DRAGON PR0N-CRACK: "PROPER BONDS"
(A bonding fic for Meri)
Harry's efforts to pull his cock out of Snape's arse were futile.
"What the hell did you use for lubricant? Ow! Careful!"
Panting, Harry leant forward. "You made it, you tell me. It was in the bottle labelled 'Lubing Potion.'"
"Not 'Lubing Potion,' you fool. 'Linking Potion.' As in bonding. Attachment. Glue."
A silence. Then, "Fuck," Harry said in a weak voice. "It's all your fault, you know. Your handwriting's atrocious."
"My handwriting is perfectly adequate, it's your eyesight that leaves something to be desired." Snape dropped his head into his hands, leaving his arse high in the air and full of Harry. "I can't believe you would think I would label something with the word 'lubing.'"
Harry pushed his glasses further up his sweaty nose. "Right. Fine. Blame me. Just tell me how we unstick ourselves."
"Ice."
"Ice?"
"Ice. Linking Potion is used to bond substances together when I'm working with highly flammable ingredients in conjunction with one another. The warmer the substance –"
" – Like my cock – " Harry said, a bit of pride returning to his voice.
Snape sighed. "Yes, Potter, like your cock – the tighter the bond. Hence, we need ice."
One Freezing Charm and several ice cubes later, Harry's cock once again slipped easily in and out of Snape's arse. Merrily pumping away, Harry aided Snape's straining prick with a warm, properly lubed hand. They both climaxed, spurting copiously and with great enthusiasm.
Collapsed on top of Snape, Harry watched as his spent cock slipped from Snape's battered arse. He sighed happily; watching his cock leave Snape's body was one of his favourite after-sex activities. He snuggled closer.
"Mmm. I like the smell of that new shampoo that I left for you," he murmured into Snape's ear.
Snape grunted, then froze. "What new shampoo?"
"The one labelled 'Irresistible Hair.' I found it on the table earlier and put it in the shower for you."
"You mean, 'Irreversible Bare'? The depilatory that I confiscated from some fourth year Slytherin girls?"
Years later, watching the sun glint off Snape's naked skull and running a hand over his own bald pate, Harry liked to tell the story of the last shampoo that Snape ever gave him.