PRIDE CHALLENGE FIC: As Good as it Gets Title: As Good as It Gets Author: suitesamba Pairing: Harry/Severus; Harry/Ginny Other Characters: Minerva McGonagall Rating: R Word count: 3678 Warning: *None * Summary: Harry wants Ginny because he doesn’t know what he really wants. Fortunately, when it comes to figuring out what he really wants, Severus is around to give him some pointers. A/N: Unbeta’d. Written for the “Pride” Challenge at Snape_Potter. Disclaimer: Not mine. Never were. Never will be. No profit is being made from this amateur work.
The first letter was delivered by owl on a Sunday morning in September while Severus was eating breakfast in the Great Hall.
He gave the delivery owl a piece of bacon and placed the letter to the left of his plate. He continued eating, ignoring the letter altogether as he helped himself to a poached egg and a piece of toast.
“Aren’t you going to open Harry’s letter?” asked Minerva.
He turned his head slowly to stare at her.
“Harry’s letter?” he asked. “Are you talking about Potter?”
“Of course I’m talking about Harry Potter,” she said. “I didn’t realize the two of you were corresponding.”
“We aren’t,” he said. He spread jam on his toast, added bacon, then folded the toast in half to make a bacon sandwich.
Minerva narrowed her eyes at him. She pointed at the letter. “But that’s Harry’s….”
“I am aware that it is Potter’s handwriting, Minerva. Like you, I was forced to decipher it for six years.”
“Hmph.” Minerva poured herself more tea and topped off Severus’ while she had the teapot in hand. “Well, if you write back, send Harry my regards. We miss him around here. It was so nice to have him back for a few months.”
And while Severus would never acknowledge it to Minerva, he quite agreed. It had been nice. Nicer than she knew, certainly.
When Severus’ Defense Professor had resigned in March after what they now referred to as “The Incident with the Muggle Hair Dryer,” the Board of Governors had asked the Ministry to lend an Auror to Hogwarts to get the students through to the end of the year. And the Aurors had sent Harry Potter.
In fact, Hogwarts inherited Harry Potter only weeks after he and his long-time girlfriend decided to “take a break” and “see other people” before they “took the plunge.”This decision had made Harry grumpy and irritable, and had ultimately landed him the Hogwarts job, which was widely considered a punishment.
To this day, Severus was a bit unclear how he had ended up shagging Harry over his desk in his private potions laboratory halfway through Harry’s short tenure at Hogwarts. He remembered that there had been shouting – a great deal of it, in fact – and a few well-placed insults. Yes. Harry had insulted his nose. Had insinuated that its great size had prevented him from getting close enough to any woman to kiss her. At that point Severus had suggested that Harry’s girlfriend wouldn’t want to “explore her options” if Harry was any good at all in bed. Various insults relating to penis size followed until Harry had raised his hand as if to slap Severus in the face and Severus had caught his wrist to stop him.
They had remained frozen, panting, for a heartbeat’s space, and then Harry’s arms were around Severus’ neck, and he was pressing Harry against the wall, and Severus was showing him exactly how one managed to kiss despite having a generously-proportioned nose.
Severus was not especially proud of his lapse in professional behavior, of allowing himself to be baited into an argument with the popular but obviously unhappy Potter, of trading barbs and insults worthy of fourth-years. He had not, previous to the altercation, wanted to kiss Potter at all. He had never, ever viewed Potter as a sexual object. He believed Potter to be straight. If he’d had any same-sex experience at all, it would have to have been in the Muggle world. If he had so much as looked sideways at a male, let his eyes wander in the Quidditch changing room or the Aurors’ lockers, the news would be leaked to the Prophet before Potter finished dressing.
But the fact was, he had kissed Potter. And Potter had kissed him. In fact, they had moved from kissing to groping to frotting in a matter of minutes. That first altercation had ended with both of them coming in their pants like teenagers and agreeing to never - ever – speak of what had just happened between them.
But Potter was back in his office six days later, for what started out as a terse discussion of curriculum and ended with what they came to refer to as “The Desk Incident.”
They held to their promise to not speak of the “The Wall Incident” and added this second mistake to the taboo list.
Potter had been deliciously untrained, virginally unaware of the joys of penetration and the prostate. He was oddly agreeable to be the submissive partner, given the fact that he’d been shagging Ginny Weasley for four years. He’d left Severus’ laboratory with a rather vague smile on his face, looking well-shagged and walking oddly.
