Brennan wanted her to look at him, rather than into some unknown distance. He wanted to to look at him. Yet, he did nothing. Instead, his eyes closed and he took a deep, bracing breath. He tried to capture the words that he wanted to say, words that he needed to say more than he needed her to look at him, but he breathed out without ever finding them.
This sort of thing was not covered in his lessons. His mother had never imparted some golden drop of wisdom regarding this, because such a happening was far beyond the reach of what even she could have imagined. The world beyond the mountains was a strange and oftentimes inconceivable place, full of evils and pleasures unimaginable. He had been forced to find his own way, same as Imenry. What if you do not like your way? It surprised him to find that she felt the same. He had done things over the past three years that he was not proud of, had been forced to be someone that he was not. From the sound of it, Imenry felt even worse than he did, or she felt that she had done worse. In the end it amounted to the same.
"I do not have the answer that you want to hear, Imenry." He finally said, "Only you can figure that out, but I know my answer." It was his turn to look away, and he scuffed the dusty toe of his worn boot against the equally worn and ragged edge of a rug. "As long as I know that what they did was wrong, I'm not like them. It's the day that I understand their malice that I'm afraid of." With a wry grin he added, "You say that you don't want friends, but I just met two people that care a great deal for you and you called them friend. You say you don't want to care, but clearly you do. So from where I'm standing, it looks like you're a long way from being like them."