WHO: Rogue and Erik Lehnsherr WHEN: let's go with yesterday WHERE: woods out the back of the X-mansion WHAT: Apparently you need to have a reason to do something nice for someone. WARNINGS: nah
A tent in the woods was an all too familiar scene, one that evoked memories from years ago when there had been a similar set up in just about the same vicinity to the mansion. It brought up emotions that she was still fervently working to squash, knowing there was little point in having them because the man she had loved was long gone and never coming back. Instead there was another who looked and in most ways acted exactly like him in his place and yet failed to do act in other ways that had become all too familiar to her over the months before being so heartlessly ripped away. It reminded her a bit of a mirror image, the picture presented clear but not quite right. Staying away was probably the best way to stop herself from cataloging all of those differences.
Apparently knowing that didn’t stop her from making her way to the damn tent with a bag full of water bottles and other supplies, just as she’d done a few days before, and back before Erik had arrived back in town. As much as he’d said he was leaving forever, she’d been well aware that wouldn’t have worked in the long run. And besides, he’d most likely think it was Charles doing this or sending one of the kids inside to drop off the supplies, or at least that was what Rogue hoped would be Erik’s thought process anyway.
She emptied the contents out in the usual spot, making sure the vegetables and fruit wouldn’t be crushed by the bottles, before standing back up, ready to leave before Erik managed to get back from wherever he’d gone for the day.
Erik had, in all honesty, attempted to leave Tumbleweed. He hadn’t given a thought to the place once he had piled into Ororo’s DeLorean with her boyfriend and the young weather goddess herself. Then a week passed, then two, and Erik still hadn’t found what he was looking for even as they got further and further up the continent.
Because the further he got away from Texas, the stronger the thought of that small child that was his and not his became. He wouldn’t have put it past Charles for planting the thoughts he was having of the girl in his head, but he put them out of mind as best as he could. Yet, he couldn’t ignore them completely, couldn’t run from them.
It was also becoming obvious that Ororo wasn’t really into getting away from Texas as she had claimed she was. So once they started to hit the more isolated parts of Canada, Erik finally had declared, “We’re turning back.” And said no more about it, as they started to make their journey back.
Once they had reached the city limits and the X-Mansion came into view, Erik took his leave of his two traveling companions at the edge of the property line and hiked back to where he had made a temporary home for himself. His tent, all of his meager belongings he had left behind, were still where he left them and undisturbed by all accounts. He didn’t bother reaching out to Charles to notify him of his return, simply began to rearrange his camp and then went deeper into the woods to meditate and think of his next step.
Days passed like this, with Erik simply existing and thinking and torturing himself with memories of his family that was no more. He wasn’t too surprised to see that someone - likely Charles, the old fool - had left him some supplies whenever he was gone for more than a few hours, but he had found similar supplies when he had first arrived and made camp there too. The first time around, he hadn’t touched it at all.
This time, he used them.
Then today, as he returned to camp earlier than he normally would during his ‘thinking hikes,’ he came to find out that it wasn’t Charles (or one of his orphans) leaving him supplies. It was Rogue.
Raising an eyebrow, he called out to her before she could take off, “This isn’t necessary.”
She froze at the sound of his voice, silently berating herself for not paying better attention to her surroundings. Tuning out the electromagnetic abilities gifted to her had seemed like a good idea, an attempt to avoid disturbing the area too much around her and give away what she had been doing, but now that she was clearly busted none of that quite seemed to matter. Perhaps if she had been using them she would have noticed his approach and utilized a different ability to get away before he arrived.
It would have been easy to shoot off into the sky or teleport out of the area and back to her house, there was even the island teleporter on her wrist as an escape option, and yet, Rogue couldn’t quite bring herself to do that. She’d never been one to back down from anything and she wasn’t about to start a trend of doing so now.
So instead she turned to face him. “Still gonna keep on doin’ it,” she told him, shrugging as she looked him over. It took effort to bite back a comment about how ridiculous he looked with the beard.
He didn’t get too much closer to her as he circled around to a tree stump that somehow become his unofficial armchair. Sitting down, he raised an eyebrow. “Why?” It was a simple question with what he doubted as a simple answer.
It was clear to him that this woman was hurting. There was no way to deny that, as all of her actions, all of her words, had pointed to that obvious observation. And in the beginning, he simple had not cared. It wasn’t his problem, whatever this other Erik had left behind. It hadn’t been him.
