InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Who'd be a teenage Mum?"

Antoni, First year TEACUP. (pobrebarco) wrote in steamengines,
@ 2009-12-27 22:45:00

Who: Antoni Ruiz.
What: What's for the best isn't always what one wants.
Where: His dorm room back at TEACUP.
When: Backdated to 12/20, after they returned from The Island.
Warnings: None. Starts in Spanish but there is translation right afterward.

Antoni más querido,

¡Qué carta tan encantadora! Estamos tan contentos que tu haces bien en este programa. Este es una oportunidad fantástica y no podíamos estar más orgullosos de te. Su padre y yo estamos bien, sobre todo porque sabemos que estás en manos buenas. Espero que tu recibieras el paquete que enviamos junto con esta carta. Esté seguro para compartir las galletas con todos sus amigos.

Sabes que amaríamos tenerle a casa durante la Navidad. Sin embargo (y sé que a su padre no le gustaría mí decir tan), sería lo mejor para te permanecer en la TEACUP en cambio. La escuela será capaz de asegurarle de modos que dos de nosotros no pueden. Por favor no piense mal de nosotros, ni de tu. La escuela es una oportunidad fantástica y le dará la vida que siempre queríamos para te.

Con amor,

Mamá y Papá.

Dearest Antoni,

What a lovely letter! We are so glad you're doing well at this programme. This is a fantastic opportunity and we couldn't be more proud of you. Your father and I are well, especially because we know you are in good hands. I hope you received the package we sent along with this letter. Be sure to share the cookies with all of your friends.

You know that we would love to have you home for Christmas. However (and I know your father would not like me to say so), it would be best for you to remain at TEACUP instead. The school will be able to provide for you in ways that the two of us cannot. Please do not think ill of us, nor of yourself. The school is a fantastic opportunity and will give you the life we have always wanted for you.

Love,

Mom and Dad.

He placed the letter down next to the unopened package. Tired, hungry, and a bit bruised, Antoni supposed taking another beating wasn't all that out of place. Even if it was just hurt squeezing his heart until it threatened to burst. Clenching his hands into fists, he sat at the foot of his bed, trying to will what little nerve he had left to hold himself together. Just a few minutes longer, locked up and alone in ~~his room~~ this place, that's all he needed. When he couldn't block out the joyful noises of his fellow students laughing and getting ready to leave, he went to the bathroom and splashed water on his face.

If Antoni's face was already wet, he decided, no one could see if his own tears mingled with all the other drops. Not that he would let anyone in, but it's the thought that matters.

This was fine. It had to be fine. He was used to not having money. Hell, it had been his way of life until the last couple of months. Strange. Antoni never questioned it, never felt bothered, just accepted everything as it was. But now what? No, he knew what was wrong. Funny. Now he didn't need, but it still hurt everywhere. He hated it, hated being here and knowing in his heart he needed to stay or he'd be ruining everything for all of them. Fuck.

Reclining on the bed, he scrunched his eyes shut, trying to recreate everything that he needed in his mind. The brightly dotted night sky, the fragrant mixture of sea spray and orange rinds (even if that only occurred in summer time), the lilting soulful sounds of la guitarra echoing from the cobblestones of the streets, everything that was home.

It didn't work.

So instead, he curled on his side and stared at the wall until he could think of nothing at all.

He was used to losing. It was nothing new.