WHO: Alina & Mal WHAT: Alina proposes to Mal WHEN: Backdated to Monday WHERE: Mal's farm WARNINGS: None
Alina had been thinking a lot since they had returned to the farm. She wasn’t sure if she could imagine a place that she would have wanted for them more. She missed their friends back in Ravka, but if the farm had been in their homeland, Alina would have settled there with Mal in an instant.
She loved him. She had always loved him.
With everything they went through, that love grew a little bit more. It turned steadier until it was something that, Alina realized, she wasn’t unafraid to use as a foundation for the rest of her life. She was afraid of loss. But she thought she always would be now. But she didn’t want to be so afraid of losing something with Mal that she never tried to make anything at all.
It was early, and Alina didn’t think Mal was quite up yet. She watched the sun crest over the horizon through their bedroom window. Her head was against his chest, and she listened to the evenness of his heartbeat, her fingers splayed against his ribs.
“Mal?” she asked quietly.
…
Mal was exceptionally glad to be back. Not that he hadn’t enjoyed being at sea, indulging in luxuries (even if they felt somewhat foreign and strange), seeing new worlds. But at heart he was a homebody, and he had only just gotten his small home, his greenhouse, and his farm before being torn away from this world and into another. Part of him had felt resigned to the fact that he might never see the place again, that it was only natural he shouldn’t get to keep what he had so selfishly asked for; he certainly hadn’t ever expected to own his own piece of land.
But here he was, and his land was still here. The gym where he’d been working was still here as well, which was a blessing, because the farm was not ready to make him any amount of money, and Mal was relieved not to have to take funds from those who were putting it together for people who needed it.
He worked hard, slept well, ate heartily, and after the week was out, he felt very settled back into this life.
He had worked at the gym and in the fields the night before, and so he had slept the deep sleep of exhaustion from physical exertion. Even though he was a light sleeper, it still took him a moment to drag himself out of the depths of unconsciousness back to waking, towards Alina’s voice and her hands on his chest.
“Mm?” he murmured, opening his eyes a crack.
--
Alina’s body warmed just at the sound of his voice, at the feeling of him quietly stirring beneath her. She closed her eyes, lingering in the moment. This was all she had ever wanted -- and nearly losing him and herself had only exacerbated that awareness.
She didn’t know how long they would be allowed to, but she wanted to keep this all for as long as she could.
“Let’s get married.”
…
Mal’s mind was not yet awake, but those words gave a jolt to his system, and he blinked a few times before lifting himself up on his elbows to look at her more closely.
“What did you say?” he asked, not entirely certain he’d heard her correctly.
--
Alina looked up at him, resting her chin on his chest. She knew that she should feel bad for springing this on him when he was half asleep, but she didn’t. She found it unlikely that there was going to be much of a discussion. Something inside of her had stilled and turned absolute once she had spoken those words. There was no doubt in Alina’s mind.
“I want to marry you,” she said seriously.
…
Mal was now fully awake. He searched her face, not because he suspected she was joking, but because he wanted to take in every bit of this moment, particularly the way she was looking at him. He leaned back down against the pillow so that he could reach out and brush a strand of her hair back behind her ear.
It took him a moment to find words, and then he said, “Yes. I do.”
--
Alina didn’t know if she had ever felt a happiness like this. It was simple and yet it was deep and profound, and she felt like that was everything about their relationship. He was familiar to her as breathing, and she just needed him in the same way.
She smiled up at him quietly, overwhelmed by the notion that this might be the norm for a little while -- being interlaced in bed on the farm.
She braced both of her hands against his cheeks and gently kissed the side of his mouth.
“We could go today,” she said.
…
“Where do we go?” Mal asked. He honestly didn’t know. He hadn’t looked into anything about marriage, hadn’t actually considered it as a real possibility for anytime in the near future.
But they had been here a long time, and even if they only got to be married here for a day before going somewhere else, it would mean a lot to him. He did not need to spend too much time considering the logistics, except for the how.
--
“Some place government-y, I think,” Alina said, not entirely sure either. “We have to sign papers?” That’s what she thought at least. She wasn’t entirely sure if they needed to be married in a church or anything like that. At the very least, they could start figuring those things out today.
