Secret Snarry Swap: FIC: Severus Snape, and Horns, and Males, and Veelacorn Tails Title: Severus Snape, and Horns, and Males, and Veelacorn Tails Author:drwritermom Other pairings/threesome: None Rating: Teen and up Word count: 2270 Content/Warning(s): Innuendo, implied mpreg Prompter/Prompt: No. 18 from themightyflynn: Severus realised who his Veela (or whatever other creature) mate was the first time he and Harry met after Harry's twenty-first birthday. Now he just has to work out how to convince Harry that a relationship with him wouldn't be a bad thing. Summary: Severus Snape makes his obligatory appearance at The Brat Who Slew Snakeface’s twenty-first birthday gala. Who knew that they were mythical equine creature soulmates? Watch the hooves fly as two Hogwarts residents reveal their secrets to the bewildered pair. And why is Albus in time out? A/N: Any day that I can parade my favorite, homegrown mythical creature is a good day. I thank the clever prompter for this delightful prompt. And my profound thanks to badgerlady, for her beta generosity, and our swap moderators, for the work you do, corralling all this creativity. And Happy Winter to you all!
Severus Snape, and Horns, and Males, and Veelacorn Tails
It all began at the Brat Who Vanquished the Snake-faced Bastard, Harry freaking Potter’s twenty-first birthday ball. The Ministry for Magic, headed by Kingsley Shacklebolt, had hosted an extravagant gala to fete their media-shy hero, who was compelled to attend by the Minister himself. Severus, as a highly respected war hero, and Hogwarts headmaster, was likewise ordered to attend.
The night was a boring parade of dignitaries, celebrities, and sycophants, whose singular aim was to commandeer the attention of Britain’s most eligible wizard. Severus Snape did not march in that parade. His goal was to acknowledge the surviving Order of the Phoenix members in attendance, deliver a perfunctory, obligatory birthday greeting to Potter, and then escape to Hogwarts, to enjoy the comforts of the headmaster’s suite and a snifter of brandy.
He swiftly paid his respects to the Order members in attendance, and was the second in the line of those wishing an audience with the guest of honor. As the clearly besotted witch ahead of him was led away by a member of Kingsley’s staff (she did not go quietly), Severus was too distracted by the drama to notice the gorgeous, swishing, jet black horse tails that had materialized upon his and Potter’s backsides. Harry did notice, and was incensed!
“Who in the name of Merlin’s hairy scrotum cursed me, and the headmaster, with these showy horses’ tails? Don’t I get enough bad press without someone making us both proverbial horses’ arses?”
“Oh shit. Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh SHIT!” Snape muttered. “Potter, you’re coming with me. This is not a request” he growled, as he grabbed the startled birthday boy and Apparated him clear through the Ministry wards and into the headmaster’s private chambers.
Snape barely caught Harry as they landed, preventing what would have been a humiliating landing on all fours. Although Severus would have relished such a tempting sight, his soulmate on all fours (the tails erupting on Harry’s twenty-first birthday all but confirmed this), Potter was not ready for such intimacies. Some serious discussion was needed before any relationship could flourish.
“What the hell do you think you are doing, kidnapping me in full view of almost all of wizarding Britain? I should have you hauled away by the aurors!”
“Potter - Harry. Please calm yourself. I mean you no harm. You have not been hexed, you have just come into your creature inheritance. Coming into contact with your soulmate triggers the transformation.”
“I must have fallen into some strange parallel universe or astral plane, for my reality has always been that you, Severus Tobias Snape, despise me and all of my male ancestors, past, present and into perpetuity.”
“Harry, while I am impressed with your new and improved vocabulary, I must explain something. When one partner of a soulmate pair is significantly older than the other, there is a natural animosity between the two, until the younger partner is of age. It is an ancient, protective magic that shields the soulmates from impropriety, and prevents the younger soulmate from being unduly influenced by the older of the pair.”
“Let’s suppose I believe this claptrap you’re spouting. What do you mean by undue influence?”
“One, no, make that two, examples immediately spring to mind. Take quidditch. If I had known that you were my soulmate, I would have made it my business to subject you to every protective charm known to wizardkind before you ever mounted a broom. And I seriously doubt I would have tolerated your entrance into the auror academy after your eighth year, had I been aware of our bond.”
