you and they look still. We must round them up and return home, then you might have your questions answered." He kissed his brow once more, then pulled out a phone to message his cousins before replacing it. He took his hand then and pulled him along.

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makalaure
2013-04-01 05:21 am UTC (link)

It took a moment for Maglor to pull himself from the Music, but when he did he looked at his brother with adoring eyes. "They are here? Findekáno? Turukáno? Arakáno? But they are all dead as well," he said in a voice filled with deep sorrow. "Who else is here? Our brothers? Who? Who else would I know?"

There was such hope in his voice, for Maedhros spoke of such joyous things. For three years he had been alone, and here his brother spoke of family. Of friends. Of being around those he loved and seeing their faces and hearing their voices.

"Is Lomélindë here? Wilwarin?"

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nelyafinwe
2013-04-01 05:33 am UTC (link)

"Shh!" he said again, giving his brother a Look. "Calm yourself, little brother and hearken to my words. Of our cousins Findekáno, Turukáno, Artanis and Findaráto are here. There is also the Vanya Glorfindel from Gondolin, a child called Lindir--you might have noted his childishness in the Music. A Sinda," he murmured, distracted. Who else? Who else had come.

Ah. Yes.

"Gwindor, he who began the Nirnaeth," he shook his head bitterly, but brushed off the ill feeling that rose in his chest whenever he thought on that ill-fated battle. "I am sorry," he said sadly a moment later, looking at Maglor with pain his eyes. Pain for his brother's loss. "Neither your wife nor your daughter have come. Only Artanis has graced us."

There was a pause, Maedhros lowered his eyes. "Father was here," he said quietly, in a tone so low that it could not be discerned by the ears of humans. "But he has gone. Whither he has gone I do not know. And neither can we follow," he looked at the night sky and the thought of the stars reminded him too, of the other one.

"And Eärendil."

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makalaure
2013-04-01 05:45 am UTC (link)

Maglor had somehow known when he had parted with his wife after the First Kinslaying that he would never see her again. It had been a profound sadness then, and he had wept many tears over it, both then, and in the darkness of many lonely nights. But now it was but a dull ache that was always with him, and he simply nodded sadly at his brother's words. He had not expected such joy to come to him.

"Atar?" An involuntary shudder ran through him at that and his eyes widened. His gentle nature had never been a very good match with the harsh criticisms their father doled out, and many had been the time when he had rushed to his older brother to cry out the latest insult, or the latest time he hadn't been good enough. Maglor loved his father, but he feared him as well.

But his last word caused the fear in Maglor's eyes to deepen further.

"Valar," he said, a breathy, terrified whisper. "Does he have it?"

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nelyafinwe
2013-04-01 05:58 am UTC (link)

Maedhros knew well what that shudder meant. He had the same relationship with his father that Maglor did, or rather it was a complete lack thereof. But that shortcoming they had long since overcome, or at least ignored for the most part. Perhaps only just partially. Maedhros didn't answer his brother's last inquiry, preferring to just.. walk in silence for a while.

A sadness touched his spirit again, and settled into his eyes. Or rather it rose in his eyes from the hidden depths that existed beneath the fire that smoldered there.

"I do not know," he said honestly. "I have not seen it, but he has made suggestions. Flippant comments. I do no know if he does it to taunt me or if he is just.. foolish." He looked at his brother finally, frowning. "I do not want him to have it, brother. If he does it means I must take it from him, but I am so tired."

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makalaure
2013-04-01 06:02 am UTC (link)

"Ask him not," Maglor said quietly, taking his brother's hand in his as they walked. "Do not ask, do not know. And then we need not worry. For there is so much more evil in following this oath than if we break it, Maitimo. For the evil comes only to us if we do, and it would be well deserved. I can take no more life, brother. I have not the strength for it. If he has it, let him have it."

He looked over at him, his eyes pleading.

"Please, I beg you."

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nelyafinwe
2013-04-01 06:57 am UTC (link)

He didn't say anything. What could he say? His heart begged him listen to his brother's words but his promise to his father burned still deeper in his heart and mind. Maedhros had failed their father in everything since the moment of his birth and he knew not what could possibly repair that relationship now but he was still determined to do right by Fëanor. It was his right and his duty as the oldest son to avenge his father's death, and the murder of his grandfather.

But he was so tired. So exhausted. Spiritually he was failing, he knew that with every day that passed. His spirit couldn't bear the burdens he'd brought unto himself.

"We--I swore. We all swore," he said quietly, despair seeping into his voice. "I have not asked him. I do not want to, but the doubt--" he stopped, forcing out a calming breath lest his emotions run away from him. "I am sorry. I do not wish to speak of it, brother. I do not want to fight with him anymore than I have already. Leave it at that for now, I do not want to burden you anymore than you are in your coming here. Let us return to the tower."

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makalaure
2013-04-01 05:08 pm UTC (link)

"I know we swore," he said softly. As if he could have forgotten the day that he had made the biggest mistake of his life. For he had come to see it as such. He did not blame his father, not really. He understood the pain he had suffered at Finwë's death, and at the theft of the Silmarils. And his nature had given him no other choice than to fight it with his entire being, and that he had.

But so many times in the last six hundred years he had desperately wished it otherwise. That he had not been there at that moment. That he had refused to do his father's bidding, for once in his life. That he'd had the strength to stand up against taking such a terrible oath that would destroy their family and leave only shattered remnants in a sad and terrible world.

"But I still think that there would be less evil in breaking our oath than in keeping it," he said softly, knowing that his brother would never agree to such a thing. Still, they were not wasted words if he made his point known.

He sighed, letting it go so as not to upset his brother further.

"The tower?"

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