Aww! A lovely, smooth read, with enough echoes of and allusions to canon that I didn't feel asea in the alternate reality. I loved your Snape - reading Machiavelli yet swearing the air blue, not to mention being bossy in bed ("Do I look like a girl to you?" *flail* I don't think I should have found that as hot as I did).
I also, randomly enough, liked the simile Harry folded like a cheap card table - such an image. Well done!