|stacey_mcgill (stacey_mcgill) wrote in the_brook,|
@ 2010-10-11 20:30:00
|Entry tags:||!finished, sam thomas, stacey mcgill|
Prior to this weekend, Stacey had been excited to get Columbus Day off from work, but now she thought that work might have been the better option compared to sitting by herself in Mary Anne's empty apartment. Mary Anne was visiting her boyfriend and her roommate was at work, leaving Stacey to sit and angst.
And she knew that she was angsting and that it would annoy the crap out of her if she had to hang out with anyone doing the same, but she was in the mood to feel sorry for herself and nothing was going to stop her. Today was the anniversary of her miscarriage and it shouldn't have been a big deal; Little Elizabeth was clearly not ever supposed to make it and nothing could be changed about that. Sometimes Stacey even almost forgot about her, but when she became broody she let it consume her and she fantasized about what life would be like today if her baby had lived. Would she and Sam have gotten married? Or would everything have gone the way that it did, anyway?
They hadn't spoken since Friday night and it was killing her. She had hoped that he'd wake up on Saturday morning with the realization that he couldn't live without her and of course he wanted to marry her someday with no doubt in his mind. Then he'd call and she'd rush home and they could be them again.
But no call came on Saturday or Sunday and now Monday was mostly over and there was still no word. Stacey wondered if Sam even remembered what today was, but maybe he wouldn't call even if he did remember. Maybe he hadn't figured out a way to tell her that his feelings hadn't changed and he didn't really want to be with her forever.
Maybe it was time to just give up. He would have called by now if he wanted to, if he really cared. And Stacey needed to stop replaying his promises in her head, the ones about how they'd talk soon and their relationship wasn't over. Because maybe it was.