It surprised neither of them that Severus made a personal visit to Potter’s quarters five days later to review the detention schedule. Review turned into debate over the entire theory of detention, and what it accomplished, and how it could most effectively be administered. Debate degenerated into argument and then Potter was accusing Severus of being a sadist when it came to the students. Severus retorted that he was more of a masochist to put up with the sort of professors the Ministry assigned him. How that argument ended with Severus folded on the sofa, knees pressed up into his chest, topping from the bottom, he didn’t know and preferred not to consider.
They knew it had to end. Even though they deliberately found reasons to be alone in each other’s company, and gave each other significant, assessing looks in public places, they continued the charade of disliking each other intensely and using the sexual encounters as a de-stressing mechanism.
It was abundantly clear to both of them, by the time the term was over and Harry was leaving Hogwarts, that they had run out of educational issues on which they disagreed. They had resorted to arguing about the Ministry, the British Muggle government, and the new, less conservative cut of the student uniform robes.
It was also clear that their sexual relationship was at its natural end. Harry had never given up on going back to Ginny, having a family of his own (a girl and a boy, a cottage in the country, a crup and a kneazle) and resuming his rising career with the Aurors. This thing with Severus had been a surprising and enjoyable way to release tension, and he felt well-equipped now to deal with the mundane aspects of red-tape and politics in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. Or so he told Severus, the day he left.
Severus put it behind him. He had never expected Harry to stay. He had grown fond of their meetings, if not of Harry himself, but he was pragmatic. He was also a busy man, with quite a few Headmaster obligations over the summer holiday.
He had a Defense position to fill, for example. Oddly, he hadn’t gotten around to moving on that while Potter was here.
So, three full months after Harry had left Hogwarts and returned to Ginny, here was a letter from Harry. Unexpected. He wondered if it was an invitation to the wedding. That would be particularly ill-advised, but just like Potter.
He waited until he was in his personal quarters before opening the letter.
The letter was brief, to the point, and courteous.
Dear Severus:
I’m having a bit of a problem and hope you’re willing to help me out.
Ginny and I are trying to make a go of it. It took most of the summer to work things out, but we’re seeing each other exclusively now.
The thing is, there’s something wrong. I think it’s all the extra hours I’ve been putting in on security for the National Quidditch finals. I just can’t get excited when I need to, you know. With Ginny’s schedule, we only get to see each other on the weekends, and she’s getting a little impatient with me. She’s ready to haul me off to St. Mungo’s for a check-up, but you know there’s no way that won’t make the Prophet.
Can you help at all? Maybe with a potion?
I understand if you’ve got too much going on with the school year just starting, but if there’s anything you can do – like sending me the formula so I can brew it myself – I’d appreciate it more than you know.
Harry
So, things weren’t all sunshine and flowers with Potter and Ginny Weasley.
Of course, Severus knew what the problem was. But it wouldn’t do to tell Harry. He was going to have to figure this one out himself, though Severus could help hurry things along a bit.
Fortunately, he had just the thing to help Harry with his problem.
Dear Harry:
I’m happy to help you out. The potion included should give you an immediate erection that will last until orgasm is attained. It should not be used long-term, but is perfectly safe for occasional use until your schedule evens out.
Severus
~*~
The second letter came on Saturday evening while Severus was enjoying an especially good raspberry torte while the students had treacle tart for pudding.
“Odd time for an owl,” said Minerva as the ordinary barn owl swooped down and held its leg out to Severus while it eyed his torte.
Severus made a noncommittal noise and reluctantly gave the owl a small bite of cake.
“Is that from Harry again?” Minerva was craning her neck to see the letter.
“Apparently,” said Severus. “The boy misses Hogwarts. I expect he’ll be wanting a full-time position here when he’s ready to give up the Aurors.”
Now it was Minerva’s turn to make the noncommittal noise. She eyed the letter curiously and smiled to herself five minutes later when Severus strode quickly from the Hall, letter in hand.
~*~
Dear Severus:
Wow. That was some potion. I took it just like you said and my body responded right away. You should have told me not to be on my feet when I took the potion – the rush of blood from my head downward almost made me faint. I was harder than I’d been since – well, you know – and bigger too. Ginny was impressed. Her eyes bugged out and she couldn’t keep her hands off me.
Listen, I don’t want to sound ungrateful, because I’m absolutely not. But is the potion supposed to make you hard and excited, or just hard? Because it didn’t seem to matter how hard I was – I just didn’t really feel much like having sex.
I mean I did – have sex, that is. I never had that much stamina before – ever. Finally I had to fake an orgasm (don’t ask – let’s just say she was convinced) then hurry into the loo and jerk myself off to get rid of that damn erection.
So – can you help me with the excitement thing?
I hope the students aren’t driving you spare.
Harry
Severus couldn’t help the knowing smile that stole across his face.
