bethen avilla ; the circle mage (bethe) wrote in thedas,
The revelations delivered with such a rapid fire pace had been so overwhelming; Bethen couldn't decide whether to be giddy, or in mourning. Her parents had passed, far too soon for their time even though their children had survived them, but her siblings lived. For that, she almost wanted to praise the Maker for seeing them through a dark time, even though she had not believed in his will or his benevolence in so long. She didn't even truly believe that he'd played as large a role in it as their parents' love for their children did. However, her emotions were riding high at the moment, swelling her heart with joy that she couldn't find an outlet for. She wanted to weep and laugh at the same time. For all that she was experiencing within, though, her face remained completely empty and impassive.
As they stepped into the main chamber of the Chantry, the mage could barely hear what Alderic was saying; his words entered her ears, but they made little sense to her erratic mind. It raced with questions and possibilities, ideas never even once considered -- she had a niece! Beautiful, dear Ana, a mother and a wife! Her wedding was surely something stunning, after all that she had talked about her fantasy gowns and settings when they were young. And Ramon! She couldn't imagine what he looked like now. The last time she had seen him, he was only four years old, clinging to their mother's skirt. He was crying, for her, incapable of understanding why she had to leave. But he had to be twenty now, at least. He was a man. Oh, her heart ached for being unable to witness him stretch out, tease him about girls and teach him what she knew of growing older. She was deliriously happy for them, of course. But touched with sadness, regret. She had missed so much. It was so strange to think how far their lives had moved on, without her.
Alderic was apologizing for something. Beth didn't know what, beyond the usual condolences one received when hearing a loved one had died, but she nodded and brought a small smile to her lips, for his sake. "It's all right..." she murmured, still confused, but not wanting him to feel guilty for anything. Feeling selfish for not listening, Bethen made an effort to focus her attentions on him, and was surprised by his suggestion. It was not that she thought him inconsiderate -- far from it, he was one of the most thoughtful, charitable people she knew -- she simply didn't expect such positive encouragement to take a significant detour for a personal matter. They had been friends for years, but rarely had they ever discussed their families, their backgrounds. She was just as guilty of forgetting that the people within the Tower hadn't always simply been there. But she was truly touched by this sincere gesture, and the fact that he had stood by her through a difficult, and previously thought of as insurmountable, task. It was more than she could have ever asked for from him.
His kindness and her already fragile emotional state had suddenly brought tears back to her eyes, and her limbs were trembling again. It was all just so much to take in. She shuddered with a sob and a laugh all at once, a pale hand rising to cover her mouth, but failing miserably at keeping the dampness and the sounds at bay. "Oh, Alderic," was all that Beth could say to warn him, before throwing her arms upwards and draping them over his much higher shoulders until she could link her fingers behind his neck, with no concern at all for the fact that they may have had an audience. Armor was hardly a comfortable thing to press her flushed face against, but she pulled him into a tight embrace nevertheless, incapable of finding any other way to express her immense gratitude for his presence and his friendship.