But as time wore on, as he caught sight of the child that was his and not his - no doubt a move purposefully made by Charles, as he had been the one bouncing her on his knee out where Erik had a clear eyeline to - some small sense of guilt crept up on him. She might not have been the product of his love and planning, but there had been an Erik in existence that had wanted, had loved her. And this woman, she had been a large part of bringing her into this world. So the guilt grew, though he did not yet act on it.
It was such a simple question and one that Rogue had no intention of answering in that moment. There were too many layers to it, too much raw intensity behind all of it, that she had no desire to open the floodgates and let it all spill out. More often than not she might have worn her heart on her sleeve, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t a pro at building up a hard exterior around herself. Or so she liked to think anyway. But he wasn’t one who knew how to chip away at it any longer so her confidence in her ability was a little more steadfast than usual.
She might have two versions of him in her head, but she felt at a complete loss for how to read the man before her. Constantly second guessing everything she thought she knew, all the little tells she thought she had down not quite expressing what she believed they did. Or maybe they were, but that was the problem. Her mind and heart were in constant battle over everything to do with the man in front of her, and she hated it.
All of it would have been a lot simpler if she could have just hated him as well.
“Ain’t like you were goin’ out and gettin’ the stuff.” There. That would do. It was the truth, or at least part of it, and really nothing more needed to be said.
“That somehow concerns you?” Erik asked, head tilted to one side a bit. Most people would have looked away from his unflinching gaze by now. “I manage well enough on my own,” he finally said, after she refused to look away. He had been catching small game and going out into town when he needed something more, but he wouldn’t lie to himself and say the fruits and vegetables hadn’t been a nice change from what he normally ate.
Still, there was no need for her to know that.
“But you already know that, so I’m curious as to what the real reason for all this is. I would think you would have better things to do like teaching at the school, running away to your dinosaur island, and,” here it was a pointed look that was shot at her, “Raising your daughter.”
She ignored the pointed look, crossing her arms as she stared him down. “School’s been over for a week now and funnily enough it don’t take more’n a few minutes to leave ya a few things, Erik.” It would have been so easy to become rankled over him bringing up Anka Irene, but she forced herself to remain calm, nails biting into her skin to give her something else to focus on for a few brief seconds. “I can raise her just fine and still end up droppin’ stuff off here and there. It ain’t exactly one or the other.”
Rogue did look away at that point, pursing her lips at the look of his camp. Would it have been better if she hadn’t said a word to him about her daughter on that first meeting? About the life that another him had so happily lived? She wasn’t sure any longer, guilt eating away at her for how she must have upended his life a little more on his arrival to this strange world. It couldn’t have helped any. Maybe it would have been better for him to have hated her for keeping the truth from him than the whole tent living situation again.
She couldn’t change the past though and there was little use dwelling on any what if scenarios. Turning her gaze back to him, she continued, “And considerin’ its only gonna go gettin’ hotter, you’re gonna need water, and while I’m sure you’ve been catchin’ whatever game ya can manage around here, fruits and vegetables are vital. Especially for their type of iron intake.”
“I know the man that was your husband - he meant something to you. But it’s been very clear between us that I am not him. Why do you insist on caring about my well being? It makes no logical sense.” Erik had caught the twitch when he had brought up mention of Anka Irene. It wasn’t that far of a leap to make what this was about. “Is it for your daughter’s sake? Are you expecting something from me?” Scratching at his beard, he showed no outward show of emotion, but his heart had started beating just a bit faster.
She stared at him for a long moment, her expression changing from one of disbelief to annoyance. “Since when does everythin’ gotta have a logical explanation.” Because he’d come to eventually learn that very rarely did any of Rogue’s choices come from any sense of logic. At least not the kind that made sense to people who thought the way he did. “And just cause I’m doin’ somethin’ nice don’t mean I expect a dang thing from you.”
Men were ridiculous. Especially this man standing in front of her; didn’t seem to matter what version of him she was talking to. “And that beard looks ridiculous on you.”
“It looks fine,” he said, because of course he focused on the beard. Standing up, he approached her, only to stop just shy of her to pick up an apple from the supplies she had brought. “Thanks,” he said, tossing the apple up into the air, catching it, and taking a bite out of the apple before walking away. “You can show yourself out,” he called back to her, disappearing into his tent.
Rogue floated up about a foot into the air before waving her hand, utilizing the magnetic powers she did have to upend the stakes and supports to send the tent crashing down on him, before heading up a little further into the air. “I’ll make sure to bring ya a razor and a mirror next time.”