Oh yes, he could certainly help Harry, though his solution was not the kind Harry expected.
Dear Harry:
I’m happy the potion worked for you – at least from the mechanical perspective. However, I suspect your work situation is interfering with your ability to relax. I’ve included a magazine that both you and Miss Weasley might enjoy.
I suggest that you take the potion (sitting down this time) and then look at the magazine together. Perhaps it might provide both inspiration and excitement.
And really? You faked an orgasm? Do tell….
Severus
~*~
The third letter arrived during breakfast on a Monday a week later. Severus was able to hide this letter from Minerva, since most of the school was getting their owl post at the time and even Minerva had an owl or two of her own to deal with.
Severus read the letter in the courtyard during first period when nearly everyone I the school was otherwise occupied.
Dear Severus:
Well, it was a good idea and it worked – kind of.
Just like you instructed, I took the potion before Ginny came over then put the magazine on the bed so we could look at it together.
Co-ed naked Quidditch! That was inspired! She was all over me, talking about riding my broomstick, and before I knew it she was straddling me and yeah…this time I didn’t have to fake an orgasm.
The only problem is that all I could think of with her riding me like that, with her breasts jiggling as she threw her head back and moaned, was two bludgers getting ready to smack me on the head. I had to close my eyes to get rid of that image, and that was good, because the images from the magazine filled my head then and we both came away satisfied.
I hope they put a woman on the cover next time, because when I closed my eyes, I kept seeing Alberto Monet in my mind. He’s the Irish Keeper who looks a bit like Viktor Krum.
What do you think I’m doing wrong?
Harry
Severus chuckled. He folded the letter and pocketed it, and considered his response.
Dear Harry:
I suspect that, as an active, physically-fit Auror, you might enjoy a more masculine woman, one who does not wear her hair long and cover herself with floral scents.
Perhaps you could discuss hairstyle and cologne choice with Miss Weasley?
Closing your eyes was your downfall. Focusing on the woman in front of you, the one you are actually in the process of shagging, will certainly keep Quidditch cover boys out of your mind.
Please, please, promise me you will never again describe details of your sexual encounters with Miss Weasley.
Severus
<~*~
The fourth letter, quite surprisingly, was delivered by Harry’s personal owl, which arrived late on Saturday night and pecked persistently at his bedroom window until he opened it with a curse.
The owl swooped around his circular bedroom – two levels above his office – then landed on the bedpost and promptly coughed up a pellet onto his duvet. It pecked at his fingers as he tried to remove the letter.
He had an idea Harry Potter was not happy.
Severus:
Was that your idea of a joke? I’m beginning to think you don’t know very much about women. While your idea has some merit – that I probably prefer more masculine, less girly women – Ginny wasn’t too happy with my suggestion that she cut her hair and wear a more spicy cologne. I told her she didn’t have to buy any – Ron has some I like and she could just borrow his.
She stormed home all out of sorts just a little while ago.
You got me into this mess so I’m counting on you to get me out of it.
Help. Please. Just…help.
Harry
Fortunately, Severus had one more suggestion for Harry.
~*~
Harry did not owl back after he responded to Harry’s fourth letter.
Instead, when Severus awoke the following Friday night at eleven in the evening because a corporeal Patronus was snorting in his face, and made his way to his office, he heard a very disgruntled Boy-Who-Lived arguing with the gargoyle at the bottom of the stairs.
He uttered the password and stood calmly in front of his office door, arms folded, and watched Harry as he rode the spiral staircase up.
A moment later, Harry stood in front of him. He had a black eye and was strangely quiet.
“It didn’t work,” he said bluntly.
“I gathered that, seeing you are here instead of at home in bed with Miss Weasley,” answered Severus. He put one finger under Harry’s chin and lifted it, turning Harry’s head to the side to study his eye. “Unless you’re coming to thank me for saving your relationship?”
Harry glared. The glare was less than effective coming from one good eye and one half-closed black and blue one.
“For the record,” he stated, “Ginny was not interested in anal intercourse. At all. Nor did she find it intriguing – in the least– to ‘top’ me with a strap-on.”
Severus raised one eye-brow in an elegant arc.
“Oh?” was all he said.
“You knew and you didn’t tell me! You let me fumble along with Ginny when you knew the entire time!” Harry was poking a finger at Severus’ chest now.
“Knew what?” asked Severus, stepping backward into his office with Harry following.
Harry backed him against the wall. He was nearly as tall as Severus, and was staring him in the eye.
He took a breath. A deep breath.
“It would never have worked with Ginny,” he began. He took another deep, fortifying breath, releasing it slowly. He met Severus’ eyes. “I’m gay, Severus.”
