Secret Snarry Swap: FIC: All I Want for Christmas Is You Title: All I Want for Christmas Is You Author:maraudersaffair Other pairings/threesome: None Rating: NC-17 Word count: 2000 Content/Warning(s): Pining, Christmas Fluff, Light Angst, Past Relationships Prompter/Prompt: No. 30 from alisanne: It's his fifth Christmas after the war and Harry is done living for everyone else. He's finally going to go after what he wants: a life with Severus Snape. Summary: All Harry wants for Christmas is Severus Snape. A/N: Thanks for reading!
Harry was lost. He was confused. He had quit the Aurors and many of his friends. He had quit his girlfriend, the woman to be his wife, and he wasn’t sad. They still remained friends.
He was uncertain about his future, his passions, and his place in the world. He was not uncertain about Severus Snape.
It was strange. It was unbelievable. But Harry wanted Severus. He wanted his old Hogwarts professor, the hero of the second war, and nobody, not even Ron and Hermione, could tell him otherwise.
It was the week of Christmas, and Harry was lonelier than usual. He had a lot of empty time on his hands, and he spent much of it in Diagon Alley, annoying Severus and frequenting his shop.
He liked his visits very much. They were for him, not anyone else. He went because he wanted to see Severus, because it made him happy to witness his dark looks, his swotty humor. He liked pestering him with questions and showering him with compliments. He wanted to see the older man blush.
That day nearly every shop in Diagon Alley was packed with customers. Even Severus’ shop was busier than usual, though Harry wasn’t sure why people needed potions for the holiday.
He slipped into the shop and spied over heads to glimpse Severus, who was talking softly to an elder woman with a cane and a small bird on her shoulder.
“Yes, but will this stop the pain?”
“Rest assured, madam. This is my best potion for arthritis.”
“But I don’t have arthritis!”
Severus gave her a level look. “You have pain in your joints?”
“Yes.”
“Then try my potion. If it doesn’t work, it will be free of charge.”
“All right,” said the woman, running a long, gnarled finger over her bird, “but I don’t like it when people waste my time!”
“Of course not, madam.”
When Severus was done at the till, Harry braved approaching him.
“Hi,” he said, a little awkward.
“Hello, Potter. I don’t have time answering any of your banal questions today. I am quite busy.”
“I can see that. Need any help?”
Severus hesitated. There were two customers vying for his attention. One man was actually waving both his arms as if he were a mile away and not two steps.
“I can’t pay you. Not now, at least. And you mustn’t touch any of the potions.” Severus glared. “Do you understand me?”
“Yes, absolutely.” Harry was excited.
“Throw on the apron in the backroom and come back out quickly. Just show customers where everything is. Don’t touch the till!”
“Yes, sir!” Harry said, and darted to the backroom. A few minutes later, he was directing customers to the correct shelves and offering his opinion about the potions he liked the most. “Yes, yes,” he said to the arm-waving man, “Black Morning is great for hangovers, despite the name. I use it myself. According to Mr Snape, it’s the petals from the Black Bat orchid that really does the trick.”
“Oh,” said the man, contemplating, his watery gaze roaming up to Harry’s forehead. “Good Heavens, you’re Harry Potter.”
Harry shrugged. “Yeah.”
“What the bloody hell are you doing working here?”
He shrugged again. “I like the company.”
The man plucked the vial off the shelf. “Merlin, if Harry Potter says it’s good, then it must be!”
Harry smiled awkwardly and guided the man to the till.
They worked for hours, side by side, seamlessly weaving about the shop as though that they had been business partners for years. It was hard for Harry to not glance at Severus every minute or so, and when he did, he found that Severus was looking at him, too.
When it was all done and the shop was shut for the night, they went up to Severus’ flat and collapsed on his sofa. Harry leaned his head back on the cushion and turned to face Severus, who was breathing deeply with his eyes closed. It almost looked like he was sleeping.
“Are you awake?” Harry whispered.
“No,” Severus answered.