She didn’t want or need anything more. Just knowing that there was something else binding Mal to her, that it was a promise for the rest of their lives, was enough. It had always felt strange describing Mal as a “boyfriend” to others. That term didn’t begin to cover the vastness of what he was.
…
“Okay,” Mal said. Wherever they had to go, he was willing. He had already walked, ridden, sailed, hundreds of miles at her side or in order to find her. Following her to a government building was easy by comparison.
He smiled at her, and pressed his hand against her cheek. He leaned in and kissed her, savoring the feeling of her lips against his. “Let’s go and find out.”
--
Alina wondered if this should have felt unreal. It didn’t. It made sense, and she was grounded in the decision even as she glowed with happiness.
Alina pressed herself a little more warmly up against his body, appreciating it for the strength and comfort that it had brought her over the years. She was still annoyed with him sometimes about beautiful he was, and he had only grown more so in the satisfaction he found with working his own land.
“You know that I love you, right?” she asked.
…
Mal smiled at her warmly. “Yes.”
Despite all that they’d been through, that was something he had not doubted in a long time. It obviously tore at Alina, who kept wanting to come back to him, in spite of the pressure to be the Sun Summoner and then the Queen. And in some ways, that had made it harder; they both wanted badly to be together, but couldn’t. And so Mal had resigned himself to his role as a weapon in her hand, a shield to protect her life, because what the world needed from her was bigger than them both.
But he knew she had still loved him. And he, of course, had still loved her all along.
He kissed her again, his fingers tangling deeper into her hair. “I love you, too.”
--
She was selfish, but then, she had always known that. No one would have knowingly picked Alina Starkov for their saint. But what Alina did know was that she fit together with Mal Oretsev. They had made themselves into halves of one another.
“We’re getting cake afterward,” she told him matter of factly as she slid on top of him, her fingers carding through the hair on his chest.
…
Mal grinned up at her. This was part of why he loved her so much; she was straightforward, but fun, and never failed to surprise him, while still managing to be familiar and comfortable.
“One cake for each of us,” he suggested, brushing his thumb over her cheek. “Otherwise we might fight over it.”
--
“That might be its own kind of fun,” Alina answered impishly, smiling down at him. She turned to nip at his fingertips with her teeth.
“Is there anything you want as part of the day?” Alina asked, because she wasn’t sure. She suspected that he would also want something simple, but she didn’t know if they would buy rings or anything like that.
…
“Hmm.” Mal took a moment to think about that, because he genuinely had not done that, yet. Not that he’d never thought about it, but marrying Alina was a dream he’d actively suppressed for a long time now, at home. Even now that they were together here, it hadn’t quite seemed like a viable option to think about; there was too much uncertainty about how long they would be here, and when they would get dragged back home, just like Nikolai had been - twice.
He kept his hand pressed against the side of her face. “I just want to spend it with you,” he said. “I’m sure we’ll find a way to celebrate properly.”
--
“I’m pretty sure I’m a requirement for the day,” Alina said with a smile, but she understood. The rest would fall into place. Overly dramatic gestures had never been in their nature anyway. It would likely be them, together, and then heading back to their farm, where they might make and take a meal together. And then eat some good cake and hopefully spend the rest of the evening in bed.
…
“Are you sure?” Mal teased. “I’m pretty sure I could manage to marry you without you.”
He couldn’t, of course, and even if he could, he wouldn’t want to. She was the whole point to him, as he was the whole point to her. But he could not resist the joke, although she would likely make him regret it.
--
“You can manage the wedding night without me as well then,” Alina answered, sticking her tongue out at him. And then, it was truly a remarkable gesture of maturity, she grabbed one of his nipples and twisted it.
…
Mal laughed, a full belly laugh, and then it was cut off sharply when she twisted his nipple, giving him a jolt of pain. “Ow,” he complained. “Saints, Alina. Are you going to treat me any kinder when we’re married?”
The answer was no, he was sure. And that was not a dealbreaker.
--
“No,” Alina answered without any remorse. “And you’re going to marry me anyway.”