Severus suppressed a dozen snide and snarky comments. He waited a long moment, then fixed Harry with a calculating look.
“And you think I caused this sudden change in sexual preference?” Severus asked.
“Of course you did!” said Harry. “No – wait. I don’t mean you made me gay. You couldn’t have. I’m not an idiot. But before…before you…I only had Ginny. I suppose – well, I thought that was as good as it got. But after, when I went back, I started seeing men. Everywhere!”
“They do account for roughly half the world’s population,” Severus said. The corner of his mouth quirked up.
“Very funny. You know what I mean. But, Merlin, Severus! The barista at my favorite coffee shop – I suddenly realized he had the most gorgeous eyes. And the recruit trainer’s arse – how could I not have seen that before?”
He took a step closer to Severus.
“And what’s more – I noticed guys looking at me. Checking me out, Severus. Looking at my arse.” He took hold of Severus’ shoulders. “What’s wrong with me? Why did I never notice this before?” He gave Severus a little shake, and Severus grasped his wrists and moved his hands down so that they rested comfortably on Severus’ hips.
“You chose your course in life rather early, even before you had finished growing up. The desire for a family of your own directed you to the only family you had ever had. You never gave yourself the opportunity to consider all of your options.”
He said it quite calmly, and without judgment, trying to ignore the way Harry’s hands fit so perfectly around him.
Harry stared at him. His face went through a range of expressions as he grappled with what Severus had suggested. Finally, he smiled.
“I think you’re right,” he said, his voice a bit shaky. “I thought this summer – well, that it was just a reaction to the problems I was having with Ginny. That I was just getting it out of my system.”
“Is it out of your system?” asked Severus, leaning against the wall behind him and looking Harry in the eye.
They stared at each other a long time, until Harry’s face changed and realization dawned.
“No. It’s not. I need to get out there, don’t I? See what I’ve been missing all this time.”
Severus nodded curtly. “You do. You have had a sum total of two sexual partners? One female, one male? Not a very strong sampling.”
Harry nodded. Then, surprising Severus, he threw his arms around Severus’ neck and hugged him tightly.
“Thank you, Severus,” he whispered. He held Severus even tighter. “Thank you, thank you.”
And Severus let him go, made him go. Harry was nowhere close to settling down, to understanding what he really wanted.
He had options to explore.
~*~
And inevitably, as with all things, time passed.
Five years later, Severus was once again without a Defense Professor. It was only November, but Professor Dimitri had been hit with a bungled Obliviate spell, and was in St. Mungo’s indefinitely.
This time, Harry Potter volunteered for the job.
The Headmaster invited the new Defense Professor to his quarters for a drink on the first Friday night of his tenure at Hogwarts.
They argued over the curriculum.
They discussed the new detention policy – heatedly.
But when it came time for insults, there were none. Harry had nothing negative to say about Severus’ overly-generous nose. Severus did not insinuate that Harry was an inadequate lover. Instead, Severus poured them each a measure of his best scotch and they sat on the sofa together, facing the roaring fire.
“So, are you seeing anyone?” asked Harry, affecting a casual air.
Harry already knew the answer, of course. The Headmaster, after appearing at the annual Freedom Day Ball with Robert LaSalle on his arm for three years, had flown solo in May.
“Not currently,” answered Severus. He took a drink of scotch then chanced a glance at Harry. “You?”
Harry shook his head. His break-up with the Wasp’s reserve Seeker two months before had made the front page of the Prophet.
“It seems our timing is fortuitous,” said Severus.
The attraction was still there, as was the chemistry.
This time around, there was still frenzied wall sex and shagging Harry senseless on his desk. But there were slow, languid blowjobs in front of the fire, and buoyant, slippery sex in the prefect’s bath over the Christmas holidays. There was sleepy morning sex in Severus’ magnificent four-poster, and midnight snogging on the Astronomy Tower, and a trip together over half-term break to Florence. This time around, Harry had other bodies to compare to Severus’, and knew that Severus’ arse was scrawnier than most, that his cock was as generously proportioned as his nose. This time around, he had experience enough to appreciate Severus’ voice, and the way his eyes looked right through him, and his long-fingered hands, and how thoroughly, obsessively attentive he was as a lover.
And when the Wizarding World discovered them, there was a bit of commotion, and some bits of Severus’ past were dredged up that neither wanted to remember, but it all died down soon enough.
When Professor Dimitri didn’t return at the end of the year, Harry stayed on at Hogwarts.
He knew he’d never get Severus out of his system.
And having Severus – well, that was about as good as it gets.