Harry smiled. He wanted to run his fingers over his warm throat and feel his pulse.
“Are you tired? Do you want me to leave?”
Severus didn’t answer, but he frowned.
“I don’t want to be a bother,” Harry said quietly.
“You’ve never been a bother.”
“Oh? Even with all my stupid questions?”
Severus opened his eyes to look at him. “Will you stay for dinner?”
Harry blinked in surprise. “Yes, but—”
“If you have other plans, just say so. I promise you won’t break my heart.”
“Do you want to be alone?”
“Not particularly.”
“I don’t have any plans.”
“Come to the kitchen.” With a groan, Severus stood from the sofa.
The kitchen was bigger than expected. Harry had only seen it a few times, when Severus had asked him up for a quick snack, and he’d always liked watching Severus move about it, commanding and domestic.
This time Severus stopped short of the cooker. He stood, arms at his sides, his chin tilted down. His expression was always so damn unreadable when they were alone.
They stared at each other in silence.
“What about that dinner?” Harry asked.
“Oh, right.” Severus rummaged in his magical refrigerator. “I’ve got cold chicken and some leftover cheese. How about some sandwiches?”
“Lovely.”
Severus squinted at him. “If you don’t like this, I’ve got beef. I could make us a cottage pie.”
“No, the sandwiches are fine. I wasn’t being sarcastic.”
“Oh.” He turned his back on Harry, dropping the ingredients onto the counter, his shoulders pointy. Harry wanted to go to him. He wanted to wrap his arms around him and bury his face in his neck.
Severus fixed their sandwiches and brought them over to the table with a bottle of mead. They ate in silence for a few minutes.
“I enjoyed working in your shop today,” Harry said.
“The help was not unwelcome,” Severus said stiffly.
“Can I help again when you’re busy?”
“You may.” He paused to inspect his half-eaten sandwich. “I hope you understand that working in a shop is beneath your talents.”
Harry blinked. “Are you complimenting me?”
“I’m merely stating the facts.”
“I liked working in your shop. It was easy. I didn’t have to make decisions.”
“You will waste your life if you always choose the easy option.”
“What are you saying? Do you want me to return to the Aurors?”
“No. If that’s not what you want to do, then don’t do it. But do something else that’s worth your time.”
“I don’t know what that is.” Harry fiddled with his cup of mead. “So much of my childhood was a struggle. I’m tired of fighting. I just want to be happy for a little while.”
Harry took a deep breath. “Only when I’m with you.”
The silence was so heavy that Harry couldn’t lift his gaze from the table.
“I see,” Severus said quietly.
“I know it’s barmy; I know it’s stupid -”
“Potter, be quiet.”
Harry managed the courage to glance at him, and what he found made his breath catch. Severus’ eyes were intense, and his cheeks were a bit flushed. Harry had caused him to blush.
“Are you finished with your meal?”
Harry nodded.
“Good. I want to show you something in the lounge.”
They went back into the lounge, which was only a little bigger than the kitchen. The furniture was dark and secondhand, and Harry had always wondered if it’d all belonged to Severus before coming here.
“It’s almost Christmas,” Harry said, staring at the light snowfall through the window.
“Yes,” Severus said. There was a pause. “I have a present for you.”
Harry turned around. “What?”
Severus produced a present neatly wrapped in silver and green. “Open it.”
Not knowing what to say, Harry took the present to the sofa. He opened it slowly. It was a book: Quidditch at Hogwarts. Harry read the blurb on the back, still silent.
“I thought it would interest you,” Severus said.
“I had no idea you’d get me something,” Harry said quietly. He looked up at Severus meaningfully. “You never hinted at it. You never suggested that you liked my presence.”
“I didn’t throw you out. That should be enough evidence.” Severus’ smile softened his blunt words.
“I’m embarrassed,” Harry said with a laugh. “I didn’t get you anything.”
“There’s still time.”
“Yes, quite right.”
Severus paced the length of the room, black robes trailing, his hands clasped behind his back. “There seems to be something unspoken between us.”