“I did end up dropping out of the aurors after the first week. The instructors used me for target practice, in retaliation for the length of time it took to kill Voldemort.”
“It should never have been your job to do so. Dumbledore could have easily enlisted the goblins to find and destroy the Horcruxes. They possessed the knowledge to destroy them, even in living victims. And the aurors surely had the necessary skills needed to kill him, once he was fully mortal. Albus put entirely too much stock in a prophecy that only played out as foretold because he caused the events that made it so.
“You really did care that I was used as his sacrificial swine?”
“I regret using the term ‘pig raised for slaughter’. You were an innocent sacrificial lamb.”
The building tension in the room made Harry unwilling to discuss the war any further. He quickly got to the heart of the matter. “How can we be soulmates if you loved my mother?”
“I can only guess that I was attracted to the traits she possessed that you eventually inherited. She was my closest friend. There was never any physical attraction, although I jealously coveted her attention. You should know that we did reconcile when she was carrying you. Dumbledore made me personally explain to your parents why they had to go into hiding. I was shocked when she forgave me. James just figured I’d suffered enough, for I was still suffering from Cruciatus aftershocks when I pleaded my case.”
“So, was this protective magic the only reason for our mutual hatred, or were there other reasons you despised me? If we are soulmates, I don’t want to be with a mate who doesn’t eventually love me. I deserve the same love and acceptance freely given to every other witch or wizard.”
“Surely you are feeling the rapid dissolution of our mutual enmity, Harry. I am seeing you now as you truly are - an intelligent, generous, kind, creative, and extremely attractive mate. Holy Merlin, now you are sporting a gorgeous golden unicorn horn, flowing raven locks, a chiseled human torso and six-pack, and the lower body of a stunning coal black stallion. Shit - now there are wings, black as the darkest night to complete the transformation!”
“Umm, Severus - I guess I should now call you Severus - the same transformation has occurred to you! You are magnificent. Did you even know that we were soulmates?”
“Dumbledore always suspected, but I thought he was on another one of his pixie hunts. When his portrait learns of this, I’ll never hear the end of this.”
“It is a very attractive end that you now sport, Severus” chimed Albus from his portrait above the mantel.
“Hush it, you meddling fool” Severus grumbled, before magically turning the portrait so that it faced the wall.”
“So, Severus, what exactly are we? We appear to have the magnificent looks and wings of a dark veela, the golden horn and hooves of a unicorn, and the body of centaur.”
The somewhat garbled voice of the painted Dumbledore responded, albeit somewhat petulantly. “The two of you are members of a nearly mythical creature race known as the Veelacorns. You would have known that for certain if you hadn’t rudely placed me in muggle ‘time out’.
“Severus, I should have told you that time out never works. At least it never worked for the thirty seconds Dudley was in the time out chair before Aunt Petunia would cave in to his crocodile tears and give in to his demands.”
“I’ll place you in the Slytherin boys’ bog if you don’t shut it, Albus. This is between me and Harry.”
“I think I’ll visit the Fat Lady, if it’s all the same to you” he squawked, before stalking out of his portrait.
Severus sent his Patronus to Madame Pomfrey. He had questions before he was willing to consummate the bond with his mate, and he was certain had some of his own.
Madame Pomfrey was swept into the headmaster’s suite on the heels of Kingsley Shacklebolt and his auror escorts. The minister and his detail stood stock still, mouths hanging open, taking in the gorgeous creatures before them. Madame Pomfrey, truly a credit to her profession, was a consummate professional before the two gentlebeings.
“I see the two of you have come into your inheritances. I’ve been expecting this. I knew of your natures when you both had your Hogwarts entrance physicals.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Harry, when Severus came to Hogwarts, there had not been a documented Veelacorn pair in Britain in over two hundred years. The inheritance does not manifest unless there is a soulmate with compatible magic. When you arrived, ten years ago, I sensed your nature, and your compatibility with Severus, but you were a child, far too young to learn of your fate. As it turned out, anyone learning of this bond could have potentially cost you your lives during the war. Perhaps that is why Dumbledore put such stock in the prophecy, to prevent anyone else from learning of your bond. He merely switched the focus away from your bond and onto the prophecy. Forgive the man his machinations, he saved your lives.”