Harry’s stomach squirmed. He licked his lips and forced himself to keep looking at Severus. “Yes.”
“I don’t want to be presumptuous.”
“I guess I’m trying to tell you how I feel.”
Severus’ steps faltered. “It hasn’t been a year since you broke it off with Miss Weasley.”
“No.”
“I am not like Miss Weasley.”
Harry hid a smile. “You’re not.”
Severus gulped, and his expression was strained. “I’m too old for you.”
He stood. “No, you’re not.” He tried to approach Severus only to have him step back.
“You need to say it. I must hear it to believe.”
Gulping, Harry said, “I need to hear you say it, too.”
“Of course.”
Harry inched closer, and this time Severus allowed it. “I think I fancy you.”
“You think?”
“I know I fancy you.”
“Romantically? Sexually?”
“Yes.”
Severus sucked in a loud breath. “And Miss Weasley?”
“Forgotten.”
“But you remain friends.”
“Yes. I don’t think of her in that way anymore.”
“Good,” Severus said, his chest moving quickly. He stepped closer.
“All I want for Christmas is you,” Harry whispered.
Severus snorted, but he looked very pleased. “I knew there had to be a reason why you were bothering me, but I didn’t dare to hope.”
“We have so much history, I know, but I want you, I want you—”
Severus kissed him. It took Harry a moment to understand, to register that their lips were touching, but then he moaned and deepened the kiss.
He was kissing his old professor; he was kissing Severus Snape, but they had both changed, and he wasn’t a child anymore. He understood how love and desire and sex worked. He understood that he wanted this man to shag him until he couldn’t bloody walk.
“Please,” Harry whispered.
“Anything. I’ll do anything.”
“I want you inside me; I wanted your mouth—”
Severus groaned deeply and kissed him again. They were pressed together, and Harry felt how much Severus wanted him.
“Take me to bed; I don’t care—I don’t—”
Severus grabbed his hand and drew him down the hall, into a dark room with an unmade bed and a few melted down candlesticks on the bedside table. Severus waved his wand and those candles ignited.
“Please,” Harry said, dragging him onto the bed.
“Yes, yes,” he murmured.
They kissed and kissed as they helped remove their clothes. Severus was warm and hard, and Harry tasted his chest and nipples, then down, down to his belly and thighs.
“Do you know what you’re doing?” Severus breathed.
“Let me show you,” he said, and Conjured up some lube. He prepared himself with careful fingers, his eyes never leaving Severus’ face.
Severus stroked himself as he watched. “Can you handle me?”
“Get inside me. Let’s find out.”
“Fuck,” Severus said, his voice rough. He was trembling as he got into place. “Are you sure?”
Harry clutched the sheets with both hands and widened his legs. “Shag me, love.”
Severus pushed into him, and they both groaned. Harry forced himself to breathe; it hurt in a good way.
“Are you okay?” Severus said, gasping.
“Yeah, just move.”
“Fuck,” Severus said, thrusting, still trembling. “Fuck, fuck.”
“Do I feel good?”
“You’ve no idea.”
“Kiss me.”
Severus kissed him, and they panted and moaned together as Severus quickened his thrusts.
“Touch yourself. I’m not going to last.”
“Severus,” Harry whispered, his hand urgent on his weeping cock.
“Fuck.” He groaned, his rhythm faltering.
“Say my name when you come.”
“Harry,” he whined, moaning desperately. He came and Harry felt some of it drip from him.
The knowledge that Snape was coming inside him tipped Harry over the edge, and his orgasm was so powerful that he pushed Severus out.
“You’re beautiful,” Severus said, watching him come down.
When it was all over, they clung to each other, warm and sedated. Harry opened his mouth to his neck, breathing him in.
“No need to get me anything,” Severus said, half-awake. “This was my present.”
Harry laughed and kissed his cheek sweetly. “Happy Christmas.”
They fell asleep, wrapped together under the warm duvet, as snow fell outside their window.