“Madame, what beings have Harry and Snape transformed into?”
“Minister Shacklebolt, Harry and the headmaster are the first Veelacorn pair to grace Great Britain in two hundred years.”
“So, there is no crime committed here, although there will be if we attempt to interfere with their bonding. Veelacorn pairs are fated soulmates, gentlemen. Poppy, Severus, and Harry, my detail and I will leave you now. Be well, my friends, and name the foal after me.” With a knowing smirk, Kingsley led his entourage out of the castle and back to the gala, to do some serious damage control with the press.
“Well, that was embarrassing. Severus, why did you summon Poppy?”
“Mister Potter, I believe I was called to answer any questions you might have about the creature you have become. Do you have any questions?”
“Will I remain in this form permanently?”
“No, you will be able to revert to your human form after you consummate your bond. You will need to transform if you desire offspring. I have to warn you, though, that your first coupling may well impregnate you, Harry. Normal contraceptive charms and potions are totally ineffective in your creature form.”
“Do you have any questions, Severus?”
“I have two questions for you, madam. The first is simple. Can we access our magic in our creature form?”
“All other spells, other than contraceptive spells, are at your disposal.”
“Must we complete our bond immediately, or do we have time for a proper courtship?”
“All human artifice is washed away when two soulmates transform, there is no need for courtship. You are meant to bond, physically, after the transformation is complete. I will leave you to your conjugal activities.”
For a “blink and you’ll miss it” moment, the mediwitch sported a Cheshire Cat grin before returning to her infirmary.
Harry turned to face Severus. “I can hardly remember why I despised you, with you looking so brilliant, vulnerable, and overwhelmingly sexy,” Harry whispered.
Severus fired off another Patronus, this time, to Hagrid. “Rubeus, clear the unicorn paddock and make sure no creature or wizard can access it for at least twenty four hours, except for Mister Potter and myself.”
Hagrid, having been briefed by Pomfrey, prepared the paddock and shielded it from onlookers.
The stunning Veelacorn mates Apparated to the paddock and were immediately embraced by the pitch black sky, and the gentle light of the full moon. They frolicked and cantered with a joie de vivre that had heretofore escaped them. As their inhibitions melted away, Severus and Harry began an age-old dance of seduction. Pheromones wafted through the gentle air currents until Harry was begging to be mounted, knowing instinctively that he was meant to accept Severus’s seed.
High pitched whinnies and squeals, as well as lower pitched snorts, reverberated throughout the whole of Hogwarts and the Forbidden Forest, as Severus and Harry joined in several rounds of exquisite human/equine bliss. So powerful were their pheromones that the centaur, thestral and unicorn herds in the surrounding forest were swept along in their own collective pas de deux. Hagrid chuckled, knowing there would be a bumper crop of foals, come Spring.
A truly spectacular sunrise heralded the union of the Hogwarts headmaster and the wandmaker’s apprentice. Fully human once again, the naked-as-the-day-they-were-born soulmates Apparated straight to the headmaster’s bedchamber, atop the sumptuous, already turned down bed, for some very tender yet highly energetic lovemaking. When their conjugal activities moved to the bathroom, Harry caught a glimpse at the new tattoo on his left arse cheek, ‘Property of Severus Snape’, in Snape’s trademark red scrawl.
Before he could open his mouth to complain, Severus stole a glance at the “I finally caught the snitch” tattooed upon his tadger.
“These are the most inappropriate, prurient soulmate marks ever to appear upon a witch or wizard!”
“Severus, they’re perfect. No one will ever see them, except for the two of us. I think they suit us right down to the ground!”
“Like the ground I pounded you into last night,” Snape chortled.
Almost five months later, Christmas Eve Night, another full moon up above, on the snow covered unicorn paddock. Two fully transformed Veelacorns are once again blanketed in gentle moonshine and a velvety black sky. Once again, they have come here to mate, this time, with a wish to create a new life. This joining is almost silent, with each partner fully absorbed in love for the other, and reverence for the transformative life magic such love can create. And on this night, their love and reverence transformed into the spark of creation that is the beginning of all life, muggle and magical alike.
May the love and reverence of the wintertime bring a spark of magic to us all.